Happy Now?
by Belle Vita
Summary: Jack isn't sure he even wants to heal from his past when he meets his new neighbor Kate. How much are faith and trust worth?
1. Happy Now?

Happy Now?

Happy. How could anyone ever define it? Is it the only thing to aim for; the ultimate goal?

Jack Shephard wasn't happy; at least not in any sense he'd ever heard. He worked long, miserable hours at the hospital, cutting away at people in some attempt to prevent a social life from forming. He was a likable enough guy, he supposed- polite, charming if he wanted to be, attractive. He always held the door open for people, made women feel special, complimented others. But what was missing? What was this hole in his life, and why didn't he want to fix it?

His girlfriend hadn't appreciated any of this about Jack; and he knew it was within her right to end it with him since he was never home anyway. But to him, it was just another thing in life he'd failed; or rather, never finished. Lately, especially he seemed to be good at that. Why waste his time finishing things that didn't really matter to him anyway? Despite the way it sounds, Jack was not depressed; he wasn't some desperate shell of a man waiting for an answer to his problems. Rather, he went about his business, almost nonchalantly, making those around him think he had an easy, perfect life. After all, he was the handsome, talented surgeon who all of the female nurses and patients fawned over.

All he could tell himself was that his life wasn't as bad as it looked to him, but not as great as it appeared to everyone else. Jack was certain he wasn't happy, but wasn't sure about anything else.

"Dr. Shephard I need you to sign these discharge papers," Lauren, a nurse told him.

He snapped out of his haze and took the clipboard from her, shaking his head. "Sorry, I'm kind of out of it today," he explained, smiling slightly.

She nodded. "It's okay, you're only human," she reminded him. She was one of his few coworkers he suspected had any idea what his life was really like. Lauren was married to the chief of surgery- surely she knew the tales of long hours and no motivation towards anything else in life.

Like most other nights, he trudged out of the hospital with nothing else but crawling into bed on his mind. It was late, a little past 2AM when he got to his car and drove the 15 minute commute to his apartment, which was modest in terms of his salary. Unlike when he had girlfriends, or when he was married, he felt no sense of guilt returning home so late- he had no one to be home for, no one who needed him. He strolled down the interior halls of the apartment building, painted a soft grey color with carpet almost matching- as if they were supposed to blend in, nothing about them was supposed to be special.

Then he noticed her. Jiggling with the doorknob of what he could only assume was her apartment, unless she was trying to break in. She saw him approach, but said nothing, and he figured it was better that way. Just another new neighbor, who would move out, move on with her life, while Jack knew he would still be there. He unlocked his door easily and slipped inside, and set his keys and bag on the side table, like always. Just like he was always reminded of what his life was once like in this apartment- full of laughter, what he thought may have been happiness, but had crumbled as one force after another left his life.

He grabbed some leftovers from the fridge- what was left from one of his meals at his mother's house. He chuckled to himself when he thought of how his mother was always trying to shove food down his throat. It was one thing she could still have control over in his grown life, after all. Jack ate in silence at the kitchen bar, his now bare feet digging into the soft carpet. He'd been listening for quite some time now- the woman he'd seen earlier was still in the hallway. Only now she'd turned to banging on the door and cursing, mostly to herself he suspected. He heard the distinct sound of a body sliding down the wall, thumping to the floor. Without thinking, he got up and looked out the peephole. She was slumped with her back against the wall across from his apartment, her head back and eyes closed.

She was really quite beautiful, he saw, as he looked past the strained appearance of her face, imagining the soft features that really rested there. Slowly he opened the door, though he didn't know what he meant to do. The woman didn't notice him at first, even as he tried to make himself evident by shutting the door firmly behind him.

"Hey," he finally said.

She cracked her eyes open and tried to regain some composure, for her own sake.

"Oh, hey," she said shyly, and rose from her place on the hall floor.

Jack shoved his hands in his pockets and stood awkwardly. "Locked out?" he asked stupidly.

"Mmm," the woman replied. "I must have lost my key at work today," she admitted shamefully.

"You can't get a hold of Chris?" he asked, referring to their landlord.

She shook her head. "It's kind of late, in case you hadn't noticed," she said, cracking the first signs of a smile. "Normal people are sleeping right now," she joked, her long brown curls sweeping in front of her face, before he hand reached out to brush them away.

Jack shifted on his feet, looking down. "Guess I'm just used to it," he replied softly, deeply. "I work a lot," he added, surprising himself for more than the first time that night.

"You and me both," she told him. "Not that I have a choice. LA is an expensive place to live," she added.

"So you're not from here then?" he assumed. This woman had an edge to her that was not Los Angeles born and bred.

"It's that easy to tell?" she asked, a slight smile crossing her mouth. "Moved here from Ohio actually," she said, surprising him.

"Ohio?" he questioned.

She rolled her eyes in response. "Don't worry; you just have the same exact reaction as everyone else out here. What… you think only farmers live in Ohio?" she asked him.

He smiled slightly, surprising himself at how at ease he felt around this stranger. "Fair enough, I suppose."

A moment of silence washed over the two- why had he come out in the hallway in the first place? He cursed at himself internally for what he was about to ask her.

"Umm," he started. "Listen, why don't you come on in?" he asked her, holding the door open in invitation. He could immediately read her apprehensive look. "Since you're stuck out in the hallway until morning," he tried.

The woman's eyes shifted warily, as if they were looking him up and down, trying to decide if, by appearance only, their owner could trust this man. "I don't even know you," she stated obviously.

"Yeah, and I don't know you either. For all I know you could rob me and hold me at gunpoint," he pointed out jokingly. He was unwinding at a marvelous pace.

The woman got up from the ground, rubbing out the creases on her jeans and grabbed her bag. "I'm Kate, by the way," she offered, walking under his arm, which was holding the door open at the top.

"Jack," he said, almost an afterthought, and they smiled at each other, almost half heartedly, awkwardly.

Kate stood inside the doorway, uncomfortable but grateful that she didn't have to sit in the hallway all night.

"Stick 'em up," she joked, but cursed herself on the inside. Could she have said anything more stupid? Thankfully he laughed, and although it may have just been a polite gesture, it suited him nonetheless.

"Sit down, go ahead," he motioned to the couch with his hands. "Unless you plan on standing up the whole night."

First Kate took in the apartment. It was decorated nicely, tastefully, but there was nothing to comment on. Every texture, every color blended into the next, every piece matched another. "Nice place," she offered. She had to admit it looked better than her own at the moment, which was the perfect place to be if you loved staring at stark white walls.

"So…" he trailed.

"Are you normally this nice to people?" she asked him, truly curious as to what would possess this man to invite a stranger into his living room.

He shrugged nonchalantly. "Maybe I trust people too much?" he questioned. "I don't know. But you looked pretty desperate," he pointed out.

Kate finally sat down on the couch, laying her bag next to her possessively. "What do you do?"

Jack always laughed at this question. It was normally one of the first questions someone new would ask; he was guilty of it as well. As if figuring out what someone did for a living really told you anything about them? Sure, he was surgeon, and it seemed to complete him, but that told someone almost nothing about the kind of heart he had, the things he believed in. So it seemed a strange formality. His ex wife was a teacher- someone he'd always thought of as nurturing, kind, and caring. That had obviously been the wrong guess.

"I'm a surgeon," he said vaguely. "What about you?" he asked her, wanting to change the subject.

"I'm a teacher," she said, throwing him off. "But I also do physical therapy. Kind of my night job," she explained.

He laughed a bit. "Overachiever," he mumbled.

"Look who's talking, Mr. Surgeon."

They'd hit the obvious point in the evening where the conversation would take one of two paths: they would keep talking, getting to know each other, or Jack would bid her goodnight, and would check on her on his way out the door the next morning.

"You're up kind of late for having to work early in the morning, huh?" he asked her, trying to carry on the conversation. There was some kind of peace he found while talking to Kate. She wasn't pushy, or questioning him, his motives. She wasn't asking him his life goals, his dreams, what he wanted to be when he was a little boy. No, they were just two people talking, and for once, he found it refreshing and welcome.

"Yeah, I teach 5th grade," she started. "So I'm usually at school before eight."

Jack nodded. He knew all about a teacher's schedule, that while they were at school for eight hours a day, their work didn't stop there. There were always piles of paper scattered around the apartment when his ex wife was there. She had stickers, lots of red pens, and always seemed stressed about whether she was teaching the children well or not.

"Well, I'll get you a blanket or something so you can sleep on the couch. Okay?" he asked her, striding past her and into another room, emerging a few seconds later with a stack of a few blankets.

"No, that's okay Jack .You don't have to let me stay. I can keep trying a few of my friends," she replied honestly. And by few, that was literal. She'd only been in LA for a week; the only people she'd gotten to know were her fellow teachers. Not that she'd be comfortable sleeping on any of their couches either- but still, friends.

Jack sighed; he somehow knew this woman would put up a fight. He glanced at his watch. "It's almost 2:30. They're not going to be your friends anymore if you call them now," he said. "Just stay, it's no big deal."

She nodded in defeat, accepting the blankets from him. "I'll be leaving around 6:30, I'll wake you up then, okay? You should be able to reach Chris by then."

"Sure," Kate replied. "And you were yelling at me for not getting enough sleep?" she joked, referring to the fact that he was facing about 3 hours of sleep until he had to get up and go to work.

"Funny," he shouted, walking into his bedroom. "Night Kate."

"Thanks again for letting me stay," she yelled to his back.

She smiled, oddly comforted by his words and caring nature. She snuggled into the couch- was it really as comfortable as it seemed? Her heavy eyelids closed and she drifted into a sound sleep, curled up in Jack's apartment. How could a stranger's home feel more so than her own?


	2. Go With the Flow

Go With the Flow

"Leave me alone," she mumbled quietly, her voice croaking with tiredness.

Jack shook his head- this was the third time he'd tried to wake Kate up, but she wasn't cooperating. She was curled into a ball on the couch, swimming in the blankets he'd given her. She'd had to sleep in her jeans, and her shirt was corkscrewed around her middle as if she'd tossed and turned in her sleep.

"Kate you have to get up or we're both going to be late for work," he said, this time louder, throwing an untied tie around his neck.

Still she gave him no response. He crouched by her, close to her face by now.

"Get up," he said again, shaking her shoulders lightly.

Suddenly her eyes popped open and she jumped, startled to find Jack so close to her. Immediately she took in his appearance- freshly shaved, yet there was still a hint of stubble, black slacks and a crisp white collared shirt, his neck adorned with a deep blue draped tie.

"Sorry," he cringed. "You're a heavy sleeper," Jack joked with her.

Her cheeks flushed with embarrassment. "Yeah, sorry. I've been told I don't wake easily."

"That's for sure. Want some coffee?" he asked her as he strode towards the kitchen where a pot was already brewing.

Kate nodded gratefully. "Love some," she bit out. "Never start my day without it."

He handed her the steaming mug. "I know the feeling. I always need a kick in the ass every morning."

They shuffled awkwardly around each other in the kitchen, Kate stirring sugar into her coffee. "Yeah, I mean you hardly get any sleep," she couldn't help but say. She knew it probably wasn't within her right, and Jack was the kind of person she'd already realized didn't take advice from anyone.

"This is true," he replied after a moment. "So, uhh, I'm going to have to get going in a few minutes. Have you tried calling Chris yet?"

Kate dug through her shoulder bag in the living room, eventually pulling her cell phone out. She dialed the number that was already stored in the phone, her face turning from hopeful to dread in a matter of seconds. "He's not answering," she mouthed.

She snapped the phone shut, sighing. "What the hell am I supposed to do?" She threw her hands up in the air then rested them on her hips. With a glance around the room she noticed Jack was no longer with her.

"Jack?" she called out.

His tall form suddenly appeared again, carrying a large rectangular box with a handle. He walked past her, his arm brushing against her side along the way.

"What are you doing?" she questioned, but nonetheless followed him out the door and into the hallway.

He was sitting on his knees in the carpeted hall, the tool box lying open before him, digging through it. "I…." he rummaged through, pausing his speech, "am going to open your door."

He'd stood up by now, wedging a tool in between the wall and door, right around the deadbolt. "Jack I don't think that's going to work, these locks are pretty strong and-" she rambled, interrupted by the uncanny sound of the bolt turning.

"What was that you were saying?" he smirked, twisting the knob and the door opening a few inches.

"Thank God," she replied, ignoring his smugness and reaching her delicate hand through the crack in the door, and with some effort, undoing the chain.

The door swung open all the way and Jack closed the tool box, standing up with his hands in his pockets. Kate rushed inside, throwing her bag down on the meager furniture in the living room.

"I hope this doesn't give you any ideas about breaking in," she smiled, almost shyly. "So, uh, thanks for everything," she mumbled, unsure of what to say to the man who'd saved her a lot of trouble.

"No problem," he winked, but berated himself inside. He didn't want to come across as a creep. "Uh, well, I guess I'm just right across the hall if you need anything else," Jack said awkwardly.

"Sure thing," she said, smiling slightly at him. Suddenly she stepped towards him, the close contact surprising him enough to take a small step backward. Her hands found their way to his neck, delicately tying his dark tie and tightening it around his neck. She adjusted the collar of his shirt, smiling when she was finished.

"Well, thanks again," Kate said softly, closing the door behind him. She rolled her eyes when he was out of site. The thing she needed the most right now was a friend, but she sure didn't do anything to make Jack want to be around her any longer than necessary.

Then again, as she thought more about it, why had he been so nice? Was that just the kind of man he was? Was there something about her that he trusted? Although he'd been very nice and hospitable towards her, she got the impression early on that he wasn't used to having anyone else around the apartment. He seemed like a lonely guy. That's what Kate was having a hard time understanding- Jack was seemingly everything anyone could ask for in a friend, or even more. He was nice, polite, even funny when he wanted to be, and he seemed to have gone out of his way to help her.

She glanced at the clock quickly. 'Shit,' she thought as she ran to the shower, stripping her clothes off along the way and hardly waiting until the water turned warm. Kate showered in record time, got as ready as she could get, and headed off to work. Her commute to the elementary school seemed as though it shouldn't take long- but LA traffic was anything but predictable and it always seemed to take her on the verge of half an hour.

Jack found himself in a different mood- though he couldn't describe what. He wasn't any happier, wasn't any nicer to anyone- he certainly wasn't walking around the hospital whistling with delight. Whatever the change was, he thought, he would accept it, because any feeling was better than how he'd been for many weeks before. Today he decided to get out of the hospital earlier than normal. He had no plans, nothing on his agenda, but Jack went with the feeling, accepted it as a welcome change in his routine.

"See ya tomorrow Dr. Shephard," a colleague called out him. He left the hospital with a wave and drove home.

When he arrived home at his modest apartment, a small yellow sticky note stared him in the face. There was neat, feminine handwriting on it, and before he'd read it he was pretty sure who it belonged to.

_Jack,_

_I'm having a few friends over for some drinks. Feel free to stop by- consider it me paying you back!_

_Kate_

He couldn't help but smile when he read it. Opening the door, he glanced at his watch- 10:14, that wasn't too late, right? In his mind he debated whether he should go across the hall to Kate's or not- would it be awkward? While she was nice to talk to, their meeting had been a bit uncomfortable. He could chalk some of it up to not knowing her well, practically not at all, but what about the rest? For once he stopped thinking, stopped analyzing and went with his gut. He needed to go out more, he told himself.

Jack changed into dark jeans and a casual t-shirt, shoving his keys and cell phone into his pockets. He knocked nervously on Kate's door, hearing several people inside. She opened it after a few moments, smiling at him. "Hey, I was hoping you'd come," she said warmly. "Come on in," Kate motioned, guiding him inside.

He immediately noticed how sparse the apartment was- a couch, a few chairs and a coffee table, but that was about it. She didn't have many personal touches, no photos or magazines, no signs that she actually _lived_ there. There were 4 other guests there- teachers he guessed.

She made the appropriate introductions, introducing Jack on more than one occasion as her 'hero neighbor' and he could only chuckle, a bit embarrassed. The atmosphere was surprisingly at ease, the 6 adults sitting around the living room drinking wine. Jack could tell immediately that he wasn't a part of their world- he didn't have many stories about hellion children, but found himself chiming in on some of his more challenging young patients.

Kate's four colleagues left shortly after Jack arrived, and he rose as they exited, prepared to leave also. She looked at him, confused. "You don't have to leave just because they did," she suggested. He just nodded in indifference. "Sit down, you look like you've had a hard day," Kate offered, sitting down across from the couch he was seated on.

"So… how was your day?" she asked him, as if she really knew him and this was just some routine they were going through.

He laughed at the awkwardness, perhaps because he could think of no other reaction. "Umm, it was okay. Just surgeries and stuff like that," he admitted nonchalantly.

"Oh yeah," she said sarcastically. "Just saved a few lives. All in a day's work," she laughed, smiling when he finally joined in.

"I don't really like talking about work. I'm there all the time," Jack explained. "And yours?" he asked politely, almost formally. It made her feel a little on edge.

She looked at him, and noticed how he wouldn't look her in the eye, how his eyes shifted across the room, seemingly along the floor. "Why are you so serious?" Kate asked him tentatively.

"I'm not," he defended himself. "I'm just tired."

Their conversation paused momentarily. "Sorry I'm such bad company," he finally told her.

A look of embarrassment crossed her face. "No, no, I didn't mean it like that," she replied. "You just look worked up, that's all." She paused. "Plus, I wouldn't have invited you over if I couldn't stand you," Kate teased.

He finally cracked a smile, and she decided she liked it. It suited his face, his grin. His features seemed to light up, his face relaxed and looked younger.

"So I don't really know much about you. But you've already slept over," he joked.

"I'm not that interesting," she tried.

"Oh, I doubt that. Everyone's got something interesting about them. Some more than others," he admitted.

"What do you want to know?" she asked him, leaning her elbows on her knees, a gesture that may have suggested she was a bit apprehensive about their new conversation.

He shrugged, crossing his leg leisurely over the other and leaning back in the couch cushions. "Whatever you want to tell me," Jack offered.

This was something she could appreciate, as she didn't like being asked for concrete answers. "Well," she started slowly. "Umm, I grew up in Ohio, but I was born in Iowa. We moved there because my mom switched jobs," she said vaguely. "My parents split up when I was pretty young, but I still had a good childhood. I had a pretty boring life, actually," she admitted, though she had kind of surprised herself at her admissions. Though they weren't interesting, they were personal.

"Why the move to LA?" he couldn't help but ask.

She shrugged. "I kind of needed a change, I guess. There's this part of me that can't stand being in one place for too long, and I just decided to make a big change. So I packed up my stuff after I'd found a teaching job out here, and I moved," she told him simply, as if picking up and moving her whole life was no big deal.

Jack shook his head and laughed lightly. "I could never do that," he admitted.

"What?"

"Pack up my whole life. Make a decision like that just because I felt like it. Not that there's anything wrong with it," he added quickly. "You have more guts than I do, that's for sure."

She looked at him with a doubtful expression in her eyes. "Yeah," she rolled her eyes. "Because slicing people open and risking your own ego, having their life literally in your hands doesn't take guts at all," she pointed out.

"It's completely different. I can come home at the end of the day, even if things didn't work out, and know that I tried my hardest. Then it's over."

"I don't think it's as simple as you're making it out to be," she argued, challenging him by staring into his dark eyes.

Jack ducked his head down after realizing her gaze. "You don't give up easily, do you?"

She simply shook her head, a smirk on her face.

"You want something to eat?" she asked him, getting up quickly and walking to the nearby kitchen.

"No, don't worry about it," he insisted. "I'll get something at my place."

Kate waved him off with her hand. "Don't be silly. I have plenty here," she held the fridge open for him to look. The bare furnishings of the apartment had led Jack to believe the fridge would be the same way- however it was stocked, packed full.

"Come take a look," she offered, and he rose from his seat on the couch.

"Jesus Kate, you feeding an army?"

She took some bread from the top of the fridge and the fixings for a sandwich. "A girl's gotta eat," she smirked. "Help yourself, don't just stand there," she teased, her long hair brushing her shoulders.

He stood next to her and they worked silently, Kate observing his skilled hands as he sliced and prepared the food. He was standing to her left, his left arm reaching out for the bread bag.

"What are these?" she asked him, grasping his strong arm by the elbow and wrist.

He laughed awkwardly. "They're tattoos, Kate," he teased.

"I know that, Mr. Funny," she deadpanned. "What do they mean?" She couldn't help but notice how the muscles in his arms flexed and strained against his t-shirt.

He brushed her off. "Oh, they're nothing. Just a little phase I went through," he explained, kind of.

She arched an eyebrow. "That's all I'm going to get, huh?"

"Yeah. That's all you're going to get," he replied, not harshly, but rather simply, to the point, almost teasingly.

They ate and made surprisingly comfortable small talk, as if they'd known each other for quite some time. Jack stood after they'd finished, shoving his hands into his pockets, a habit she'd noticed almost as soon as she'd met him.

"So I guess I'll see you later then?" he questioned. "Thanks for having me over."

"Yeah, yeah, no problem." She hesitated before asking the next question. "Listen, I'm not trying to be overbearing or anything, but I don't really know very many people here and you seem really nice," she rambled, making frantic hand motions. "Do you want to do something tomorrow night? Any chance you're not working until the wee hours of the morning?" she tried to joke, perhaps to lighten her embarrassment.

He looked a bit surprised by her question, her forwardness. "Uhh, yeah sure. I actually don't work on Fridays," he explained. "What did you have in mind?"

Kate smiled at him. "I hadn't gotten that far yet. Jesus Jack, just go with the flow, will you?" she joked.

Yeah, okay. He'd go with the flow. Just this once.

**So this is probably turning into a fic- I put it down to the point that I can't wrap up anything in a few chapters. And your previous reviews probably helped the situation! So I hope that's a good decision- now comes the hard part- figuring out what's actually going to happen! I didn't want to jump into anything too soon between Jack and Kate- so they're going to be getting to know each other for awhile. Anyways, I'll stop rambling and get to the point- I hope you enjoyed it, and please leave a review and help me out here! Your likes, dislikes, ideas for the story- whatever your little heart desires:) They'll help me find some direction with this one.**

**I think. ;)**


	3. Drive My Car

Drive My Car

She knocked on his door- it was clearly dark underneath in the crack that was visible from the outside. Kate straightened her jeans subconsciously. She'd just turned around when he didn't answer and was in the process of unlocking the tall door to her own apartment when she heard Jack's open. Her body whipped around and she juggled her possessions- she'd just gotten home from teaching and thought to check in with Jack about what they were up to that night.

The open door revealed a dark apartment, save for a small light in the kitchen, and a very tired and grumpy looking Jack standing in a pair of sweats, bare chested. Her mind whirled at the sight- and it sure was a good one, she thought. The black sweats rested low on his hips, his tight abs and chest on display, but she found herself most enamored with his developed biceps. Kate caught herself staring but luckily Jack hadn't thought anything of it. Her eyes kept glancing toward his upper arm- she now noticed that he had yet more tattoos she knew nothing about.

"Oh, hey," he almost grumbled. "What's up?" Jack asked, rubbing his eyes.

"I'm sorry," she said sincerely. "I didn't mean to wake you up." Her face scrunched up in a cringe.

He waved her off. "How were you supposed to know?" Jack suppressed a laugh at the apology written all over her face. "I sleep on Fridays," he admitted after a bit of an awkward silence.

She smiled at the comment. "Oh, so that's how you're still alive," she managed to joke. Her thin frame was now leaning against the frame of her door, and by now she'd set a few things on the floor.

Jack looked at her expectantly. "So what did you need?"

She snapped out of her unknown trance. "Oh… uhh, I was just going to see if you still wanted to do something tonight," she flushed. There was something so much more embarrassing about saying it out loud. When she'd asked him the night before while he was over at her apartment, it had been on impulse. Immediately she felt a twinge of regret- not because she didn't want to hang out with Jack, but because she didn't want to seem desperate. And judging by his reaction, she got the feeling he'd thought just that.

He nodded. "Yeah, sure thing," he said, his body starting to wake more, and for the first time realizing he was standing before her shirtless. "What do you want to do?" He knew that he said he'd go with the flow, but the organizer in him needed to know the small details.

Kate fumbled with her hands. "I don't know really. I don't know what there is to do around here," she admitted almost shyly. "My guess is everything, but that might be the problem."

Jack's hands found their way to his short cropped brown hair and rubbed over it- a nervous habit. "Do you want to grab a bite to eat or something? I could call a few friends, maybe introduce you?" he trailed off.

Somewhere deep inside of her, she felt her heart drop.

"So you can meet some more people," he explained. Kate covered her disappointment well, never allowing it to reach her face and smiled back at him.

"Uhh, yeah, that sounds great. What time are you thinking?"

He laughed lightly, and Kate could think of no other sound she enjoyed more. "You're the one who came up with the idea- you decide," he said playfully. Although she had realized by now that Jack wasn't thinking of their time together in the upcoming evening as a date, and she wasn't really sure why she had in the first place, Kate felt hope rise in her chest at his teasing attitude.

Glancing at her watch, she tried to set a timetable in her mind. "How about 7?" she asked finally.

Jack nodded at her. "Yeah that's fine. So I can drive, is that okay?"

"Not like I would know where I was going anyway," she deadpanned. She opened her door, almost relieved to now be out of the awkward situation.

"Oh, and Kate?" she heard.

"Hmm?" she asked, poking her head back around the corner.

"Dress to impress," he wiggled his eyebrows up and down, laughing at his own corniness, but mostly a little surprised by it.

It had been a while since his last relationship. He'd gone through a steady stream of girlfriends all through college, but had never really felt that deep connection with them. They were nice, all very pretty, and a few he had thought were really the ones. But inevitably, things wouldn't work out, and he found himself being the dumpee more often than not. At the time he put it on his long hours spent studying, then later on in life his long hours spent on rotation, and so on. Then he finally realized his life wasn't going to get any less hectic. He was the living price of a high demand spinal surgeon. There were times Jack wished in one way or another that he didn't possess such a gift.

Still, he'd found himself in shambles when his wife divorced him. Not necessarily because the marriage was over- he'd known that long ago, but because it was just one more thing he'd failed. One more thing to hold over his head. That's when Jack began to retreat into his own world. Sure, his friends noticed the difference, yet gave him space. Eventually they weren't really his friends anymore; just people he'd say hello to in passing, people who would fake how interested they were in his life, and vice versa. He still had a few friends around that he would occasionally do things with, but they were mostly from the hospital, so maintaining a relationship didn't require much effort. At that point Jack realized what he had said to Kate.

_'Why did I say I'd invite some friends?' _he thought, shaking his head. He pulled out his cell phone and scrolled through his contacts- tons of numbers, mostly of people he hadn't contacted since before his divorce. His eye fell to the name Keri- his rebound girl. After his divorce from Sarah she'd come into the hospital. He'd seen her before, of course, because she was a drug representative. But there was something about that day, something that made him go after her. And she was just as willing. Jack would be the first to admit that their relationship was mostly sexual at the beginning, but then he started feeling it again, the attachment. That was when he pulled back, spending more and more hours at the hospital. Because there was no way he'd let himself get pulled into another serious relationship, only for the result to be heartbreak.

Finally he reached a few names who he didn't think would be too surprised by an invitation. He called all four of them but got each voicemail. His voice wavered as he left messages, but he cursed when he hung up. Why was this happening? As it neared 7, it became clear to Jack that he and Kate wouldn't have any company. Nonetheless, it wouldn't be right to ditch Kate just because his side of the plans didn't work out. And besides, she didn't seem too keen on meeting his friends anyway, right?

She looked herself up and down in the full length mirror that was currently propped up against the wall, yet to be hung. Kate's green eyes ran over the black cocktail dress she wore- because black was always a safe choice, wasn't it? The hem fell just above her knees, the fit rather tight but flattering. The skinny straps that adorned her shoulders tended to fall down, but she still loved the dress. Paired with a pair of black heels, Kate realized she rather liked to dress up, even when she had nowhere to go. As she was fixing her hair, there was a loud knock on the door and she ran to the peephole to check Jack out. He was dressed similarly, she sighed in relief. No, not in a dress, but in a nice pair of slacks and a dress shirt. No tie this time, she smirked as she opened the door for him.

"Hey Jack," she said nervously. Her smile widened as she saw him look her up and down appreciatively.

"Am I dressed okay?" she asked timidly, and 50 more questions came to mind. Why are you so timid? Where are we going? Why do you have to be so damn attractive?

"Yeah, of course," he replied almost shyly. "You look beautiful."

Kate smiled back a thank you, and noticed how nervous, but sincere he looked when he complimented her.

"So," his voice broke into her thoughts. "Are you ready to go?"

She grabbed her purse and they strolled down the hallway together, passing a few apartment tenants along the way. Jack smiled as he and Kate passed them, attempting not to appear as unsure as he felt. Surely together they were quite the attractive duo. Kate felt a tingle on her lower back as Jack's hand grazed there in attempt to guide her outside, holding the door open in the process.

"So where are we going?" she asked coyly, taking in the sight of Jack's car as they approached. Black, shiny, sporty, exactly what she'd expect. It was expensive looking, then she noticed the BMW logo on the back and confirmed this. Still, it suited him, sleek, smart, to the point.

"Oh, you'll find out soon enough," he told her as he opened the passenger side door for her. Only then did she notice how good he looked- black slacks that looked as if they were designed for him, a very light open collared blue dress shirt that was tight around his shoulders and arms.

_'He probably doesn't even know how good he looks,' _she thought, knowing how most men tended not to care all that much. The two drove to what she could only assume was going to be a restaurant, making small talk, although it was still a little bit uncomfortable.

"So how many of your lovely friends am I going to get to meet?" she joked. "You mind?" she asked, and on his shake of head, rolled the window down a little so there was a breeze flowing through the car.

His answer was a bit delayed. "Uhh, that's the thing," Jack started. "I think it was a little too last minute for my friends. They can't come," he explained.

Luckily Kate brushed him off with a wave of her hand. "No problem. I'm sure we can manage to have fun all by ourselves," she laughed. There was something refreshing about her laugh, Jack noticed. It was true, loud, and unashamed. All in all, Kate was very real as a person from what he'd seen so far, which was quite a feat in LA. They soon arrived at a swanky looking restaurant, Jack running around to her door to open it. The valet took the car and they walked inside, Jack offering her his arm along the way. She took it gratefully, as she noticed how upscale the restaurant was.

As they entered, the hostess seemed to know who Jack was, smiling at him warmly. "How are you doing Dr. Shephard?" she asked sweetly. Kate thought it was strange to hear someone call him Dr. Shephard, when she'd only known his as Jack.

"I'm doing great Mary," he told her nicely. "And how about you? How's that son of yours?"

"Great thanks to you," she smiled. "Follow me, I'll get you two a good table," Mary smiled.

Kate glanced at him in wonder, her eyes asking him what the previous scene was all about. He just smiled lightly at her, pulling her chair out for her when they reached their table.

"I did a surgery on her son," he explained.

"You have connections everywhere, don't you?" she laughed.

"In one way or another."

An awkward silence washed over them. This night certainly felt like a date to both of them, however much they hadn't meant it to be in the first place. _'He was going to invite friends Kate,' _she told herself. _'He didn't mean for it to be a date then, why should it be now?' _She couldn't help but admonish her expectations in her mind, although Jack appeared to be just as uneasy as she was.

"So are you liking your job?" he asked her, almost politely.

"Yeah," she stumbled. "It's going to take some adjustment though. Things are just a lot different here than back home," she told him, referring to Ohio. "The others are nice I guess. It will get better," she said, practically telling herself instead of him.

He nodded in understanding, running his thumb around the edge of the empty wine glass in front of him. "I remember feeling the same way when I moved here," he told her.

She cocked her head in confusion. "I thought you were from here?"

"Nope, but I am from California. I grew up in northern California, which is completely different than around here," he explained. "I miss it," he said thoughtfully, though he wasn't sure he'd meant to.

"What, no good hospitals up there?" Kate tried to joke, attempting to lighten the conversation.

"Well I did my undergrad and my med school in New York. Columbia," he added. "Then when I was offered my job at St. Sebastian's I just felt lucky enough to be back in my home state," he offered.

"You didn't like New York?"

"No, no, I loved it actually. But you know, comfort zones and all that," he grinned sheepishly. They'd talked about the briefly when Kate had explained she just packed up everything and moved practically on impulse.

Kate could see that Jack was a very important and well known surgeon, despite his hesitance to talk about it. "But you could work practically anywhere you wanted, couldn't you?" she guessed.

He appeared a bit surprised, leaning back into his chair. "I guess," Jack replied thoughtfully.

"So why don't you?" she asked. "Why don't you move back to where you grew up if that's where you really love it?"

He smiled at her. "See, that's where you and I are different," he smirked. "It would take me a year to do anything like that," he laughed, his face scrunching up in amusement.

"Something to think about though". Their food had come by this point, and with a few glasses of wine in the both of them, they were starting to feel a bit more relaxed.

Suddenly Jack looked intently at her until her attention had been raised from her plate. "What?" she asked self consciously, paranoid that she had food on her face or something equally embarrassing.

"Kate, is this a date?" he asked her. He noticed that she blushed furiously, and he thought he probably was too. It was certainly a question they'd both been contemplating the whole night; and probably the night before too.

She shrugged, her thoughts churning in her head. "Do you want it to be?" she asked, not wanting to give herself up if he didn't return the feelings.

"It kind of seems like one," he said. They were both dancing around the real answer, afraid to be rejected.

"Okay then," she said boldly. "It's a date."

He laughed, letting his guard down seemingly completely. "I like you Kate," he said, amused. "You say what you think."

"What, you don't meet people like me often?" she asked him in the same joking tone, already knowing what the answer would be.

An hour later they were all laughed out, done with their meal. Jack pulled out his wallet, taking a credit card from one of the folds.

_'Jesus Christ, he has a black card,' _she thought. _'Why the hell does he live in the apartment he does?' _

He must have noticed her stare, but she offered to split the check anyway. "No way," he smirked. "But nice try."

"Hey Jack," she got his attention as they were walking back to the car.

"Hmm?" he replied his hands down in his pants pockets.

"Can I drive your car?" she asked, bursting into laughter.

Jack appeared confused, and let it show. "You want to drive my car?"

Kate nodded eagerly. "Yeah. I've always wanted to drive a BMW," she pleaded with him teasingly, giving him her best puppy dog eyes.

She fully expected him to say no, knowing how protective men were about their cars. "Sure, just don't get us killed," he fake threatened, holding the keys up to her after the valet had driven the car around.

Kate practically jumped up and down, and he had to laugh at how excited she got over something so small, how she allowed her emotions to shine through without any fear of how they'd be interpreted. He watched her climb into the driver's seat, adjusting the seat so she could reach the pedals. He secretly admired her smooth and athletic legs as he sat down in the passenger's seat.

She suddenly heard a chuckle as she started the ignition. "What?" she asked him.

He shook his head. "Oh, nothing. I just realized I've never actually sat in this seat before," Jack admitted.

"Maybe you should get used to it," she said flirtatiously, and for once it didn't go unnoticed by Jack. He offered her a smile back, but not much else.

Kate drove home, only scaring Jack a few times, her excitement getting the best of her occasionally. He managed to give her directions while clutching onto the bar next to his seat, watching her shift gears with determination.

"That was fun," she said simply as they walked into their apartment building.

"For you," he joked.

"No, I meant the whole night," she said, almost turning shy now.

"Oh, that," he teased her, trying to ease her although he was just as nervous. "Yeah, I had fun." This time he could actually mean it, it didn't blurt out of his mouth as a polite formality as it had so many times before.

He noticed she wrung her hands in front of her. "So…"

"So I'll see you later then I guess?" he said lamely. Why did he have so much trouble saying what he wanted to say?

"Yeah," she replied, an almost certain look of disappointment appearing on her features. "Remember I'm just right across the hall," she tried to joke.

"Good night Kate," he said sincerely, leaning in to peck her on the cheek. She drew her breath in, a bit surprised at the action after his less than stellar offer of "see you later." His stubble grazed briefly over her rosy cheek and he pulled away, retreating to his apartment after another goodbye.

Well, he certainly was a gentleman.

**Please leave a review and let me know what you think!**


	4. Erase Replace

**I've never gotten as many reviews for a chapter as last- so thanks to everyone who was wonderful enough to do so! Please continue and let me know what you think of this chapter!**

Erase Replace

"So I hear you were on a date last night," his mother Margo Shephard told him, almost accused him.

The pair was sitting down to lunch, like they almost always did on Saturday afternoons. It had become a bit of a tradition, especially since Jack's dad, Christian had passed away the year before. Surprisingly enough, Margo had settled down better than expected. While she was still very forward and unafraid to confront Jack about anything, he'd noticed his mother's edges softening with age.

He scraped his fork along his plate, debating what he could actually tell his mother, since he was a bit confused himself. "Jack stop that, you'll scratch the plate" she harped and he put his fork down, opting to scrunch his napkin in his lap instead.

"Who told you?"

She gave him a hazardous glance. Didn't he know how many connections she had? "Rosemary Evans was at the restaurant last night. I saw her at the league breakfast this morning," she said airily. "She said you two looked like you got along famously."

"Umm, yeah I guess." What was he supposed to tell his mother? She'd never even managed to find out about Keri, and she'd been around for several months, but on his first date with Kate the "relationship" was out in the open.

"So who is she?"

He chuckled in nervousness. Jack felt as though he was being interrogated, although that wasn't uncommon with his mother. Usually they stuck to a set of topics, because usually that's all there was to discuss. His life hadn't had any changes in it lately, and that was one thing his mother had oddly been respectable enough not to bring up.

"Just a neighbor. She just moved in," he explained.

Margo nodded and took a sip from her water glass. "Are you trying to get back into dating Jack?"

He shook his head. "No, it just kind of happened," he admitted. That much was true. "She was locked out one night so she uhh, stayed at my place." He wanted to cringe at the last sentence, knowing how his mother would surely interpret it.

"Just don't get her knocked up," she retorted, rolling her eyes.

"Mom we've only gone out once. You don't need to worry about it," he said patiently, wanting to roll his eyes right back at her. His mother required a certain amount of patience that he sometimes just didn't possess.

Margo wrung her hands together in expectancy. "Well, keep me updated," she said, although they were both fully aware she'd find ways to be updated regardless if it was coming from Jack or one of her many friends and acquaintances in LA.

Jack left his mother's house early that afternoon, a covered dish in his hand like always. She seemed to think him incapable of feeding himself since his divorce, although it had been over a year since it was finalized. He supposed in some ways she was right, there was a certain lack of motivation in taking care of himself, and she was only right in trying the little things. He ran a few errands on his way home, but found his night with Kate on his mind quite a bit. He'd had a great time with her- which was harder than if he hadn't. She lived right across the hall, there was no way that they could have a wonderful date and him not get in contact with her. Secretly in his mind, Jack wished to fail at some things, just so he wouldn't have to deal with them, wouldn't have to follow through. But what he wanted to finish, wanted so desperately never seemed to come. He always deserted, always failed at the things he was expected to do well at- marriage, family relationships, friends…

When he got home, he found another note from Kate, this time slipped underneath the door and just inside. It was another sticky note, but this time on a bright flower shaped piece of paper. She was so easy to peg as a teacher, Jack thought.

_Hey Jack,_

_Chris stopped by my place looking for you. He said he couldn't get through to you on your cell but it sounded kind of important…_

_Had fun last night!_

_Kate_

He scowled when he finished- what could Chris want? Jack always paid his rent on time, was never much of a bother with repairs, didn't trash the place. He found Chris' number in his phone and called- no answer. Letting his curiosity get the best of him, he strode across the hall and knocked on Kate's door.

She answered a minute later in grey sweats, her hair thrown back into a messy ponytail. She was holding a spoon up to her mouth, a guilty look on her face.

"Oh. I thought you were going to be the pizza guy," she said, a flush coming to her face. "Come on in though." She held the door open for him. Jack noticed that now the living room was scattered with boxes, piles everywhere. "Sorry about the mess."

"Unpacking sucks," he laughed. It was good to see that she owned more than it looked like earlier- there were now picture frames, candles, coffee table books scattered around, and although they had no place now, he could see Kate had intentions. Seeing the boxes reminded of the last time he had to pack- Sarah's things, at that.

His hands shoved inside the pockets of his jeans, never going unnoticed by Kate. "I saw your note," he felt the need to explain. "I couldn't get a hold of him. Do you know what was up?"

Kate shook her head, throwing things off the couch so he'd have a place to sit. She motioned with her hands for him to sit down. "Something like if you'd made your mind up yet about renewing your lease. I don't really know."

"I wish he'd stop bothering me about that," he thought out loud.

She frowned. "Are you thinking about moving?"

Jack shrugged. "Not really sure. I was thinking about getting something a little closer to the hospital."

To his surprise she laughed. "Jack you're there practically all the time. The last thing you need is to be closer," she pointed out. Her point really focused on the differences between them, although they still didn't know each other well. While he was thinking convenience, less of a drive every morning, she was thinking about time, distancing him from the work that consumed his life.

"Well I do get Fridays and Saturdays off," he offered. "So I'm not there _all_ the time," he said sarcastically.

"You work at least 14 hours a day 5 times a week buddy."

There was a knock on the door and Kate got up to answer, grabbing a wad of cash off the counter beforehand. She brought the steaming pizza back in a moment later.

"Thank God. I'm starving." He chuckled as she pulled a few large pieces out of the box. "Want some?"

"I just ate. No thanks," Jack tried.

Kate cocked her head to the side. "Who in their right mind can resist pizza?"

"I never said I was sane," he joked, but nonetheless pulled a slice from the box, if anything to satisfy her. Right then he decided that forcing food on people was a particularly female trait- every woman he'd ever known had been that way, now that he thought about it.

"So what are you up to today?"

"Not sure. I don't do well with free time. I don't know what to do with myself," he admitted.

"Well I have a whole apartment to paint if you want to help," she joked with him.

"Sure," he offered.

"Jack I was just kidding," she said, embarrassed. "God, you've already let me stay at your place, unlocked my door, took me out to dinner, let me drive your car," Kate listed off.

It was no use arguing with him. "It's no problem. I need something to pass the time."

They finished eating and Kate dragged the paint buckets out from the second bedroom. She was immediately thankful that Jack was around when she realized that even with the boost from a step stool, she wasn't nearly tall enough to tape off the crown molding, and wouldn't be able to paint the top of the wall, either. Jack easily had 8 inches on her in height.

"Uhh, I'm going to go change clothes. I'll be right back," he said when they'd finished preparing the room. He returned a few moments later, now dressed in mesh shorts that hit below the knee and an old Columbia t-shirt. Kate immediately decided that although he looked wonderful in a pair of slacks, she liked the no frills Jack better. His choice of attire made him look like a relaxed college student, as if he should be planted in front of his TV playing video games.

For once there was a comfortable air of silence around them, probably because they both knew they were in the same frame. They both knew they'd been on date, had a great time with each other. Kate glanced to her left and watched him move the roller up and down the wall gracefully, efficiently, noticing his tattoos again. There was something so intriguing about them, and her curiosity wouldn't let them go.

"I got most of them in med school," he mentioned, as if he could read her mind. "I wanted to rebel," he laughed.

"Everyone goes through that."

He turned to her. "Oh yeah? What did you do?" he asked, amused.

She waited a moment before she answered, then pulled her shirt up in the back. "The same thing," she smirked, showing off the tattoos that adorned the backside of her hip. To his surprised, Jack found himself reaching out for her waist, as if to hold her still so he could examine though.

Kate almost jumped at the touch, his large hands grasping her easily. She noticed his intense stare at the pictures. "I don't suppose you'll tell me what yours mean," he teased finally. In a way it surprised him that Kate had tattoos- she looked so polished, so put together, not someone who would normally be thought of as having ink. Although, he thought, that's probably what people thought when they saw his, too.

"Sometime," she promised, flashing him a grin.

They got back to painting, Jack finishing the tops where she couldn't reach. "This color suits you," he mentioned finally.

The walls were now drying a fiery red that had the potential to border on gaudy, but managed to look great against her existing furniture and the decorations that were making their way slowly out of packing boxes.

"Hmm? Why's that?" she asked a tad absent mindedly.

"I don't know, I guess it's just really vibrant, really real."

She laughed. "I'll take that as a compliment."

"I actually just got another," he said vaguely, confusing her.

Seeing her look, he pulled his t-shirt over his head. As if the site of his strong back wasn't distracting enough, Kate was now face to face with a stark black block of script.

"What does it say?" She squinted, trying to decipher what was obviously another language.

"It's Latin."

Kate put a hand on her hip. "And?"

"And I got it to get over some stuff," he smiled.

For some reason Jack found himself wanting Kate, wanting more than he'd previously thought. There was some sort of connection he found with her. It was peaceful, understanding, fun, so _genuine_. All things he needed more of in his life.

The pair finished the living room and decided to stop there, being as the room was large.

"Ugh, my shoulders are killing me," Kate complained, falling onto the couch.

Jack sunk in next to her, closer than he intended probably, but he didn't move either. "Face the wall," he told her, chuckling when she looked at him, puzzled. "Just do it," he persuaded her gently.

She jumped when his fingers sank into the tight muscles across her shoulders, then relaxed into the heavenly feeling.

"Oh my God, you're amazing," Kate encouraged him.

"You know what they say about doctors having good hands," he smirked, his breath hitting her neck.

She turned around suddenly, acting on impulse, settling her lips against his, feeling his light scruff rub against her face. He hesitated against her, but finally returned the kiss, his lips grazing against hers, slow and sweet. Her heart fluttered with jitters, but it felt right, good. He noticed how soft her lips felt against his and nipped at them slowly. She pulled away from him and smiled, noticing that his eyes were dancing over hers and his hands still resting lightly on her hips.

"Thanks for the massage," she stated coyly, smiling widely at him.

For more than the first time that day Jack found himself surprised. He had to appreciate her ability to act impulsively; although he was sure it got her in trouble too. But he figured she got the things she wanted, too. It was a give and take. He could think of nothing more than to smile back at her, feeling his lips tingle from the electricity of the kiss they'd just shared. It was almost innocent, but very telling of how much they both wanted it.

Kate flicked on the TV as if nothing had just happened, resting her back into the couch and settling her eyes on the screen before them. Before she'd kissed him he noticed the light freckles that scattered her cheek bones and the bridge of her nose, the way her green eyes somehow seemed to light up when she got excited, the goofy but endearing way her face scrunched up when she laughed hard. He draped his arm over the back of the couch and eventually Kate moved against him, their sides pressing together warmly, fully. He smiled at the contact although it felt strange. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd been kissed, the last time he hugged someone. It had to have been when he was with Keri- but none of those times stuck out in his mind like this one did. But more, he couldn't remember the last time he'd been connected with anyone emotionally. He supposed it was with Sarah.

It wasn't fair to compare Kate to Sarah, really. For starters, he barely knew Kate, but he'd also found that he barely knew Sarah either, despite thinking he had. But this was a game that he always played in his mind, comparing the new girl to others. He wanted to test the waters again with Kate, to see if maybe the things he'd felt previously were the result of shock.

He pressed his mouth against her cheek lightly, feeling her turn her head toward him. He captured her lips with his own at that moment, running over them once again. She moved her hands to his either side of his face and to the back of his head and responded. His fingers danced lightly underneath her knees where her legs were bent up towards her chest on the couch. She was a great kisser, he decided, soft but firm somehow, not overly aggressive, just the right touch. Experimentally he ran his tongue lightly over her bottom lip, testing her reaction. Kate's mouth opened against his and reached out to his tongue with hers, twirling them together deliriously. It sent a whole new shock through him, and he decided these feelings weren't a one time thing.

But that could be the problem.


	5. The Beautiful Letdown

**Yes, I'm alive! Finals week was awful, let me tell ya :)**

The Beautiful Letdown

How did that happen? He could he have _let_ that happen? Jack's mind was swirling with thoughts, even a week after his last encounter with Kate. Jack couldn't stop picturing it in his mind; Kate sitting in front of him on the couch, and then before he knew it her lips were on his and he found himself kissing her back. He'd be lying if he said he didn't enjoy it, didn't respond to her, but he couldn't allow himself to go down the path again. The path that, in all of his experiences, only lead to hurt and broken promises.

He'd left Kate's that day an hour or two later- fumbling with excuses and surely leaving her confused. When he stepped out into the hallway, he felt the dread seep into his body, the dragging feeling that he'd made yet another mistake. Jack stopped his pity party, snapping out of it when he was paged over the loud speaker at the hospital. Sighing at the request, but mostly wondering why they didn't page him on his beeper, he made his way to the nurse's station. When he arrived he was handed a chart and filled in on the case of a young patient with a life threatening spinal cord injury. Suddenly it hit him that nothing seemed to faze him anymore- hearing about a little eight year old kid possibly not ever being able to walk again brought him to almost no reaction, other than that he had a job to do. When had he gotten like this- and how?

Jack excused himself and went to a secluded area to review the chart more intensely and prepare his surgery for that afternoon. As he was scribbling down notes on the bright paper before him, it suddenly hit him. He cared about what happened with Kate, and even if it was selfish in the fact that he was worrying about _himself_, at least it was something. At least he cared about _something_ now.

When he'd said his goodbyes to Kate on Saturday, neither of them had mentioned much about getting together again, but they didn't feel they had to since they lived just across the hall from each other. He wasn't dense enough to think that Kate wasn't expecting more after sharing their kiss. If he were normal, he thought to himself, she would get just that. The fairytale dating story- he would sweep her off her feet and they'd live happily ever after.

That's what Sarah had expected, and that's what he gave her. Jack treated her like the best, gave her the best, swept her off her feet, loved her, and she loved him. And they lived happily- just not ever after. He'd been fooled once before, and if he knew anything about himself it was that he was seemingly destined to repeat his mistakes.

Across the city, in a now empty classroom, Kate Austen sat at her desk looking over the desk sized calendar that lay in front of her. Her class was out at recess and she welcomed the peacefulness that the event brought. She'd been having an off day, and something told her that even the children noticed through her teaching. She jumped from her seat when she felt her cell phone vibrate in her pocket. She flipped it open casually, not recognizing the number.

"Hello?"

"Katherine Austen please," a kind voice asked her.

"This is she. May I ask who's calling?" The call seemed to be about business, not pleasure.

"This is Glenda from Los Angeles County Medical Education," she paused, hoping that Kate would recognize the organization.

Kate frowned into the phone. "Is there something you need?" she asked tentatively.

"I'm just calling to remind you that you're required to get your flu shot before the 14th-"

"Oh yeah. God I totally forgot, I'll get it done." They'd had a staff meeting about a week before and the principal had reminded all of the teachers then, but it had slipped her mind between getting her apartment settled and adjusting to the new school, amongst other things.

Glenda, who was a talking a little too cheerily about flu shots for Kate's liking, finished explaining all of the protocol before hanging up. Unexpectedly the name of the hospital shot through her mind- St. Sebastian's- Jack's hospital. She had to go there if she wanted the school's insurance to cover the costs. Kate soon brushed it off, thinking that the chances of running into him were slim. She'd just swing by after school today and see if they could squeeze her in.

Later that afternoon she walked aimlessly through the halls of the daunting hospital. Kate thought she'd followed the signs correctly, but stopped when she saw more signs ahead of her. A tall man in scrubs whisked by her and her breath caught in her throat. He hadn't seen her, but it was Jack. She ducked into a doorway, hoping that he'd be out of view soon. She wasn't ready to face him after Saturday- she wasn't sure if she'd been too aggressive. And moreover, she didn't want to make it seem like she was stalking him… With that thought she turned around and walked briskly back in the direction she'd came from, determined to escape him. Several hallways later she stopped at an information desk, asking where to get her flu shot.

By that time Jack was walking down that particular hall, and had practically reached Kate before noticing she was there. He sidestepped quickly and watched her interact with the nurse who was helping her. She waved thanks to the nurse and set off in a different direction and he sighed a breath of relief at the narrow miss.

"Dr. Jack?"

"Hmm?" he asked absentmindedly.

"What's wrong?" his patient asked him.

Jack smiled at the young boy and shook his head. "Nothing. Don't you worry about it," he teased.

"Am I gonna have my surgery now?" the little boy asked him, his eyes wide and teary, his voice shaking.

His patient was drugged up to the high heavens to control his pain, but was completely lucid, and like any other patient, terrified. "Yeah, you are," he said kindly. "Let's go find your mom, huh?"

The little boy smiled back up at him, his large, brown puppy dog eyes staring back at him. He really reminded Jack of himself at that age, and for the first time in quite awhile, he found himself nervous before one of his surgeries.

Jack returned home several hours later, tired, but happy that the little boy's surgery had gone as well as it did. He walked into the lobby and pushed the button for the elevator, rubbing his tired eyes in his hands. There was a crinkling sound next to him all of a sudden, and when he looked over he saw her bent over, struggling with grocery bags. At first he hadn't been sure it was Kate but as the woman was turned around and he took in her soft brown curls and the curve of her hips, he was sure it was her. It would've been easy to walk away, to get into the elevator when the doors opened but he found himself taking the few steps in her direction.

"Let me help you," he said softly, picking up a few bags from the floor.

"Oh, thanks so-" she started, then turned around and saw him. "Much," she muttered.

"Hey," he mustered.

Kate smiled shyly at him. "Hey."

They walked towards the open elevator, Jack keeping the doors from closing while she walked on. "So how have you been?" she asked him, this time a bit louder, more confident.

He cleared his throat if only to buy some time. "Busy. And you?"

"Same."

Silence prevailed and the only thing heard in the elevator was the dinging as they moved floor to floor. They stepped off and Jack waited while Kate unlocked her door.

"Thanks for helping me," she offered, smiling at him.

"I guess I'll see ya around then?"

She nodded toward him, and he couldn't miss the disappointment in her eyes. He turned back around, already regretting what he was about to say.

"Do you want to come over; maybe we can have dinner or something?" He felt as though he owed her something for completely avoiding her at the hospital earlier.

"Are you sure?" she teased a moment later.

"6:30," he told her. "And I'm cooking."

Kate looked a bit surprised. "K. I'll see ya then."

She yelled back at him just when he'd shut his door. "I'm a vegetarian!"

Jack cursed himself. He could cook, but hadn't in awhile. But even more, he'd just invited Kate over when all he'd told himself all week contradicted that. Luckily he'd gone shopping the day before, so he had plenty of food to cook with. His apartment was also fairly clean- he had barely ever being home to blame for that.

He always found cooking gave him time to think- perhaps that was why he didn't anymore. It was too much of a catalyst to mull over his now pathetic life. He turned on the TV to a football game, hoping that the noise would provide a distraction since he couldn't exactly uninvite her. Surprisingly he found himself laughing when he put the pasta on the stove- somehow Kate being a vegetarian didn't surprise him one bit. Partly because he'd noticed she was full of surprises. She arrived a bit early, dressed casually but looking great in a pair of jeans and a black top.

"So what are you making?" she asked curiously as she sat at the kitchen bar, her feet tapping on the front legs of the stool.

"It's a surprise." He winked at her, and every time he did something remotely forthcoming he found his mind scrutinizing him. But his heart- his heart told him something different.

She squealed when he sat the pasta on the table and he couldn't help but laugh at how cute she was. She was eating before he'd even sat down, praising him before he'd had the chance to taste it.

"How many more secret talents do you have?" she joked.

He feigned innocence. "What do you mean?" he smirked.

Kate rolled her eyes and thought. "Locksmith, doctor, chef, masseur, painter…" she trailed off.

"I'm full of surprises." It concerned Jack at how easy it was to talk with Kate, how easily their banter ensued. "How's teaching going?"

She hesitated. "It's getting better. I really love my kids," she admitted. "I just hope I'm doing okay."

He nodded back at her. "That's what Sarah was always worried about too. I'm sure you're doing fine," he smiled, and then realized what he'd blurted out of his mouth.

"Sarah?" Shit, that wasn't supposed to happen, he thought. Jack tried not to think about her at all, let alone speak of her. Kate noticed him flush at the mention and saw how uncomfortable he became.

"Jack?" He remained silent, mulling over his thoughts. Should he lie, tell her Sarah was just a friend, or take the plunge and admit the truth?

"Uhh," he started. "My ex-wife," he admitted softly. Strangely it felt good to say it out loud, like he was really starting to move on with his life now. He'd just _told_ another woman about his ex-wife.

Kate blinked her eyes in surprise, but tried to mask it quickly. After all, it wasn't that uncommon to be divorced. It was at that point she realized she knew almost nothing about Jack, yet she knew enough to know she liked him, his personality, his kindness.

"Oh," was all she could come up with. Their conversation muted and Kate struggled to come up with something to overcome the awkwardness.

Instead, Jack spoke. "So I have something to confess."

"Something else?" she tried to joke, and luckily he laughed along with her.

He rubbed his palms together as his elbows rested on the table. "I saw you at the hospital today." He cringed, thinking she'd be upset that he didn't at least say hi.

Instead she giggled, thinking how silly it was for two people to ignore each other because things were a little awkward and undefined.

"What?" he interrupted her thoughts.

"I saw you too," Kate admitted, seeing humor wash over his warm eyes. "I didn't want you to think I was a stalker."

Jack scoffed humorously at her admission. "So what's your story?" she asked him.

He fumbled with his words. "I guess I was just nervous."

"Fair enough," Kate agreed. "Let's not do that again, okay?" she teased.

"Yeah."

They finished their meal and moved over to the couch, each with a glass of wine.

"That was _so_ good, Jack. I might have to come up with more excuses so you'll cook for me." She smiled at him, and he could swear he felt her stare all the way down to his toes, tingling its course down his body.

She sat next to him, closer than he would've thought, but he realized she didn't have the inhibitions, the boundaries that he did. She faced him, propping an arm up on the top of the couch. "So…"

Jack laughed awkwardly, nervously as the first wave of silence washed over them. He looked down at his hands, feeling like an insecure teenager again. He closed his eyes when he felt her presence move closer, felt her body heat against his. He knew what was coming, knew that he shouldn't let it happen, but he couldn't force himself to stop her. She grasped his forearms and stroked them lightly with her thumbs as she hovered close to his lips, finally pressing them softly against his. He couldn't deny how good it felt, how comforting such a simple act was. So he let it happen, let his lips run over hers, let the shivers run down his spine, let his hands pull her tight against him.

He deepened the kiss and tangled his hands in her hair, weaving his tongue with hers in an almost lazy manner that sent shocks through the both of them. She responded so eagerly to him, resting her hands flat on his chest in full contact. He let it continue longer than he should have, his brain told him. He pulled away suddenly, at an unnatural point in the kiss. Kate opened her eyes against him and he felt her eyelashes flutter against his cheeks. Backing away a few inches, he apologized.

"I can't Kate. I'm sorry," he croaked out.

"What?" she whispered in confusion. "What's wrong?"

He sat up a bit. "It's not you," he tried, realizing what a horrible line it was.

"Apparently it is," she retorted, not angrily, but sharply. "Why would you even ask me over here Jack? Why ask me over if you can't even kiss me?"

"I want to," he broke. "You have no idea how much I want to be able to."


	6. If We Have To

If We Have To

_"I want to," he broke. "You have no idea how much I want to be able to."_

_"Then why can't you just let yourself?"_

Kate had left without another word, and he jumped when he heard her door slam loudly on the other side of the hallway. She had every right to be angry, he thought. How long was a woman supposed to let herself be strung out and essentially used?

Jack hadn't tried to stop her from leaving- he'd stopped plenty that day. He was the reason she was leaving angry. The incident had taken place just a few days ago, and he was sure it was just as fresh on her mind as it was his. Jack knew he should explain himself, explain to Kate why he felt the way he did. Not that she would accept it, not that it would make his actions okay, but maybe, and just maybe she'd understand what made him this way.

The guilt washed through his mind almost constantly and Jack found himself distracted, wrapped up in it all. Essentially this was the problem- that he'd let himself get so attached to someone, to the idea of something more with Kate. He knew why he was so attracted to her, to that laugh, that smile, the sweetness that prevailed over her. Yet she had this edge that really sucked him in, this sharpness to her that made Kate everything he _should _want, but wouldn't allow himself to. Not yet, and maybe not ever.

The urge to explain it to her was too overwhelming now- he had to find her. He walked across the hall, not caring that he was wearing a ratty t-shirt and a pair of jeans with holes in them. He knocked loudly, hearing the echoes in the confines of the hallway and realized that this action was only adding fuel to the fire. He was still attached even when he did everything he could not to be. She didn't answer but he didn't feel as though she was ignoring him. He hadn't heard any sounds close to the door. With a sigh he decided something. He would wait.

And wait.

And the next time he glanced down at his watch Jack noticed that an hour had passed. Thoughts of giving up came frequently but he understood that finding Kate would be the only way she would see him, let alone talk to him. A half hour later Jack had resorted to drawing distracted patterns into the dark carpet beneath him, lost in his thoughts and zoned out. As he was writing the K in his name, he saw a shadow sprawl onto the floor. Hesitantly he glanced up. For how long he'd sat there, he sure hadn't thought of anything good to say when Kate showed up.

"Could you move please? I need to get inside," she said a bit sarcastically.

He rose from his feet and rubbed his hands on his jeans, suddenly very nervous. She was wearing nice jeans and a button up top- casual Friday, he thought. Her hair was in loose curls like it almost always was when he saw her.

"Umm, hey."

She stared at him as if he had more to say.

"What are you doing here?"

"Uhh, I just needed to, uhh, talk to you," he stuttered. "To explain the other night."

"Ahh. I think you explained yourself enough." She looked hurt.

By then Kate had unlocked the door and was pushing it open. It was now or never, he thought, unless he wanted to be shut out.

"Wait," he told her, grasping her forearm with his hand and pulling her gently back to him. "You won't even let me explain?"

She dropped her bags inside the door and stepped back outside. "I don't need you to explain it to me twice, Jack. I got it."

"I'm not trying to rub it in or anything," he insisted, trying his best to keep his tone gentle. "I feel really bad about what happened."

"What?" she retorted. "About practically shoving me out your door?"

Jack twisted his hands together, tempted to shove them deep in his pockets as he normally did, but fought off the urge. It was time to change.

"No… about leading, uhh, leading you on. Or maybe that's the wrong way to say it," he muttered. "Look, I told you about my ex wife. Not on purpose, but it just came out and I guess what I'm trying to get at is that I'm still messed up from that."

Kate's glare softened a bit and he felt some sense of triumph run through his body.

"That doesn't make it okay though," she pointed out. He knew she'd react like this.

Jack nodded, running his hands through his short hair. "I know it doesn't. But I fell so hard for Sarah. It felt like this in the beginning," he admitted, taking her hands into his in front of them. "That's why I pulled away. That's why I'm acting like this."

Kate stared down at her feet but removed herself from blocking the doorway, signaling for him to come in.

"You know I'm not her though. It's not really fair to compare me to her." He sat awkwardly on the couch as Kate sat beside him, a bit distant.

"It's not. But Sarah leaving me- it dug deep. I haven't been the same since, and I can't just set myself up for that again." He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees.

She was silent for awhile, but staring directly at him. He refused to look at her, and she finally spoke.

"You think I've never been heartbroken?"

"That's not the point-"

"Yeah Jack, it is. I'm not trying to prove you wrong, really. But if you think everyone finds their soul mate or whatever the first time around, you've got it twisted."

Jack turned toward her, finally. "Sarah and I were married. And she just left. You think I'm just supposed to get over it?"

"Yeah," she said boldly. "You can't feel sorry for yourself forever. Believe me."

He sighed. "Well, maybe this makes me weak, but I just can't seem to get over it."

Kate felt bad for what she'd said now. She still believed it, yes, but perhaps she was a little harsh towards what was obviously a sensitive subject.

"I was engaged," she started, meeting his surprised eyes. "Uhh, he broke it off with me about six months ago."

"Oh."

"Jack, we were together for over three years. How do you think that felt? When I came home, to the home we shared and found all of my stuff packed up?"

The fact that this bitter end to her engagement was only a few months ago shocked Jack. His divorce from Sarah had been finalized for well over a year, and they'd been apart for much longer. Kate seemed to be coping much better than he.

"I'm sorry Kate, I didn't know." He didn't know what to say.

She shook her head. "No, I didn't bring it up to make you feel bad. I just wanted you to see that I've been through something like that too. Maybe I'm not over it, maybe I'm just fooling myself, but I'm trying to move on with my life."

He shot her a wry smile. "See, that's where we're different."

Kate moved closer to him, her body shifted towards his in a way that forced Jack to look at her.

"Why do you think I moved all the way out here?" She paused. "I needed a change. I needed to get away from everything that reminded me of him."

His heart practically broke again when he saw the tears forming in her eyes. She was trying to move on- why couldn't he?

"Just promise me you'll try?" She was hopeful. "This isn't really about me anymore, Jack. It's about you and letting yourself heal. It's hard, but life is much better when you're not wallowing all the time." She tried to imply lightness towards the end.

It was then that Jack realized how strong Kate was. She'd been left too, but here she was in front of him, in a whole different life. Why had he wasted so much of his time feeling sorry for himself, overanalyzing every aspect of his relationship with Sarah when he couldn't do anything to change it? He made a conscious note in his mind to think of Kate and her situation whenever he wanted to feel sorry for himself. She was in a situation similar to his, only they had chosen opposite ends in the spectrum of healing. Kate let herself feel it, and then tried to move on. Jack only did the former.

"You didn't have to tell me all that," he pointed out quietly, placing his hand on top of hers.

She nodded. "I know. You didn't have to tell me about Sarah either, even if you didn't mean to."

"I'll try," he said a moment later. It brought a smile out of Kate, and eventually out of Jack himself. It felt good just to _say_ it.

"Come here you big softie," she joked with him, holding her arms out to him. Jack accepted gratefully, wrapping his arms around her and squeezing tightly, pulling her against him.

She felt her stomach turn when he sighed out a breath and she relished the feeling of being in his arms. Kate could feel his breath against her shoulder and it sent chills down her back. She wished it didn't. Her mind churned with the news he'd brought her. The fact that he'd tracked her down to explain why he acted the way he did told her a lot about Jack. He really wasn't trying to hurt her, but now they had to try and just be friends. How could that work?

Kate pulled away eventually, when his skin against hers became too overwhelming to her. He smiled sadly at her.

"Can we still be friends?" Kate laughed at the cliché line, but nodded, smiling widely when he added, "for now at least?"

Jack tried to joke with her, tried to let her know that he was still really attracted to her, but couldn't go there. "Cause you know, when I'm all better you'll be the first on my wish list." He grinned at her, suddenly with a much more positive outlook on his life. "Although you'll probably be snatched up by then. I'll be smacking myself for this later," he laughed.

Kate paused, not sure how much she should bring up now. "Can we still hang out and stuff?" she asked hopefully. "Cause I'm still not exactly overloading on the friends front." She blushed at the admission, but was really more curious as to how they'd act as just friends.

He nodded graciously. "Of course. I wouldn't want to lose you completely." He smiled at her, that smile that seemed to light up his face. It made her that much more attracted to him. This was going to be hard.

"So now that we're just friends, I can have burping contests with you and never wear makeup, right?" He laughed at her.

"I think you're beautiful anyway, Kate." Kate's face turned a light crimson color and she had to turn her head away from him to avoid embarrassment.

Her hand reached across the barrier of pillows that now rested between them and she swatted him lightly on his arm. "I don't think just friends works like this."

"Okay," he said with his hands up in the air, feigning innocence. "No more compliments."

"Now I didn't say that. A girl likes to be told she's looks nice once in awhile," she hinted.

"Fine I'll just grunt and nod then."

She rolled her eyes and flicked on the TV. After they had been watching for a few minutes, Jack laughed audibly at her inability to sit still.

"Want something to eat?" she finally asked, getting up from the couch.

He hated to tell her this, after he'd just gotten back into her good graces. "Actually I have to head out. My mom is forcing me to go shopping with her." He stopped and rolled his eyes, noticing her confusion. "She thinks I can't dress myself or something."

"Ahh. So you have that kind of mother," she replied from the kitchen.

Jack really didn't want to leave her, now that he had someone who understood him. "Hey, what do you have planned in the next few hours?"

"My TV and I have a date," she joked, pulling some grapes out of the fridge.

Jack strode over to the kitchen. "Come with me," he blurted out. "You know, since we're just friends. No pressure."

It would be a test to their friendship, that was for sure, she thought. But going out with Jack and his mother? If meeting his mother didn't prove they could be friends, she wasn't sure what would.

"Sure," she said confidently.

"Great, I'll tell her you're coming so she doesn't grill you. She kind of knows we went out once…" he trailed off. "Anyway, she'll be here within the next half hour, is that enough time for you?"

Kate nodded towards him and he left with a grin. She wanted to slam her head against the cabinets, yelling at herself audibly for what she'd agreed to.

But, she thought to herself, she had to prove that they could be friends- just friends.

**Hmm. How long will the 'just friends' thing last? Does it make sense to you? Your thoughts on the chapter would be fantastic :)**


	7. How's It Going To Be?

**I'm really busy with the holidays and everything, but I promise I'm trying! Let me know if you like it, since this was harder to write than I thought it would be. And as always, thanks so much for your previous reviews...**

How's It Going To Be?

"Why is she coming?" Jack's mother whispered harshly towards him. He laughed, not quite sure why Margo was whispering, as they were in the confines of Jack's apartment and Kate surely couldn't hear their conversation from across the hall.

"I thought the two of you were dating? You've never let me meet someone so soon." Margo strode to the fridge and pulled a chilled bottle of water from inside, cracking it open and taking a sip.

"We're not dating anymore. It was only one time," he tried to point out neutrally.

Just then there was a knock on his door and he knew it had to be Kate. He'd told her to come over a few minutes ago, foolishly thinking he'd be able to explain their situation to his mother in a matter of minutes. He was wrong, like usual, when it came to his mother.

"I'll get it," she told him proactively, opening the door with a grand gesture, smiling at Kate when she saw her.

Jack wanted to diffuse the situation quickly- he knew how well Margo tended to get along with other females and with other people, for that matter. He rested his hand lightly on Kate's back, leading her into the apartment.

"Kate, this is my mom, Margo. Mom, this is Kate," he said, making the obvious introductions.

"Nice to meet-"

"So you don't like my son enough to date him?"

Kate looked taken aback and she was instantly flustered from Margo's words.

"Umm, no that's, that's not…" she fumbled with her words.

"Mom," he stressed, telling her in one word to back off.

His mother put her hands on her hips, looking Kate up and down. "Well then, what is it?"

Kate regained her confidence and spoke. "Actually, your son here is the one who has the problems," she said lightly. "Told me we're better off just being friends." Kate winked at Jack at the statement, hoping that her ways would go over well against his mother.

Margo smiled almost devilishly, liking Kate's truthfulness. "He always was a fool," she joked with her son.

Jack intervened. "Let's get going then," he tried.

Kate stopped him, holding him by the arm. "I don't think so… I need to see this wardrobe of yours before you ask me for my expertise."

"Follow me dear," Margo drawled, surprising Kate and grabbing her by the hand lightly, dragging her behind her to what she could only assume was Jack's room. She hadn't seen it, even when she'd spent the night when they'd first meet, and she definitely hadn't seen it on their disastrous rendezvous on his couch.

Jack sat on his bed, pondering how he let himself get to this state. His mother and his very attractive _friend_ were raiding his closets, pulling open his drawers and laughing hysterically in only a matter of minutes. He couldn't help but smile as he saw Kate putting on one of his old flannel shirts, the fabric draping loosely around her. She buttoned it up and twirled around, modeling it for him, her small frame drowning in the expanse of the material.

"Jack that shirt is horrendous. You don't wear that in public, do you?" Margo eyed him, but noticed that he wasn't paying any attention to her. He was stuck grinning at Kate, his eyes trained on her and laughing genuinely at her actions.

"All the time, mom," he told her absently.

Margo continued opening the drawers, before she reached the top one. "Mom, I think my judgment in underwear is just fine," he told her with a laugh.

Kate peered in the drawer and gave him a teasing smile. She saw something glint at the bottom and stuck her hand in before she could think about it. When she realized what she was holding, she tried to shove it back into the pile of clothes, but Jack had seen it already.

His face fell when he saw his wedding ring shine in the light.

"Jack, I'm sorry," she told him, this time serious. He could feel his mother's eyes on him as well.

He nodded at Kate. "It's okay. I'll take it."

She looked confused. "I can just put it back; it's no big deal…"

He stood up slowly, taking it from her outstretched hand. "No, it's time to let go," he told them both.

Margo watched in amazement as her son, the man she'd seen nothing but negativity since the ending of his marriage, walked over to the window and opened it with a resounding creak. She thought about trying to stop him, but knew that the promise of money for the ring meant nothing to him. Both she and Kate watched with satisfaction as he tossed the ring out window, cutting ties. He rested his hands on the ledge for a moment and Margo glanced at Kate. They both shared a smile, and Margo safely assumed that she knew all about his marriage.

He finally turned around and gave them both a slightly amused look. "So, are you done consulting on my wardrobe? Can we finally go?" He asked them as though nothing had just happened, as if he hadn't just taken a significant step towards moving on. They both knew not to press the issue. If Jack wanted to talk about what just happened, he would do it in time.

Jack, on the other hand, was bursting at the seams. He wanted nothing more than to yell, than to talk to his mother and Kate, to celebrate the fact that he'd thrown away his wedding ring, the single object that reminded him of Sarah most. But he couldn't bring himself to do it, to celebrate doing something that he should've done the day his ex-wife told him she was leaving. He'd thought about selling it many times, getting some extra cash, but he knew it would bring nothing good to him. Jack knew himself well enough to realize that anything he ever bought with that money would remind him again. It would be an endless cycle, so making a clean cut was the best.

Margo looked at him a moment longer than he was comfortable with, but he knew that she was proud of him. Jack broke the stare and gave them both an uneasy smile. They headed out of the building and out to Jack's car. He opened the passenger side door like he always did and his mother sat down. He shot Kate a glance of apology and she brushed him off with a giggle.

"What… you're not going to let me drive this time?" She teased him, referring to the night when she'd practically begged him to let her drive his car, and he had surprisingly obliged. He smiled at her in the rearview mirror.

He shrugged his shoulders, trying to play down the situation. "You practically killed us."

He'd said it purely to get a reaction out of her, and he did. Her jaw opened in fake horror. "I did not!"

Margo sat in the passenger's seat, listening to his son. He actually seemed happy, and she could honestly say she hadn't seen him this way in a very long time. He was crazy to pass Kate up, but she knew that he was healing. After all, she was doing the same thing, mourning the end of a relationship, but their endings were much different. One brought on by death and the other by selfishness.

"Why so quiet?"

"Just thinking," Margo told her son.

They soon arrived and both the women could see how much Jack was dreading this.

"I don't understand why men can't enjoy shopping," Kate scoffed. Jack shot her a look, not appreciating her mocking him, but cracked a smile after a moment.

When they entered the department store, Jack plopped down into the plush chairs in the men's section.

"What are you doing?" Kate asked him. "We have a bunch of shopping to do…"

He crossed his legs, leaning back into the chair, trying to relax. "You two can just pick out whatever you want, mock me over there, and then I'll try it on," he said sarcastically.

Margo grabbed his hand roughly, pulling him out of the chair. "No time for grumbling Jack."

"He's never liked shopping," she mumbled at Kate. "He used to hide in the clothes racks when he was little so I couldn't find him."

"I bet. He's a whiny little thing, isn't he?"

Jack let himself be dragged through the sections by the two women. Frankly, he was shocked that his mother had taken such a liking to Kate. He'd never seen her warm so quickly to any of his friends, let alone female friends.

He tried on sweaters, button ups, jeans, work slacks, and even _vests._ Jack was basically at the point where he didn't care what he had on. Kate handed him a pair of dark wash jeans and a polo shirt. He scoffed.

"You want me to look like a prep?"

Kate rolled her eyes at him. "It will look good. I promise."

He tried them both on, extremely thankful that it was the last ensemble he'd have to model. He walked out with no expression on his face. He felt the same in this outfit as he had in all the others- stupid and awkward. Kate grinned when he walked out.

"Told you." Margo agreed with her and they sorted through the clothes they thought he should get. Kate stole glances at Jack as he walked back into the dressing room. She'd purposely picked tight fitting jeans, just to see if he could pull them off. Boy could he, she thought.

"He likes you, you know," Margo said, breaking the silence.

Kate stopped folding the shirt she had in her hands. "I'm not so sure about that," she responded lightly.

"He may not want to after what's happened to him in the past, but he does. Trust me." Margo echoed Kate's previous words. She hadn't expected to like Jack's mother, but found herself forming an odd bond with the woman. They were both trying to help Jack along.

"What was she like?" Kate was beyond curious, but she didn't feel it was exactly appropriate or conscious of Jack's feelings to ask him about her.

Margo paused, sitting in one of the chairs they'd now cleared. "Sarah was… everything Jack ever wanted." Her words were slow and deliberate. "She was nice, caring, bubbly, very pretty, but I guess in the end there was just something missing."

Kate nodded at the woman across from her. "So she just left?"

"Apparently she'd been cheating on him for quite a while. They were married for almost five years, you know," the older woman added. "Anyway, I probably shouldn't be telling you all this. But obviously it's left Jack in kind of a bad state."

"I don't understand how anyone could do that." Her tone was sad and contemplative, not just towards Jack's situation, but of her previous relationship as well.

Margo turned to face her now. "He's better now though, don't you think?"

It was Kate's turn to shrug. "I haven't really known him long enough to know," she pointed out.

"Well, he is. He seems happier." Kate could see how pleased it made her.

"Good." She smiled at Jack's mother and stopped inquiring when she heard Margo clear her throat. While Kate appreciated the gesture, there was no need for it, as she could always tell when Jack was around. She got that feeling on her back and it climbed to her neck, some sort of sense that Jack was near her.

He stopped short of them, his hands deep in his pockets. "You two weren't talking about me were you?" He smiled at the two. He could tell that they had been.

"Of course we were," Kate grinned at him. She gathered a large pile of clothes in her arms. "So you're getting these," she told him straightly.

Jack raised his eyebrows in question. "Oh, I am, am I?" he laughed. Not that he disagreed; he'd trust women's taste in clothes over his own any day. If they told him he looked good, then they were probably right.

"Whatever you say, princess." He took another pile from the chair and they headed to the checkout. He sighed and pulled out his credit card, not fully aware of how much damage would be done, but knowing it would be significant.

He paid for the hundreds of dollars worth of clothing and let his shoulders fall, thankful to be done with the excursion.

"Where do you think you're going?" his mother asked him as he turned towards the exit.

"Uhh, to the car," he said slowly, not understand why she was having difficulty with this.

Kate looped her arm through his and turned him around. "This was just one store, buddy. We still have the whole afternoon ahead of us," she said with a laugh and she patted him on the back for encouragement.

"What's that saying? Beauty is pain?" He paused as the two women rolled their eyes. "Yeah. That's true."

"Get over it Jack," Kate cut in.

A few hours and hundreds of dollars later, Kate and Margo allowed Jack to drive them home. He was exhausted, and it was beyond him how bubbly the two were, keeping up a constant flow of conversation on the way home. Margo insisted on getting home, not coming up to his apartment after they'd arrived.

"Sorry, I've got to get going though. I'll see you on Sunday?" It was more of a statement, as Jack would have a hard time ever missing on of his lunches with his mother. To his surprise his mother gave him a quick hug, but he hugged her back. They weren't exactly the picture of affection, but he sensed that his mother felt closer to him than she had in a long time. "Don't let this one get past you…" she said quietly into his ear.

On her way to her car, Margo suddenly turned around, her high heel pressing into the warm pavement of the parking lot. "And Kate? Make sure he hangs those shirts up?"

"You got it," she laughed, knowing that Margo was right in that Jack would probably toss everything to floor once he got inside.

Kate helped him with all the bags and they rode up the elevator in silence. He let her in the apartment and she followed him back into his room. They got all of the clothes out of the bag, and Jack was overwhelmed by the sheer mess they'd made.

"I can't believe I let you two talk me into buying all this," he sighed, rubbing his hands tiredly over his hair.

She started hanging some of the shirts up, and soon had taken everything out of the closet, insisting on color coding. He gave up on his protests, letting her organize. She struggled to reach the top shelf in the closet and the folded sweater she had propped in her hand came crashing back down on her.

"Here, let me help," he offered sweetly, standing next to her in the small doorway.

Kate wanted to take a step back. She could feel his body heat next to hers as his arm brushed against hers. It was as though some sort of magnetic strength was bringing them together, and she subconsciously turned her body towards his. He was reacting with the same force as he faced her. He looked at her with his warm brown eyes and they inched nearer to each other. When his hand hit her waist, he turned away, embarrassed. This couldn't happen, he thought.

She knew he was right for stopping what would surely be difficult to turn around once it began, but she couldn't help but feel the disappointment flash through her.

"So, umm, I think we're done here, huh?" she asked casually.

Jack faced her again, hesitantly. "Yep, looks like it."

They paused. "Well I don't know if I should be thanking you for taking me on the shopping trip from hell, but nonetheless…"

"You're welcome," she told him. She stepped forward and gave him a quick hug, but felt how he pulled away at first.

"So I'll see ya later?"

He nodded and she left, shaking the jitters from her body, caused by the one man she couldn't seem to get out of her mind.


	8. Pop! Goes My Heart

_Thanks so much for all of your reviews- this story is really a pleasure to write!_

Pop! Goes My Heart

"She told you to go to hell?" Kate laughed incredulously and reached towards the chip bowl on the coffee table in front of her.

Jack shrugged. "I guess she didn't appreciate my comments." He paused and laughed slightly, glad to have found some humor in the situation. "Or the fact that I saved her daughter's life, but that's beside the point."

They were sitting on Jack's couch together, watching a football game they both pretended to really care about, but they were really using it as an excuse to see each other. Since Kate started hanging around more and he found himself truly enjoying her company, Jack started working fewer hours, usually getting home around 9.

She would leave him something under his door- a note, something goofy she'd drawn in her free time at the school, sometimes funny sayings her students had written on assignments. It was their little tradition now- he'd find the surprise under the door and go visit Kate to find out the story behind it. At first he'd been confused by the scraps of paper lying on the carpet, but he'd grown fond of the game they played. On this particular day, he'd arrived home to a folded piece of paper that revealed largely spaced lines with dashes through them- the unmistakable writing paper for those with less than stellar motor skills. He'd scanned the paper and read the few sentences the young student had written in large, sloppy handwriting.

_'When I grow up I want to be a doct__er cause I wanna save people. Also I think the white jacket they where is cool.'_

Somehow she always knew how to brighten his day. Today hadn't been that easy- he'd lost a patient after a lengthy surgery, and like any other doctor, he felt horrible about it. Someone had lost a family member, a friend, a lover… the possibilities seemed endless. Still, she'd managed to stray his thoughts from the bad surgery and focus on the two successes he'd had that day.

"Have you talked to your mom lately?"

Jack took a swig of beer and nodded. "As always," he grinned. "She calls me practically every day!"

Kate laughed along with him and rested her feet on the table. She knew he wouldn't care.

"So what about you?"

She glanced at him and asked him airily, "What about me?"

"Do you talk to your mom a lot? You know, since you moved and everything?"

Setting her cold beer on the table, she responded. "I've been talking to her a lot lately. This is all a big change for me. We could be closer I guess, but we have a good relationship."

"That's good. Everyone needs someone," he tried.

Kate rolled her eyes. "I think you need to be telling yourself that…" On his confused look, she continued. "Look, I can say this because we're friends. And it's my job…"

He got the feeling he wasn't going to like it. "You don't let anyone in, Jack. You push everyone away, and I know about your past and all that… but I worry about you." She appeared sincere.

"That's not true. I let you in," he pointed out.

A bark of laughter escaped her throat. "Yeah, cause I fought my way in. Not everyone's as persistent as me."

"You're telling me." He threw her sarcasm right back at her in a teasing manner. "You're right though, I know."

They'd recently discovered the boundaries of their growing friendship. They weren't past a little self wallowing, either. "You realize neither of us have any other friends," Jack said evenly.

Kate burst out laughing, knowing how true his statement was. "Yeah, we're pretty pathetic, huh?"

Playing along with her amusement, Jack patted her on the arm. "It's okay. At least we can be pathetic together."

The Chinese food they'd ordered for take out arrived a few minutes later. It never failed to amaze him how much food Kate could store away. Her small frame was deceiving.

She used her chopsticks and dangled a noodle into her mouth. "You know, I was thinking about that note I left under your door today."

"The doctor one?" he laughed.

"Yeah. I think you should come in for show and tell." She smirked as she took in the puzzled look that sprang across his face.

"Show and tell?"

"I'll claim you. Don't worry."

Jack leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, throwing Kate an amused glance. "Why would I do that?"

"Because you can't resist me, and you can't say no to me…" she said in a sing song voice. "It'll be like a little Q&A with Dr. Jack." She continued, still chewing but getting her point across. "Come on," she suggested with a hint of nagging, "the kids will love you!"

"They'll be bored out of their minds," he countered.

With a wave of her small hand she tossed away his opinion. "Kids eat this stuff up, Jack. Do it… for me?" She put on her best pout and broke into smile when she saw him waiver.

"Fine," he finally admitted, tossing his hands into the air in defeat. He had no idea how Kate had become so persuasive over him. Well, he had an idea… but he couldn't act on it. Not yet. "I'll get you back sometime, you know," he warned her with a genuine smile. He was getting used to feeling content with his life, though he wasn't sure he'd ever get used to being satisfied. It had never been a part of his character.

They sat in relative silence and watched the remaining quarter of football. "So you're doing it on Friday, you realize?"

A cough choked out of his throat as he tried to swallow the rest of his beer. "Really now?"

"Don't pretend like you have something going on… I know you don't work on Fridays."

It was true, and it became obvious that Kate had a good memory. And at the moment, it was working against him. He wasn't afraid to talk to a bunch of elementary school kids- he had plenty of experience dealing with children and he had always been comfortable around them. It was Kate he was afraid to be around. He wanted to impress her, not embarrass himself.

When Kate left his apartment several hours later, they went through their awkward goodbyes as they always did. It was unspoken, but realized easily and frequently by both that they were still very attracted to each other. They downplayed it as much as possible during the time they spent together, but some things just couldn't be masked, as hard as they tried.

Although he knew he was happier than he'd been in a long time, Jack was frustrated with himself. There, standing right in front of him, was an amazing woman, a woman who could make him laugh, who was honest with him, who didn't pity him, who was everything he could ask for, and he couldn't bring himself to do anything about it. It was still about _him_. He was still looking out purely for himself.

A bright yellow sticky note was lying just inside the door when Jack arrived home the following night. It was later than he'd been getting home recently, as he'd had to perform an emergency surgery on an older lady who'd been brought in by ambulance. On the paper he recognized Kate's handwriting, and below it a pen sketch of Jack breaking a door open. He laughed and realized that the stick people were supposed to be the two of them depicted the morning after she'd locked herself out of her apartment. Except this time, instead of calling him a hero, she'd taken the initiative and drawn a Superman cape on his back.

The door to his apartment remained ajar as he laughed openly over the note. Suddenly Kate poked her head around it.

"Hey stranger," she said cheerily.

He held the yellow note up. "Thanks for this."

"I got bored during their recess." She blushed slightly, though he couldn't figure out why. "So… you ready for tomorrow?"

"Oh yeah. Dr. Jack to the rescue," he told her sarcastically, closing the door behind her. She leaned on the kitchen counter, leafing through a catalog. Despite his anxiousness about the next day, he lifted a small box from the table beside the door. "I brought these home," he told her, revealing a box full of tongue depressors.

She giggled. "Perfect." Turning from the fridge, Jack offered her a bottle of water, but she declined. "I've got papers to grade," she explained. "But I'll see you tomorrow."

Jack's body was slightly blocking her way out and she brushed against him unintentionally, painfully trying to ignore the spark that rushed through her. He guided her out the door with his hand on her lower back and she closed her eyes once in the safety of her own apartment. It was getting even harder to pretend things between them were strictly friendly. She'd never felt a friend's handprint tingle on her back long after it had left; she'd never had to suck her breath in every time they smiled at her, every time they laughed.

* * *

The glass on either side of the classroom door let her know when Jack had arrived. She had told her class about the visitor only moments ago- she hadn't wanted them squirming in their seats even more than usual throughout the day. She almost laughed when she opened the door to reveal him decked out in medical items. The children chattered amongst themselves as he walked in.

"Guys, quiet down," Kate told them. "This is Dr. Shephard, our _very _special guest for show and tell today. What do we say to him?"

The class responded on demand. "Welcome Dr. Shephard." There seemed to be a contest amongst them as to who could say the phrase the loudest, and despite the shouted welcome, he smiled.

"Do you get to sew people together?" one boy immediately asked.

He nodded, dramatizing the events for the benefit and entertainment of the kids, who lapped up the information eagerly. Jack stood and next showed them his blue scrubs, the medical coat he was wearing, as well as the reflex tools and tongue depressors he'd brought.

Kate caught his eye once he'd passed out the popsicle-like sticks. She smiled at him and he returned it. He called up volunteers and sat them on the chair in front of him, testing their reflexes and heartbeats.

"Make Ms. Austen do it!" one child screeched. Kate had been watching from the side, letting Jack run the show since he'd been doing so well.

"No, no, this is for all of you," she tried, but failed after they only encouraged her more. Jack stood and pulled her by the hand to the seat facing him. They both looked like giants sitting in the small school chairs, but Jack especially. Kate played along as Jack tapped on her knees with the small tool. She blushed when her leg kicked out.

"Ahh, I think Ms. Austen here has some good reflexes," he laughed. She tried to zone out the fact that he was touching her legs, telling herself that she was sitting in a room full of impressionable kids. But still, his hands got to her.

"I better check her heart, huh?" Jack asked the class, knowing fully well they would persuade her.

He laughed and Kate could feel his breath hit her lightly. Putting the buds of the stethoscope in his ears he placed the cold metal circle against her chest. Her green eyes seemingly melted into his as he heard the steady pitter patter of her heart.

"What's it sound like?" a girl with light blonde hair asked him.

He broke his stare with Kate. It was starting to get to him. "It sounds great," he smiled.

Kate saw his wide grin as he observed her class and felt her pulse speed up. He was close to her now, so close that she could slightly feel the warmth coming from his body, could smell the aftershave he'd used. The stethoscope was still being held up to her chest and Jack looked at her with mischief in his eyes. She could feel her face burn.

"Oh. It's beating faster now," he told the class. "Yeah, it's definitely beating _way_ faster," he embellished, worsening Kate's case.

Gaining some of her senses back, Kate finally chimed in. "So what's that mean?"

The dark eyed man pulled the stethoscope from her chest and she felt her whole body relax.

"I don't know," he said, almost exclusively to her, in a light, inquisitive tone. "You tell me."


	9. Name It

_I could NOT believe that I got 26 reviews for the last chapter! That's pretty amazing, and thanks so much for all of your encouragement! For some reason, that was probably one of my favorites that I've written. Please continue to leave your feedback and I'm curious about what you'll all think at the end of this chapter..._

Name It…

"I can't believe I had to find out from your mother that your birthday is on Friday!" Kate had yelled at him when he opened the door. Her hands were on her hips and she was giving him a glare he'd found only women could pull off.

Sidestepping the actual statement, he replied. "Well hello to you too. You're talking to my mother?" He held the door open wide and she walked in, immediately sinking down into the cushions of the couch. "Since when?"

"She likes to check up on you…" she admitted guiltily. Their conversations were innocent enough, but Kate never had the intention of Jack finding out.

He waved her off. "We'll talk about you and my mom later. But what's the big deal about my birthday?"

Kate's head cocked to the side and a grin stretched out on her face. "Okay… so you're one of _those_ people." She continued on his confused look. "Someone who claims not to care about their birthday? Is that right?" She was twirling her long hair through her fingers, but still staring straight into his eyes, and Jack found himself distracted by it all.

He shrugged his shoulders, but might as well have just said yes. He sat down next to her on the couch. "So… 35, huh?" she teased him, raising her eyebrows up and down in his direction. She squealed on the inside when he looked embarrassed.

"It's not a big deal," he countered. "You want something to eat?"

Jack stood from the couch and went to the kitchen, and despite his efforts to change the subject, she followed. "Okay, so I take it you don't want a party?"

Kate watched him nod and saw that half smile form on his face. "Old man," she muttered, taking the bottle of beer he held out and turning on her heel out of the kitchen.

"I am _not_ old," he yelled after her. He returned to the couch with a beer of his own. "I'm not old," he repeated, as if he was trying to prove it to himself as well. Picking up a large pillow he hit her with it playfully.

"Then why not throw a big party and prove it?" That devilish look leaked into her eyes and it pushed him. "Or I'll throw it for you. Either way, you're getting a party."

Jack laughed loudly at her confidence. "Well when you put it like that…" Before he'd finished his sentence Kate had leaped up off of the couch and raised her arms in victory. Kate exuded happiness and freeness; she was the type of person he'd always wanted to be but somehow never could.

"This wasn't my idea though you know," she hinted at him, sitting close to him and turned toward his body.

It clicked in his mind that the party was probably his mother's idea. "So she's using you to bribe me?"

Kate giggled at his automatic correct guess. "I think that's a safe assumption." She paused. "She's a very intimidating woman, Jack!" she told him, as if she couldn't help but follow through on Margo's suggestions. "Plus, it could be fun."

"_How_?" he asked incredulously. "She'll have it in some snotty country club with a bunch of people I don't really like and who don't really care about me… just impressing my mother enough to get her to sponsor their next fundraiser…" he babbled, until Kate put her hand against his moving mouth jokingly.

"Jack," she said slowly, "that's where I can help you here. Your mother is giving you a party whether you like it or not, but I know that she'll take my suggestions," she smiled.

He shifted in his seat, feeling his leg tingle. Kate's hand was still resting there, naturally almost. They both noticed it and she moved it away awkwardly. "Umm, have you ever met my mother? In case you didn't notice, she doesn't exactly take suggestions well." He rolled his eyes. Jack loved his mother, but she was a handful. "I'm not promising any miracles…"

"Why are you doing this for me?" He was sincere, she could tell, because the previous amusement in his eyes had faded some. He leaned back into the couch, maintaining eye contact with her, with those piercing dark orbs.

Ever since their run around in her classroom the previous week, Kate had had a hard time even being around Jack. Every time he smiled at her, she had to cover up how she was affected by it; she had to try not to blush every time he said something remotely complimentary. After all, she knew what his lips felt like against hers and how he had responded to her… what could have been.

"Because I don't want you to have a miserable birthday…and something tells me you probably haven't celebrated it in awhile."

* * *

They'd made plans to go running that night. Jack had practically insisted, since he wasn't crazy about Kate running alone at night, especially as she was new to the city. He sat in the lobby, waiting for her, nervous like he always was. He'd been having to deny his feelings even more than normal as of late- somehow he'd begun falling for her, even after he'd pulled away from her physically to prevent that from happening.

A ding rang through the large marble lobby and the silver doors to the elevator opened, revealing Kate. He waved quickly and murmured a greeting or two, desperate to tear his eyes away from her legs, which were on display in the running shorts she was wearing. They set off on a light jog.

"So I called your mom today," she spoke, glancing over at him quickly as they ran.

He laughed. "And how did that go?"

Their feet pounded the pavement in the balmy evening. Kate was thankful she'd moved to a warmer climate. "She listened to me, I'll have you know." She teased him, squeezing his bicep in the process.

He stopped in his tracks, pulling her back with him. "Really?"

Grinning and nodding, she bragged. "Left it up to me, basically."

"So when's this party going to happen?" He shook his head, mostly in disbelief that someone had _somehow_ gotten through to his mother.

"I'll just tell you when you should show up," Kate joked with him and took off into a run again, but somehow he knew there was a hint of seriousness in her voice. He knew better than to argue with her.

* * *

A big cake was drawn on a slip of paper when he awoke late Friday morning. Underneath it, the words _It's tonight!_ were written. He laughed when he saw the note. He'd suspected that the party would be the night of his birthday, but no matter how much he'd pestered Kate she wouldn't tell him anything. As endearing as it was, it also made him nervous.

That afternoon, after he'd returned from running errands and was putting groceries away, there was a knock at his door. He looked out the peephole to reveal Kate running her fingers through her long, shiny brown hair. She looked nervous, he thought.

"Happy Birthday!" she squealed when he opened it, throwing her arms around his broad shoulders and most of her body weight into him. Hugging her back, his arms stayed securely around her waist as their bodies pressed together all the way.

Jack rubbed his closely cropped hair nervously. "Thanks," he laughed. "So it's tonight?"

Nodding eagerly she took a step back. "You're not busy, are you?" she joked with him. He looked relaxed, in a pair of nicely fitting jeans and a t-shirt with a bit of a snug fit, to Kate's likeness. She finally tore her stare away from him before he noticed, or she hoped, at least.

Glancing around the apartment, he saw a cringe cross her face. "What?" he chuckled, shoving his hands deep in his pockets. She looked great, he noticed, and caught himself staring at the sliver of skin that was exposed when she planted her hands on her hips.

"We better clean this place up," she said absent-mindedly. "The party is here, by the way."

He couldn't help but gape at her revelation and she laughed at him. She placed a hand flat on his chest. "Jack, your place is perfect. Don't freak out about it. I'll take care of everything."

He stared at her just a little too long, and she kept her hand on his chest just a little too long, and the distance between them became too little…

By the time the guests arrived, Jack's complete faith in Kate had been restored. The place looked perfect and things were running smoothly. Between her and his mother, they'd managed to invite practically everyone Jack ever met. The apartment was crowded with minglers, each wishing him a happy birthday. His mother had just arrived and looked a little bit flustered at the crowd.

"Happy Birthday Jack," she told him sincerely and pulled him in for a quick hug. "I didn't think Kate could pull this off, she admitted. "It's going well I take it?"

He nodded and accepted the bottle of wine his mother offered him. Soon Kate was at his side. She took the bottle from him and he followed her over to the table where the others were stacked.

"I think they want to get you drunk," she offered with a laugh.

Taking a swig from his beer bottle, he agreed. "I think I'm about half way there."

She wrapped her arm around him and he let his weight lean into her. His side was warm against hers. "It's your birthday. You can do whatever you want." Kate flashed a smile at him. All he offered was a small grin in return, but he mulled over her words in his mind for quite some time. If he really acted on what he was thinking, on what he was trying to deny, Kate would probably feel it was the best thing she ever blurted out of her mouth…

After escaping his mother's endless attempts at heartfelt conversations and rounds of birthday singing, he spotted Kate in the corner, a wineglass in her hand. She was laughing loudly with a guy he recognized from the hospital, but couldn't quite place. He felt a flash of jealousy rush through him and had to fight off the urge to take her away from him.

He'd been having a good time, catching up with old friends and actually intending on keeping in touch with them. For the first time in a long while, he'd felt comfortable in a large social situation, even one in his honor. Maybe he should thank his mother for the idea, after all. The crowd had thinned in the wee hours of the morning.

"Hey," Kate said when she found him lounging on the now deserted couch. When she sat down, the last guest left, leaving them alone. "Did you have a good time?" she asked him hopefully.

A genuine grin appeared on his masculine features. "Yeah, I really did." They sat in silence for a few minutes, the night sinking into both of them. "Thanks for doing this for me, Kate. It means a lot to me," he offered, sure that he couldn't thank her enough.

"That's what friends are for, huh?" It was an awkward statement and Kate cursed herself inaudibly. Jack had turned on the cushion more, scooting closer to her in the process. "So you looked like you were having fun too." He tried not to accuse her of anything. It would've been within her right, anyhow.

She still picked up a hint of bitterness in his voice. "What's that supposed to mean?" Kate frowned slightly, running her fingers over the rim of her now empty wine glass.

"I saw you with that guy. What's his name again? He's from the hospital."

It dawned on her that he was jealous. Part of her wanted to be mad, because after he'd basically rejected her, he had no right to monitor who she was or wasn't interested in dating. Not that there was anyone other than him…

"Paul?" On his nod, she glared at him. "We were just talking. What's it to you anyway?"

They were playing their game again, where they had to put up the boundaries between them, had to pretend there weren't other thoughts going through their minds.

She dropped her hand into the small space between them and it grazed against Jack's thigh. "I didn't get you a present," she admitted bashfully, looking up into his eyes. They were warm and hazy, and something seemed different about them. His large palm suddenly, but surely grasped hers and wove its fingers between hers.

Her eyes widened. Her heart raced again and she was sure he caught on, but this time, she told herself, he didn't need a stethoscope to prove it. "You don't need to get me a present," he told her nonchalantly, seemingly staring at the wall. "You made all of this happen," he said, meaning the party she'd put together.

Finally he looked into her eyes while they spoke. "Still, I feel like I owe you something." She sat up and suddenly his hand was gone, but his body was closer to hers. "So name it," she laughed.

Jack grinned. "Anything?"

Kate rolled her eyes. "Well, almost anything…"

He was leaning forward suddenly, and he paused with his face inches away from hers. "Okay, it's settled then," he breathed. Kate shivered at the feeling but tried her hardest not to break their lock. Then his lips were on hers, softly, and she kissed him back. Her whole body tingled as he ran his hands lightly up and down her sides. His lips were soft and the kiss innocent. Kate wondered how something so simple could make her whole body hum. They pulled away a few seconds later, neither of them quite sure how they'd ended up that way.

In a hushed, nervous tone, she finally spoke. "Happy Birthday, Jack."


	10. Liquid Courage

_Thank you so, so much for your reviews. They're incredible and I can't believe the sudden response to this! Hope you continue to enjoy it._

Liquid Courage

_Come over_, the first note read when Jack stepped inside that night. He sighed when he read it. His day had been long and stressful, and talking to Kate about the kiss they'd shared the night before was hardly his idea of relaxation. First of all, he didn't know what to say to her, or how to explain his feelings to her. Jack couldn't even explain them to himself. He hated feeling this way, like he was trapped in some other universe, in a place where he shouldn't be, he kept telling himself. Still, after he'd changed out of his work clothes and into something more comfortable, he knocked on Kate's door lightly.

She answered immediately, and she was expecting him around this time, he knew.

"Hey," he offered brightly, in attempts to lighten what would surely be a heavy mood.

To his surprise, she smiled widely back at him. "Hey yourself." Kate held the door open and he stepped through.

"Sit down," she told him. "Want something to drink?" Confusion rushed through him- she was being a bit polite, wasn't she? He shook his head.

He remained standing. "What's this about, Kate?" Shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans, he waited for her answer.

Instead she gave him a look of annoyance, suggesting that his question was rather stupid.

"Okay, okay, so I know what this is about." Sitting down awkwardly in a deep red armchair, he stared at her. His heart still fluttered.

His birthday party had been a lot of fun, but somehow he'd managed to screw up their friendship in the process. He hadn't planned to kiss her- but when he was sitting there next to her, her leg against his, her long curls brushing on the tops of his shoulders, he found that he couldn't hold back any longer.

Something about her was intoxicating. And suddenly Kate's lips were on his, although he knew he'd initiated it, and they were soft and completely kissable. He'd pulled away, not sure which he regretted more, or which he was supposed to regret more- pulling back or kissing her in the first place. Kate had left shortly after, on shaky legs and fumbled words.

"So what was that all about?" She paused. "Last night." Kate tucked a leg underneath her where she sat on the sofa. She'd known when Jack would get home, so she'd done herself a favor and had a few glasses of wine beforehand, to ease her nerves. The kiss was all she'd thought about the whole day- the fact that she didn't have work to distract her not helping her cause. She'd enjoyed it, sure, but why had it happened? He'd initiated it- this time.

It took him a while to answer, Jack's elbows on his knees as he stared seemingly into the carpet. It made her nervous. "It was a birthday kiss," he finally answered, meeting her gaze. There was a small flicker of visible disappointment that tore through her eyes and Jack didn't miss it. It was the same flicker that was coursing its way through his own body. Before she could ask, he answered. "I don't know why it happened."

"Yeah," she mumbled. "Me either." They sat in silence, both feeling extremely awkward and out of place.

"What are we supposed to do about this?" Jack finally asked her, getting up from his seat in the armchair and plopping down next to her.

Kate tried to hold the tears back that were threatening to form. She was falling for the man sitting next to her, a man who had already told her, plain and clear, that he couldn't be with her. She no longer believed that it was her own fault- that she wasn't good enough or pretty enough, or smart enough, but that the problem lay within the man next to her. And the last thing she wanted was to be the next "Sarah", the next woman to break his heart.

"Jack, this can't keep happening," she told him softly. He nodded.

"I know... and I'm sorry that it did." His words were meant for comfort, but Jack immediately realized it wasn't how they were taken. "No... Kate..." he pleaded, "I'm not sorry that it happened, I'm sorry that I can't _let _it happen." His eyes were soft and she could tell he was sincere.

She wrung her hands together. "So are we supposed to pretend this didn't happen?" Her eyes were wide and bore into his.

He wasn't quite sure what the right thing to say was, or even if there was something that could ease her. Because, like always, he'd made another mistake, although this time he wasn't exactly beating himself up about it. Jack thought carefully before he spoke.

"It was a birthday kiss," he said, and although he'd said it before, this time it meant something entirely different. He couldn't help but chuckle and Kate joined in.

She didn't want to take it that easily, but found herself accepting enough of his response since she'd been through it before with him. Although he'd initiated it, Kate could've stopped him. She couldn't help but think he looked vulnerable sitting there, a small smile on his face, but cupping his chin in his hands.

"Okay... so that's it?" Her tone was lighter now, suggesting to the man sitting next to her that she wasn't angry at him.

"Yeah... you get one on your birthday too, okay?" he joked with her and she burst into laughter.

"This is weird," she admitted a few minutes later after they'd turned on the TV in attempts to bury the silence.

Jack turned towards her. "Look, you know why I can't do it, don't you?"

"Of course. I don't think you really need to explain it to me again..." she trailed off.

"Because Kate, if I was a sane man, none of this would even be a question."

"Yeah," she teased him, "but you're not."

* * *

A few days had passed since they'd really seen each other. Although she'd been leaving notes, Jack would just stop over and say a quick hello. It was still a little awkward- they both knew why. 

One of Kate's new friends from school was over Wednesday night, helping her finish decorating the apartment. That task had ended hours ago, and they had retired to her kitchen table, wine in hand. Although she loved being friends with Jack, he just couldn't provide the female bonding she'd so missed. Caroline had taken awhile to warm up to Kate- perhaps because they were both young, beautiful, successful teachers.

"Frankly I can't believe you still talk to the guy," Caroline told her with a wave of the hand. "Sounds like a flake to me."

She had a point.

"He's- it's not like that with him," she tried.

"So you just let him tease you and lead you on?" Kate knew she had valid points and was honestly trying to protect her, but she'd never met Jack.

She met Caroline's hard stare. "Look, I know how this seems. And maybe you're partly right... but he's a good friend. And he doesn't mean any harm."

Her red haired friend crinkled the place mat underneath her fingers. "It's up to you, really. I just don't want things to go too far. This whole time, from what you've told me, he's been trying to protect _himself._ But what if it's you who ends up getting hurt?"

There was a knock on the door and Kate glanced at the clock on the microwave. 9:45. It was him.

"Speak of the devil," she mumbled.

"It's him?" Caroline whispered.

Kate nodded at her frantically. "Don't say anything stupid," she warned her, before opening the door to him.

"Hey," he grinned. "Nice note." He held it up in front of him, still dressed in work clothes. Tonight's selection had been a quote she saw on a poster in the classroom next to her.

_Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils... _

"That's quite a hint," he smirked.

She folded her hands in front of her. "Couldn't help myself."

Jack broke her stare and saw the other woman in the room. "I'm sorry... I didn't know you had company." He looked uncomfortable.

Caroline strode over to the two. "Don't be silly. I'm Caroline... Jack did you say?"

"Yeah... nice to meet you." He was puzzled as he didn't remember ever saying his name...

"Caroline works at the school," Kate explained.

"Well, don't let me ruin your fun," he smiled, "I just wanted to say hi."

Kate grabbed his arm. "Nah, don't leave," she pleaded with him. "We're running out of things to talk about anyway."

"Sit yourself down, Jack. Want some wine?" Caroline waved the bottle in front of him and poured him a glass. He laughed and accepted.

"So Jack," she started once he had sat down, "Kate here tells me you're a surgeon."

He glanced at Kate and she blushed a little. "You've been talking about me behind my back?" he asked her teasingly, cocking his eyebrows.

"Well, you know, it just uhh, it just kinda came up, and uhh..."

"She talks about you all the time," Caroline pointed out and it was Kate's turn to gape.

She smacked her friend lightly on the arm. "I do not!"

"Kate... come on," Jack laughed at her. "How could you not?" He was mocking her, he realized, but he couldn't help it. She looked so cute with her nose scrunched up and her eyes glaring at him.

She pouted until Jack apologized over and over. Caroline watched the two interact, feeling as though she hardly existed inside the apartment. Kate was right, that she'd have to meet Jack to realize how their relationship worked. The man was extremely charming, though it didn't appear he meant to be most of the time. It was clear that the two were intensely attracted to each other.

Caroline flashed her eyes at her watch and faked a sigh. "Oh God, Kate, I have to get going. I still have a bunch of papers to grade." How could a fellow teacher not believe that excuse?

"Oh," Kate frowned, appearing surprised. "Well thanks so much for all your help... I'll see you tomorrow then?"

The red head and smiled at the two of them. "Sure thing. Jack," she nodded, "it was nice meeting you."

She left and Jack started laughing. "Did we scare her off?"

* * *

"I want to go out tonight," Jack complained. They were stopped in the vegetable section at the grocery store. He leaned heavily on the cart. 

Kate turned toward him, a bag of frozen peas lofted in her hands. "You? Want to go out? Am I hearing this right?"

"It's not impossible you know," he deadpanned. "You wanna go to the bar or something?"

Despite her surprise, she accepted. "Pick me up at 9," she joked with him.

* * *

"This was a bad idea," Jack moaned over his drink. "That," he pointed to the glass in front of him, "is why I stick with beer." 

"Oh, shut up," she retorted. "Drink up," Kate suggested, and they tipped back their glasses.

Kate laughed through several hours as they sat at the bar. They'd each had several drinks bought for them, only thanking the buyers politely. Kate had never seen Jack blush so much in his life. He was drunk, she could tell, buzzed in thought. He was rubbing his hand along her knee, and although she wasn't as drunk as he, she did nothing to stop it.

"You're beautiful," he told her randomly. She blushed and shook her head, ready to fight back. "No," he stopped her, "you really are."

She decided to use his inebriated state to her advantage. "Yeah, you think so?" He nodded, tracing patterns on the bar top. "Why's that?"

"I'm so stupid, aren't I? Sulking over myself when I could have you?" He looked her up and down for awhile, and it made her body burn. "Your hair," he told her simply. "It's long and wavy and beautiful." She was about to cut in about how ridiculous he was, but he continued. "And your freckles." Reaching toward her face, he let his fingers dance over her cheeks. She closed her eyes. "And your eyes. They're this clear shade of green." Long after his hand had left her cheek, she felt his soft touches.

Kate did nothing to stop him from talking. If he remembered in the morning, he would regret it, she was sure. "Then sometimes you'll laugh and I'll get caught up in it," he admitted, finally breaking their lock. She got lost in a daze, staring into her drink and stirring it constantly. "You know how dorky your smile is?" he asked her, and it was all it took for her attention to snap back up to him.

She'd thought he was on a roll with his compliments. Frowning her brow, she asked him, "what?"

Moving his hand from her knee to her upper arm, he eased her. "No, no, that's exactly why I love it," Jack mused, rubbing his hands over his hair, as if he was just realizing for the first time how much he was exposing his feelings. "It's so dorky, but adorable, and it lights up your face."

"Well thank you for the compliments, Jack. I'll be sure to remind myself the next time I hate what I see in the mirror." The buzz in her body was now reaching her head, but she hardly minded. She wasn't quite sure if the feeling was from the alcohol, or from his words.

He got up from his stool. "I gotta pee. I'll be right back." She laughed- hard, when he left. His last words broke the spell, and his liquid courage would be gone soon enough.


	11. The Future Freaks Me Out

_I want to thank the numerous people I've conversed with in regards to the content of this chapter... I appreciate your help, and this chapter was a really hard decision for me! I went with what felt right to me, and I hope you all agree and will let me know what you think!_

The Future Freaks Me Out

"So when are we going out?" he asked Kate. The voice made her stop in her tracks, the halls now free from the echo of her clicking heels.

She laughed at their encounter- she certainly hadn't expected to see him at the school. Regaining her composure, she shot him a look, holding snugly onto the files in her arms.

"Good to see you," she spoke warmly. "What are you doing here?"

He stopped, running his hand quickly through his short hair. "Glad to see I'm welcome.."

"No, no, it's not that," Kate insisted. "I wasn't expecting to see you, that's all. So what's up?"

They continued walking and he followed her back to the classroom. School had been let out an hour previously, and they were blessed with a child-free environment.

Leaning against the door frame, he appeared a bit uncomfortable, Kate thought. She sat at her desk.

"I'm trying to get this student medical grant, and this is one of the schools I chose to support. I was just dropping off the drafts of the proposals to the principle."

The news he brought ran through her mind, and- no, he hadn't mentioned it the other night.

"So I'm serious."

"...About what?" Kate could feel something coming on, something she shouldn't accept.

An impish grin swept over his handsome features. "About taking you out."

Crossing her legs, she said, "You were drunk when you brought that up." Her voice was even with a slight tone of amusement.

He strode forward in the room. "Okay, maybe so," the man laughed. "I guess I should trust my drunk judgment more often, huh?" On her sideways glance, he persuaded her. "Come on, just one date. I'll show you a good time, I promise." His smile was white and wide, and it began to work its charm on her. Why shouldn't she go out with him?

"How about tonight?" Kate closed her mouth, shutting out the words she was about to vocalize. "I know it's last minute," he added. He smiled at her, that innocent, suave smile and she felt herself blush.

Twirling her hair through her fingers unknowingly, she paused for a moment before accepting. It was fun to watch men squirm, she thought. "Okay," she said evenly. "I'll see you tonight, Paul."

* * *

Caroline leafed through Kate's closet, trying to pick out the right date outfit. "I can't believe a relative stranger just asked you out," she said absently, cringing at a red sweater she came upon.

"He's not a stranger," Kate laughed in response. "I met him at Jack's birthday party."

"And you say he was drunk? What a first impression," she scoffed.

The brunette rolled her eyes playfully and sat on her bed. It was nice to have a friend, someone to do these girly things with. "He seems nice."

Pulling out a simple black dress, Caroline urged her to stand up and held the garment in front of her. "I like," she mentioned. Kate smiled and agreed. It was the dress she wore on her one and only date with Jack.

"But what about Jack?" She'd seen the way they acted around each other, and it was difficult to get through her head that her friend Kate was now going out with a different man.

Kate stretched back on the bed. "What about him?"

Caroline laughed sarcastically. "It's not like you're _in love_ with him or anything!"

Her friend gaped in response. "I am not! It's not like that with us... anymore."

"But you want it to be," she pointed out evenly.

Kate took the dress of the hanger. "It doesn't matter what I want- not if he doesn't."

Some time later, after Caroline had helped her with her hair, Kate felt a pair of eyes staring into her. "What?" She smoothed her fingers over the styled locks and examined her light makeup. She had the feeling she was about to get the third degree from her new friend.

"What's this Paul guy like, anyway?" Caroline took Kate's brush out of her hand and proceeded to run it through her long, red locks.

Kate shrugged, the strap of her dress slipping off her shoulder in the process. "He's tall, pretty charming if I do say so myself, short brown hair... what else do you want to know?"

She shot Kate a look that suggested Kate didn't actually _know_ anything else about this man. She remained silent, and it ate away at Kate's conscience.

"What?" she asked finally. "Why are you being so weird about this?"

Eying her carefully, Caroline stood from her seat on the vanity table. "Nothing," she replied, trying to hold back. On Kate's continuous stare, she added, "He just sounds exactly like Jack, that's all."

* * *

She sat in the cramped restaurant with Paul. While she was having a good time, there was something that wasn't sitting right with her.

"So you must feel honored having Jack as your neighbor, huh?" he joked with her, snapping her out of the trance she'd been in for a few minutes.

"Why's that?" she pretended to flirt. She leaned forward for good measure, to seem more interested. In all honesty, it was the most interested she'd been the entire night, and she guessed it was because of Paul's mention of Jack.

"World class spinal surgeon and all that..."

"Well you're probably a world class surgeon yourself, don't be so bashful," Kate giggled.

* * *

Nothing. The carpet was bare in the area her notes usually sat. Immediately wondering if something was wrong, he walked across the hall and knocked on her door. No answer. He decided against calling her cell phone in fear of seeming like a stalker, and went to bed after his long day at work.

* * *

"Where were you last night?" he asked her the next night as they sat in his living room. She noticed right away that he was wearing his "tight" jeans, as she called them in her mind.

Kate rolled her eyes at him, at how worried he was. "I was... out," she told him, resting her feet on the table. "God, I'm so tired..."

"Out?" He was grilling her, she knew, but it was fun to watch him worry.

"Yeah. Out," she said sarcastically.

Jack shook his shaved head. "Why are you being so secretive about this?" He wasn't trying to accuse her of anything, but got the feeling he should.

Flicking on the TV, she raised her eyebrows at him. "And why are you tracking my every move?"

"I was worried, okay?" he finally admitted. "Am I allowed to be worried about you?"

On his honesty, she decided to dish out her own. "I was on a date with Paul." She heard the sharp intake of breath from the man sitting next to her and shifted on the cushions beneath her small frame.

"My Paul?"

Kate couldn't help but chuckle at the phrase. "I'm sure he'll be thrilled to hear you referring to him like that." She paused. "But yes, your Paul. From the hospital."

"I thought you just talked at my party?" He tried to appear indifferent but guessed he was probably failing miserably. "Did you give him your number or something?"

_I'm enjoying this way too much,_ Kate thought. "Actually I ran into him at school. He has some student medical proposal thing going on, isn't that great?"

"Fabulous," Jack replied sarcastically. She shot him a look that could kill and he backed off for awhile. "So did you two have a good time?"

All of his words were dripping with sarcasm and bitterness- regret?

"Yes, Jack, we had a good time," she answered just as deliberately. "We're going out again sometime next week actually."

How did he let this happen? He knew the first time he denied Kate that he would regret it later, when some force or another took away even the possibility of being with her.

"I haven't really heard too many good things about the guy," he tried, earning a fresh sigh from his friend.

"I'm sure people don't hear too many good things about you either," she bit back and rose from the couch. "I'll talk to you later, maybe after you decide to stop acting like a dick."

The words hit him hard, and he rubbed his forehead in frustration. "Wait," he called out loudly, feeling the waiver in his voice. He knew what he wanted to say, but would- could he say it? "I'm just trying to protect you." She turned around, her face as stoic as he'd ever seen it. Suddenly she started laughing.

"Please," Kate cried out, her voice dripping with sarcasm. "You're in this for yourself. You're jealous, Jack! You're jealous because I'm finally getting something that you want!"

"No, that's not it!" By this point he was standing close to her, both of their voices raised and chests seemingly heaving.

Turning her back to him, she scoffed in disbelief. She _knew _that something like this was bound to happen. "You have absolutely no right to play this game with me," she told him sternly. "You may not think you're doing this for the reasons you really are, but take a good look at yourself, Jack." She made to leave, but his words stopped her.

"You're right." Kate looked at him and almost felt bad for what she'd said. His eyes were closed and his body tense. "I'm jealous, and I have no right to be."

"You can't have it both ways... you can't kiss me, then tell me you can't, you can't do something like that, Jack, and then tell me not to date someone! It's not fair to me!"

Veins flowing with jealousy and pent up frustration, he sat, defeated on the bar stool by the kitchen counter. "I know. Do whatever you want, Kate, okay? I'm not making any promises, because I can't stop the way I feel about you, but I can't seem to stop the way I've been hurt either. It won't just magically go away, as much as I've tried."

It was the first time Kate had ever heard Jack admit his feelings towards her with such honesty, and in a way, it made her angrier that he wanted it too, that neither of them could have something they wanted so badly.

"I can't do any more than I've done," she stressed. "I've tried to help you through this, Jack, and you may not see it, or even feel it, but you're a completely different person than when I met you. I think now you're just scared of _us_, not necessarily what happened to you in the past. Is that right?" She stood in front of him on the stool and boldly took his larger hands in hers. He wouldn't look at her.

It seemed as though he was mumbling. "I don't know," he spoke quietly. "I just don't think I could handle it again," Jack finally said.

He needed to snap out of this, she thought. "So you plan on spending the rest of your life alone?"

Snapping his head up at the comment, he finally met her stare. He supposed he'd never thought of his situation in such black and white terms. If he didn't go after Kate, then who else would he be waiting around for?

"I'm scared too, you know," she told him, her eyes now closed and he squeezed her warm hands tighter. Her voice was barely a whisper. "I'm scared that I'll ruin you, or hurt you more, or even be hurt myself."

Finally, she thought, as she took in his words, his shallow breath, he was saying the things she wanted to hear since the day she met him. "We could be scared together," he managed to croak out, and Kate found herself lost in his dark eyes.

This woman was too much to give up, he thought, as he pulled her gently towards him from his seat. Her soft body molded against his, in between his legs and against his chest, and her hands traced either side of his face gently. He stared at her for what seemed like forever, until she leaned down in the slightest bit, feeling his warm, sated breath against her cheek. To her surprise Jack pulled her into a hug, and she settled her head in the warmth of his neck, breathing his scent in. Her arms wrapped around his broad back, and she was sure it was the warmest hug she'd ever received.

Boldly she placed a flushed, lingering kiss on his neck where he held her, and soon she found her face in his large palms, his thumbs running up and down her soft, rosy cheeks. Staring at him like this, he'd never seemed as vulnerable, but at the same time, he'd never been quite this intoxicating. He grazed her chin and she felt her stomach churn and flutter, a mixture of nervousness and excitement making its way through her. Finally, they were inching together and his breath landed on her just before his lips. She nipped at his bottom lip, scratching her nails lightly on the stubble which adorned his face. She wanted to drink him in, in case this was her last chance.

Jack's body buzzed from the contact, even from the sheer thought of having Kate, this wonderful woman, pressed up against him, her pouty lips against his. He'd thought their other kisses were wonderful, but this one, when he wasn't questioning what he'd say to her afterwards, or where it would take their complicated relationship, was so much better.

She felt him open his warm mouth against hers, drawing in a shaky breath. Taking the opportunity to drag her tongue lightly across his bottom lip, he suddenly responded to her, inviting her into his mouth. They melted together in a twist of tongues and lips, in a deep, slow, wet kiss that left both of them breathless. Kate let him kiss up and down her sensitive neck, burrowing closer to his mouth when she felt him suck lightly. All of a sudden it was too much- his hands grazing her hips and back, his hot, skillful mouth on her neck, the breath that was now against her cheek. She kissed him again, this time, long and frantically, and he understood.

Traveling to her ear, he whispered, "You'd better give Paul a call," and she laughed, running her hands down his sides and then back up to rest on his chest, pulling his mouth against her own once again. He sighed into her. This felt right.


	12. Another Round

Another Round

She couldn't sleep with him. He couldn't sleep with her. They wanted to, but that would make it real, wouldn't it? Jack's mind whirled with thoughts, possessing him almost. There were too many questions- so many he didn't even know where to begin. Sitting across from him, Kate's light eyes peered into his dark. She'd thought that once she broke him of his past, hers would magically fade away as well. It wasn't so.

They'd broken apart, breathless, before things got too out of hand, before they reached the point of no return. She found Jack intoxicating, more so than anyone before, but it didn't stop the memories from flooding her mind. The whole time Kate had blamed their near misses on Jack, on the fact that _he _was the damaged one, that _he_ was the one preventing them from being together. Perhaps there was more sense behind his actions than she'd ever thought. Jack had acted on impulse- something so rare for him, outside of his career. He didn't regret it, but he also didn't know where to go with it.

* * *

"It finally happened," she said in a sing-song voice, turning away from the coffee pot in the teacher's lounge with a fresh, steaming mug.

Caroline whipped around to face her, her long red hair practically hitting Kate. "You slept with Paul?" Maybe it worse than she thought!

"No. God no," she insisted, holding her free hand up. "I mean with Jack."

An almost devilish smile stretched across Caroline's face. "You slept with Jack!" she insisted excitedly. "You _have _to tell me what it was like... he just looks like he'd be good, doesn't he?" She was rambling excitedly for her friend by this point, and Kate hated to interrupt.

"No, I didn't sleep with him...But we kissed, and it was completely and totally amazing, and I think this time it's for real." There was excitement, some sort of fire in her eyes and she let out a squeal at her friend's reaction.

It had been all Kate was able to think about, how he felt against her, with no inhibitions, his playful and lovable side shining through. She'd been daydreaming most of the afternoon- she just hoped she wasn't getting her hopes up.

Caroline grabbed her ungraded papers and they walked out into the hall. "What did I tell you?" she smirked. "And for the record," she told her, this time quietly, "When you _do_ sleep with him, you're telling me all about it."

* * *

_'Stop by, handsome!' _He smiled, grateful for the pick me up after his long day at the hospital. Underneath her small note laid a pile of letters, all with large, choppy handwriting. Reading the top one, he realized they were thank you letters from her class, from the day he'd come to in play doctor. They were all sweet and funny, whether they meant to be or not.

'_Miz Austin got all red around you!_' one read and he chuckled.

Soon he was knocking nervously on her door, debating what he'd say to her. They hadn't talked much after their get together the previous night, from nerves he suspected. In a strange way, though, they'd said all that needed to be.

"Hey," she greeted him with a humble smile. The look on her face told him she was feeling apprehensive- how were they supposed to act? He hadn't done this in awhile. Boldly he leaned down and kissed her, innocently, but for a long moment, and the action erased most of her fears about rejection.

"So," he managed after a few seconds of silence.

"So, uh," he tried again, hesitantly. With a guilty grin spreading over her, she silenced him by placing a finger gently against his lips.

"Let's not do this, okay?" He looked at her, confused. Didn't women usually want to define a relationship? "I think our words will only ruin something that was pretty great, right?"

Thank God, he thought. "Right," he told her softly, running his fingers gently through the long tendrils of her hair that draped between them. She laid her head on his warm chest, content with silence.

"I'm sorry if I pushed you," Kate said finally, still against the front of him.

Vibration coursed through his chest and she felt the rumble of it when he let out a small laugh. "In case you hadn't noticed, you didn't make me do anything..." She enjoyed the slight amusement in his voice.

"I think I acted a little more confident earlier than I actually was..." she admitted sheepishly. "Cause I'm kind of freaked out. But I mean that in the best way possible," Kate smiled.

He studied her, and his glances made her feel jittery and nervous. "Because of what happened with you and your fiance?" He asked carefully, knowing that he was entering shaky territory. Nodding, she felt her cheeks blush, as if he could read her mind.

Lacing his hands between hers, he continued. "So I'm not sure if these are about to be those 'words' you were talking about..." he paused and they both broke into smiles. "But, how about we just take this slow, do whatever we want and see where it takes us?"

Kate hadn't been aware that her breath was trapped in her chest all this time, but she felt her body relax at his suggestion. "Yeah. That's perfect, actually."

She was overwhelmed with the desire to kiss him again, and grinned when she realized she _finally _could. Jack must have know what she was thinking, as she felt his hands grasp the back of her neck and pull her to his mouth, kissing her slowly, her body melting into his once again. She didn't want to have all of these questions, she thought as she was trapping his lip between hers. Then it happened again- that state where she stopped thinking and just took in the feeling of him against her, this time with so fewer boundaries. Maybe she was naïve, but she couldn't think of why someone would ever abandon this man. The way he made her feel... hadn't it happened to anyone else in his life?

His tongue sneaked out and she granted it access to her own, weaving them slowly together in movements that made the pit of her stomach drop. Gripping the soft flesh behind her hip, he let out a breath of amusement into her mouth. She pulled away slightly. "What?" she asked him with a coy smile, playing with the collar of his shirt as they sat relaxed into the couch together.

He said nothing for awhile, and just ran his hand up and down the skin. "Are you going to tell me about these?"

"You couldn't wait for this day to come, huh?"

He shook his head. "Nope." His grin was infectious and his mood light. Kate appreciated it.

"If I tell you tell... deal?" Giving him her best serious face, she pulled her body away from his and sat up.

Jack had pulled her shirt up in the back before she got the chance herself, tracing his fingers lightly over the ink that adorned her skin. It made her skin prickle, and his other hand was planted firmly on her other hip, her back mostly to him. He scooted behind her, the resulting bend in the cushion pulling Kate's body slightly back towards his.

"So... this one," he started, pressing into the top design. "Fess up."

"The quote?"

She felt him nod as he leaned his chin on her shoulder. His stubble tickled the exposed skin on her neck. "Umm... okay, that was my first one," she admitted. "I basically got it to piss off my parents, so it's not exactly my favorite any more."

The writing was impeccably tiny, but poignant nonetheless.

"Whether you think you can, or think you can't, you're right," he read, nodding his head. "I like it. It fits you."

"And this one?" He ran his thumb over the abstract design that flowed down from the quote. It was colorful and vibrant, just like Kate.

"Something I drew one day when I felt particularly inspired..." she trailed off. Here she was, confessing her tattoos to Jack, and for some reason it felt completely normal. "The day I got engaged."

"Oh," he said, trying not to drop his tone, but failing.

"I guess it's good I didn't get his name inked on me, huh?" Her laugh was bitter.

"What _was _his name?" It suddenly struck Jack that she'd never mentioned it, and he'd never bothered to ask. There he had been, moaning and complaining about his divorce from Sarah and the state it had left him in, and he hadn't even bothered to ask Kate more about her own past.

She turned her head so she could see him. "Greg."

He pressed two fingers onto the final design imprinted on her side. "And this one... this one I'm particularly curious about."

"I got it after the break up," she told him, her soft eyes looking back at him. The symbol stared back at him, mysterious and enigmatic. It told him nothing from the surface, and he supposed she wanted it that way.

"It's just about moving on," her voice wavered. "It's my favorite one," she smirked and he laughed against her back.

Still, he didn't stop touching her back, and she adored the soft brushes she felt. Eventually, when his lips had found her neck, she suspected he was trying to break their deal. Her hand smoothed his hair and she pulled away from him.

"Your turn," she teased, tracing his exposed bicep. She started with the symbols at the top of his arm.

His warm eyes connected with hers. "They're about moving on too," he whispered, and there was no need for him to tell her he'd gotten them after his divorce.

"Hmm, well looks like we have more in common than we thought," she told him, brushing her lips against his teasingly. "And what about those?" she asked, still against his mouth, as she held his inner arm. The colorful designs stood out against the starker tone of the previous. It too was rather abstract.

It was becoming difficult for him to find the words, with her pressed against him, with her lips just barely separated from his own. "The stars are just for kicks." He paused and kissed her quickly. "But the rest ... uh, those are supposed to be a sign of masculinity." He knew he hadn't been clear, but it was the easiest explanation possible.

"About regaining it after Sarah left you?" she asked him boldly, yet softly. He nodded against her, surprised at how easily she read the meaning. She tickled his sides, delighted to feel him squirm against her and attempt to pry her hands way. It lightened the mood and he threw her a half-smile, an emotion that told her almost nothing in terms of what he was thinking about, only that he was happy.

"Okay, I know there's at least one more..." she hinted, before attacking him like he had done to her, pulling his shirt up in the back to reveal the block of script towards to top of his back.

She squinted and he laughed. "You know, squinting like that won't help you read Latin."

Kate smacked him playfully. "Shut up. What does it mean?" Her fingertips skimmed the surface of the design and she trailed them down his back unashamedly, resting them on his waistline.

She could tell that perhaps this was the most important to him, judging from his lingering silence and following simple words. "It's just a reminder to never give up on myself, you know?"

"Yeah." Kate paused. "Any others I should know about?" she asked him fliratiously, bobbing her eyebrows up and down.

He laughed at her statement but more or less brushed it off, returning to the other tattoo. "I got it a few days before I met you... how's that for destiny?"

She gave him a sideways glance, as if to discard his compliment. "Come on, Jack. You pulled yourself out of it, not me. You obviously wanted to believe in yourself even before you met me. Or you wouldn't have gotten that lovely, _permanent,_ tattoo," she teased him.

"Maybe," he said indifferently. "But I'd like to believe something different."

_Just a quick note- thanks so much for your reviews, it's amazing to hear what you think about each chapter. Also, the tattoo portion of this chapter was supposed to be them learning more about each other through a topic you wouldn't necessarily think would do so... hopefully that came across alright! And please know that I completely made up the meanings- I have no idea what Foxy's tattoos mean, and I don't really care! I just made them conveniently fit my storyline! Hope you like it. :)_


	13. Heels Over Head

_Sorry for the long wait- sometimes I think I'm too busy for all of this! Thanks for your amazing reviews, as always... and please let me know what you think about this one. I think some of you will be thrilled at the ending, and maybe some of you not so sure? Hard to tell:)_

Heels Over Head

Jack pulled his car into the parking lot of the restaurant he and Kate were meeting his mother at. She squirmed nervously beside him, tempted to chew on her painted fingernails. He knew that fancy restaurants and formal occasions weren't her favorite thing and he'd by lying if he said he loved them, but he'd been raised that way.

"So you haven't told her yet?" Kate asked him as they sat in the parked car. "About us?"

He laughed quietly, squeezing her hand. "No, but why are you nervous? My mom loves you."

She glared at him. "You know how moms change when another woman comes into the picture..."

"It'll be fine," he told her with twinkling eyes, and she wished sometimes he wasn't so charming. "Let's go or she'll just pick on us for being late."

They walked hand in hand into the restaurant, and Margo noticed them right away. Jack saw the flash in her eyes and the small smile she gave him when she saw their hands laced together. The older woman stood when they approached the table, and Kate frowned when a man around the same age, with dark, thinning hair stood next to her.

"Jack, Kate," Margo started, smiling, "this is Richard." The man reached out to shake Jack's hand. "And Richard, this is my son Jack, and Jack's... Kate."

Kate felt Jack tense beside her from the introduction. It appeared as though the two were dating, and for all that Margo asked about his life, he sure didn't know much about hers. "Nice to meet you," Jack offered politely, and Kate did the same.

They sat down together and made small talk, but surprisingly throughout the entire meal Margo never asked them about their budding relationship. More reserved than he normally was around his mother, Jack sat and observed the two together- how she was giggling like a teenager and flirting with the man beside her. Kate rubbed her hand along his knee under the table. She knew Jack's relationship with his father had been strained, but still, it hadn't even been two years since his death, and seeing his mother with another man had to be hard.

She wondered why Margo would spring this on him in public, let alone in front of Richard. It was only going to make him more irrational about it, and Kate knew she'd hear all about it during the ride home, if he managed to hold it in that long. A few minutes later, after they'd ordered coffee, Margo excused herself to the ladies room to "freshen up".

"So," Richard started, clearly uncomfortable, but nonetheless trying to fill the silence. "Your mother tells me you're a surgeon? That must be a very rewarding career." The older man smiled at him across the table.

"Yeah. It is," Jack replied evenly. "Just like my dad."

Kate wanted to laugh out loud at his snarky mention of his father, but bit the inside of her cheek and resisted.

"So how long have you been dating?"

Richard toyed with the napkin lying on the table. "A few weeks," he admitted. "I met her at one of her fundraisers." He paused. "She does fantastic work, doesn't she?"

Kate nodded when Jack didn't react, trying to keep the man from feeling too badly for himself. It probably wasn't any easier on him than it was Jack. Suddenly Margo appeared back at the table, smiling freshly at her son. "Did you all get a chance to talk?" she asked in her seemingly ever present politeness.

"Yeah," Jack smiled back at her, a fake, sarcastic smile that only Kate caught. "We learned all about each other."

* * *

After a long car ride back to their apartments, Kate sat at Jack's kitchen bar, now dressed comfortably in sweats, picking at a jar of green olives. 

"I wonder what the hell these little orangey-red things inside are?" she asked absently, and somehow it made her laugh out loud.

Jack stood with his back to the fridge, staring blankly inside. He wasn't sure what he was looking for, but he'd stay there until he found it. "I can't believe she's dating again."

"He seems nice enough," she offered, though she knew it wasn't the point. I didn't matter how nice or well mannered, or how well the man treated his mother. It only mattered that Richard wasn't his father.

"But it's just... so soon," he added, leaning against the counter beside her.

She rested her hands in the crooks of his arms, leaning toward him. "How long has it been?"

"It'll be two years in March," Jack spoke softly. "It's like she's forgetting about him."

"I don't think so," she told him lightly. "Don't you think she deserves the chance to be happy again? I mean, maybe this is out of line, but... you know what it's like to lose someone too, you know?"

Looking down at where his arms rested on the counter, he sighed. "Yeah, I know. It's just... it's hard to see her with someone else. Someone who's not my dad," Jack countered. His brown eyes seemed confused, like he was tumbling with whether he should be happy for his mom or angry.

Kate wasn't sure if what she was about to say was overstepping her boundaries, or Jack's comfort level, but she decided to chance it. "You know," she paused, "People could be thinking the same thing about you..." she trailed, waiting for his reaction. He gave her a puzzled look.

"Sarah?" he said hesitantly. On her nod, he shook his head. "No... it's just not the same thing. My father died, Kate. Sarah was the bitch who cheated on me and then left me."

"Maybe," Kate offered, popping an olive into her mouth. "But I bet other people want to see your mother happy just as much as you want her to be, and just as much as she wants _you_ to be." Her eyebrows raised at him, eliminating some of skepticism from him. "At least give the guy a chance?"

Jack nodded, smiling slightly at her, then turning it into a smirk. "Why do you always have to be right?" he asked with a joke, closing the gap between them and kissing her lightly. Kate felt him smile against her mouth and she pulled back.

"What?" She tugged on his shirt playfully. "Is kissing me really that funny?"

"Nah," he smirked. "Kissing you is far from funny..."

She stood up and pushed him against the counter, letting her body meld into his, her hands resting on the counter behind him. "Then what?" she quizzed him, kissing his neck playfully.

He smiled down at her. "That little red thing?" he laughed. "It's a pepper. A pimento..." He moved to kiss her again, but she drew her head back.

Not accepting her denial, he leaned back in, as Kate laughed and let him kiss her, before she mumbled against his mouth,"I knew I kept you around for a reason."

* * *

"Dr. Shephard..." a nurse called him, this time in a sing song voice. His attention snapped back into reality. 

"Hmm? Sorry." He looked over the chart she handed him and signed at the bottom to authorize additional medications for a patient.

The nurse smirked at him. "Watcha thinking about? I haven't seen you like this in a long time," she added, taking the chart back from him.

"It's nothing," Jack assured her. "Just having a good day, that's all." He hadn't been trying to hide his good moods lately, but sometimes it felt awkward. His colleagues were noticing he seemed different, just a little later than he'd noticed himself.

"Been having a lot of those lately, huh?" she asked him. Jack stopped and gave her a look, one that would normally tell a person to stop asking questions, but she took it in stride. "So what's her name?"

He couldn't hide the guilty grin that overcame him before he turned around to walk away. "Kate," he called over his shoulder.

* * *

"I don't understand why he's so upset," Margo breathed to her over the phone. For one reason or another, Jack's mother had called her, most likely wanting to get inside Jack's head. Kate sat on the couch, resting her feet on the coffee table, listening to Margo ramble on and on, but wishing for nothing more than a nap. "Does he want me to be by myself for the rest of my life?" 

She stopped talking and Kate took it as a sign to finally pipe in. It was the first time in the duration of their conversation that Kate felt like her opinion was being asked. "Of course not," she said sweetly. "It's just hard for him to see you with someone else when he was used to you with his father."

Margo huffed into the phone. "Well he's just going to have to get used to it, I guess."

"You should talk to him about it. He needs to hear it from you," Kate added, trying to will her eyes to stay open.

Jack's mother changed the subject in an instant, as if she hadn't just spent twenty minutes spewing out reasons for moving on. "So you and Jack are together?" It was rather blunt, Kate thought, but she should be used to that by now, she told herself. "It looked like you were, unless Jack likes to hold all of his friend's hands."

Kate laughed out loud, despite Margo's forwardness, her tone was humorous. "Yeah," she smiled. "I think that's safe to say."

"My God Kate, how'd you do it? I worked on him for over a year and he wouldn't hear any of it," she complained.

"It just kind of happened... I don't know how." It was a bit awkward explaining to Jack's mother how they got together- surely she didn't want all of the details?

Margo sighed into the phone in fake annoyance. "Okay, okay, I'll butt out for once in my life, if only because I want this to work out for the two of you. But I'll be grilling Jack later, don't you worry," she laughed into the phone.

It was amazing how much confidence his mother seemed to have in the two of them, and Kate wondered if it was more than her own.

"Margo," she found herself saying. "Why are you so happy about this? I mean... moms usually get jealous about this kind of stuff," Kate pointed out.

"It's simple," she told her over the line. "You brought my son back."

* * *

"Hey," he said swiftly when he got home that night from work. "You look tired," Jack told her. 

Kate rolled her eyes and gave him a peck on the lips. "You sure know how to make a girl feel special."

He opened his mouth, but nothing came out. "I'm kidding," she joked with him. "I am tired," Kate admitted. "Long day I guess."

"Me too. Let's lay down," he whined into her ear, the warm breath ironically chilling her.

Tugging on his hand, she pulled him to her bedroom, flopping down on the bed. He crawled in next to her and closed his eyes. "Oh God," he moaned. "I never want to get up. Ever," he said dramatically, making her giggle and smack her arm across his torso, leaving it to rest there.

"I missed you today," he admitted softly, scooting over so he could kiss her.

Grinning, she broke away from him. "How much?" she teased him.

Jack brought his lips back down to hers, kissing her deeply, his tongue sneaking into her open mouth and caressing her own, making her forget all about her question. Kate tugged on his shirt and he rolled on top of her, cradling his hips in hers. Her hands wandered, but she didn't want to stop, and judging from his enthusiastic attack on her neck, Jack didn't want to either.

"I thought you were tired," he breathed against her, letting his hand slip slightly up her shirt.

Running her hands down the back of his neck, she laughed lightly against him. "On second thought, not so much." She pulled him back down to her, looking into his eyes before pulling his shirt over his head. Soon Jack had rid hers as well, and his stare seemed to get as intense as ever.

"Jack?" She kissed him shortly. "Do you want this?" Her words were breathy and her eyes were starting to haze over.

"Do you?" he mumbled against her neck. He already knew his answer, and for some strange reason, he wasn't thinking every single thing over in his head. All he knew was that he wanted this woman, no questions asked. They'd been dancing around the bedroom part of the relationship, but their need for each other had become more apparent each time they were together.

"Do you think this is all too fast?" she asked, worried that he'd regret it if they followed through. Would this change everything they'd worked so hard for? It wouldn't, she decided, because not being together would only place doubt in their relationship, and they both wanted something real, something concrete...

Jack buried his face in the crook of her neck, planting kisses on her shoulder, letting his hands reach to the button of her pants. "I think... we've wasted enough time," he told her, sliding the zipper down, hearing a content sigh escape her mouth.


	14. Past, Meet Present

_A special thanks to Athena and Gillybean for their suggestions, and of course to those of you who reviewed. _

Past, Meet Present

_Kate was coming down from her high, her legs wrapped tightly around him, scratching her nails along his back, just as Jack reached his, biting pleasantly into her neck and breathing heavily. His weight remained on top of her and his head close to her neck. He didn't want to move just yet, as Kate's neck was a safe haven, her traveling fingertips graceful and comforting. _

_Finally, when their breathing had slowed, he looked into her eyes and kissed her sweetly, but a bit longer than he'd intended, and rolled off of her when they broke apart. Kate kept their hands latched, just as they had been earlier when they moved together. She moved to rest on her side, staring at his relaxed, sated face until he looked back at her, almost dreamily. They smiled at each other and Jack turned to face her, running his free hand through her long hair. _

"_Hey," he said in a hushed tone. _

_Kate closed her eyes, sure that the smile on her face was just as far away as the one he'd just given her. "Mmm," she moaned happily. "Hi yourself."_

_Whatever doubts that started to form in her head as they were tempting sleep were erased when Jack scooted closer to her, his stubble scratching the delicate skin on her cheeks and chin as he moved to suck lightly on the spot just below her ear he'd found she liked so much. Kate laughed in his ear when the same hands that she'd discovered the talents of a short time ago scaled down her body, and she rolled on top of him, taking him by surprise. And afterward, when they'd finally drifted off to sleep, Jack found his mind pleasantly empty._

* * *

He woke to light suckling on his neck by Kate's warm mouth. Feeling his movement, she pulled back slightly and looked into his brown eyes. "Morning," she mumbled happily before returning to her actions. 

Jack laughed against her and pulled her mouth up to his to kiss her quickly, even though every feeling in his body was screaming for more. "You're trying to make it a good one, huh?" he asked her, amused, but mostly happy that the morning didn't present the awkwardness that could've easily been there.

It should've been awkward, he thought, but it wasn't somehow, as they eased together in such a way that it seemed they'd been together for ages. The sky outside was just beginning to lighten when he slacked against her, confident that nothing could go wrong now. Not today.

"I have to go to work," he told her in between chaste kisses. "And so do you."

"You always have to ruin all the fun," she teased him, her green eyes flashing at him. Only then did a brief awkward moment ensue; when Jack got up and gathered his clothes from all around the bedroom, dressing silently. When he was finished, they stared at each other expectantly, though neither was sure what to say and how much longer the air would be filled with silence.

"So," he said, failing to meet her eyes and shoving his hands into his pockets, making Kate feel for a moment like they were back at the beginning. "I'll see you tonight?" he asked hopefully.

"You better," Kate smiled back, gathering the sheet around her body and leaning up on her knees to give him a kiss goodbye. "And just so you know," she told him coyly. "She was crazy to leave you."

* * *

He scanned the cafeteria for his mother- she'd managed to get him to cave in and have lunch with her. It was on Jack's terms, however, as she was being forced to eat in the culinary masterpiece that was the hospital cafeteria. 

"Hi," he said, kissing her on the cheek before taking his own seat.

"So," she got right down to business as they were standing in the line. "I had to hear from Kate that you two are together?"

"You're one to talk, mom," Jack rolled his eyes. "Thanks for putting me on the spot about _Richard_," he said, his voice dripping with sarcasm.

"Okay, okay. Fair enough. He's really a nice man, though."

They sat down together at an empty table. Jack picked at his food and Margo didn't pretend to be enjoying hers. "So is this serious, Jack? With Kate?"

When he'd been trying to deny his feelings for Kate, being serious about anything other than his job was out of the question. But now that he'd managed to get to this point, he didn't see the sense in backing out or giving up on something that was so hard for him to achieve in the first place.

"Yeah, it is," he said, bringing his eyes up to meet his mother's stare. He saw what he thought might be happiness, or maybe it was relief, flash through her dark eyes.

"Good," she told him. "I'm glad that if you're going to move on, it's with her."

Stubbornly he rested his elbows on the table. "And what about you and this guy? How serious is it?"

"Not too," she retorted. "Can't you just be happy for me, Jack?" Margo put her fork down and set her stare upon her son.

He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms on his chest. "I just think you're moving awfully fast."

"That's within your right to think," she said fairly. "I loved your father, very much, and I'll never be completely over him. I'll never forget him."

"I know."

"But we both know he was far from a perfect man, and I put up with a lot, Jack. More than you'll ever know about or I want you to know about. So now that Richard has come into my life, or even if this doesn't work out, someone else, I deserve the chance again."

It finally clicked in his mind that he'd made his mother's dating too much about him. After all, he'd been given another chance too, even though he'd tried to blow it all away. Although stubborn, Margo deserved to be happy, and to have someone to share that with. Even when Christian was alive, he wasn't around enough to share much at all with.

They'd finished their meals, or what they ate of them anyway, and he hugged his mother goodbye. As he pulled away, she raised her eyebrows at him. "You look particularly happy today... any reason for that?" she asked him, giving him a slight wink and walking away, her heels clicking on the hard floor.

* * *

Kate skipped her coffee that morning, finding that she was still running on adrenaline. Any more and she would've skipped down the hallways. Still, out of habit she made her way to the teacher's lounge while her class was at gym. 

"You were right," she told Caroline, scaring her red headed friend from the table, where she was reading a magazine.

She looked up, distracted. "About what?" Kate reached into the fridge and poured filtered water from the clear pitcher.

Kate smirked at her friend. "I'll leave it at... he doesn't just _look _like he'd be good." She turned on her heel and walked swiftly from the lounge, feeling Caroline behind her not long after.

"Wait," she called out in a pout, practically running down the hall after her and waving her arms frantically. "I need details! My boyfriend isn't as gorgeous as yours!"

* * *

Jack scoffed as the elevator doors in his apartment complex almost shut, before a foot stuck between them, forcing them to bounce back open. 

"Thought it might be you," Kate smiled devilishly, her arms full of groceries. Jack pulled her into the elevator, and this time the doors shut in front of him.

She kissed him hello, stopping when they'd reached their floor. He helped her with her bags and she promised she'd be over in a few minutes. Unlocking the door, Jack stepped inside and found that it welcomed him home instead of reminding him about his once pathetic life. He wasn't sure how long he stood there, but it was long enough for Kate to sneak up behind him and wrap her arms around his waist.

"How was your day?" he asked her happily, turning around and pulling her toward him.

"Good," she answered briefly. "Better now," Kate smiled, wrapping her arms around his warm neck and leaning her forehead against his. She didn't have to wait long before he'd pressed his lips against hers. She smiled against him and he returned it, but somehow they didn't break contact. It easily could've gotten out of hand from there, she realized, but she wanted to talk, to make sure everything was okay with them, although judging from each other's reactions things had never been better.

"I had lunch with my mom today." He walked over to the fridge and got out a cold beer for himself. "Want anything?" he motioned.

"Oh yeah? How'd that go?" she asked, accepting the bottle of beer from him gratefully. Jack sat on the armchair and patted his lap as Kate giggled and sat on it, wrapping one arm around his neck and shoulder.

He leaned back comfortably, resting his chin on her arm. "She put me in my place," he offered, laughing lightly. "I'm going to try. With Richard." Richard's name still rolled off his tongue with some attitude, some reservation of sort, but Kate was glad he would try to accept that his mother, too, was moving on.

They sat together, drinking their beer in relative silence, enjoying the company that sometimes even silence could bring. Was it supposed to be this easy? Kate had never thought so, not until now, when she found herself comfortable just listening to him breath, or watching his face relax when he closed his eyes. She ran her hand over his short hair, enjoying the soft but prickly sensation it sent over her palm.

"So I knew there were more," she joked with him until he opened his eyes and gave her a look of confusion. "Tattoos," she added with a smirk, watching his face break into a grin and his hands tickle at her waist. "Now I know why you didn't show me before," Kate managed to croak out through her laughter, trying desperately to pry his stronger hands from her stomach.

Finally he stopped after she'd started thrashing violently around, afraid for certain body parts of his. He nuzzled her neck, continuing to make her squirm. He breathed into the soft skin there, breathed her in. "You act like I didn't find one more on you," he laughed and she smacked him playfully.

"Yeah, well not many people get the opportunity to see that one." She sat against him, remembering the smirk that had crossed his face when he'd found it and the way he'd traced over it on her inner leg.

A wicked idea ran through his mind. "How many?" he asked as nonchalantly as he could manage.

"How many people have seen it?" Jack nodded against her, trying desperately to suppress the laughter that was quickly threatening to burst out.

Kate turned so she was straddling his lap, looking down at him with a somewhat amused glance. "Jack..." she said slowly, "Are you trying to ask me how many people I've slept with?"

The man she'd come to adore in such a short amount of time grinned guiltily at her. "Maybe."

She whispered in his ear, as if there could possibly be anyone around them listening. "Five?" he mocked her, shouting this loudly, earning himself a smack. "I'm kidding, babe," Jack said, and it surprised him that such a term of endearment flowed right out of his mouth. "Five's fine," he reassured her. "I knew you were no saint," he wiggled his eyebrows up and down.

Kate looked at him expectantly, but he sat that, pretending not to notice her intense stare. "What?" he asked innocently, the mischievous glint still in his eyes. "Fine," he rolled his eyes. "I knew I couldn't get away with this without having to answer too."

He took awhile to answer and she smacked him. "I'm no saint either," he tried, holding back his answer. "Umm... I don't know, somewhere above 10 and somewhere below 20?"

"Seriously?" Her eyes were wide and she was almost outraged, but she took another look at the man she was sitting on and realized there were probably girls chasing after him.

"College," he explained. "I had a penchant for the bottle during med school," he laughed. "You're not mad are you?"

"Nope," she teased him. "Caroline was right, after all."

* * *

Jack made his way from his car the next morning, surprised that he wasn't more tired. He hadn't gotten much sleep over the past few nights, not that he ever did, though. The parking garage was dimly lit in the early morning, and he rubbed his eyes on his way to the elevator. A man was standing there already, tapping his foot but otherwise waiting patiently for it to arrive on their floor. 

"Morning," the man told him.

Jack grumbled back as pleasantly as he could, glancing at his watch.

"Kind of cold this morning, huh?" the man conversed, and Jack nodded. He was tall, but a little shorter than Jack, with light brown hair and fierce blue eyes.

They stepped into the elevator and found themselves alone in it. The man saw Jack getting his badge out of his bag. "You work here?" he asked, seeming interested.

Jack nodded, and the short ride came to a halt at the ground floor. As he stepped off, the man tugged on Jack's arm, and then suddenly his fist smacked roughly against his cheek, blind siding him. Before Jack had gotten the chance to react, the man's fist connected with his jaw, sending a blow to him that knocked him to the ground.

"Stay away from her," the man threatened him, hovering over him dominantly. He began to walk away in loud steps, but stopped a few short of the exit. "And Jack?" he called out nastily as Jack had begun to collect himself on the ground. "Since I know you won't stay away from her, tell Kate I say hi. The name's Greg."


	15. Redemption

_I think a few of you missed the boat last time- Greg is Kate's ex-fiance. It was mentioned a couple chapers back, only briefly, but I didn't want to hammer it home. Hopefully that clears some things up for a few of you! So maybe go back and read the last chapter to get the desired effect, haha! And you'll also learn a bit more about him, and about Kate this chapter. _

_And where oh where have some of you reviewers gone? I'm not complaining, just curious. Hope you're still interested:)_

Redemption

Jack picked himself up off the hard concrete ground of the parking garage. Blood was dripping from his nose but he tipped his head back while he walked out of the enclosure in attempt to stop the flow. The man, Greg, he'd called himself, was still in site, walking surprisingly slow for someone who'd committed such a thing in a relatively public place, with cameras nonetheless. Jack's jaw ached from the blows he'd received, yet he still found himself running after the man, confident that he wouldn't be taken by surprise this time.

He paced behind the man, the bleeding in his nose almost completely stopped by now. Normally, he told himself, he wouldn't have gone after anyone like this, someone who was obviously a threat. As soon as the man had introduced himself, Jack had known who exactly he was and who he wanted. After all, there wasn't much chance of another 'Greg' wanting him to stay away from Kate, right? He'd heard of the jealous ex-boyfriend types, but weren't all of those stereotypical things- violence, threats, just on TV? From what Kate had told him very briefly he got the impression that Greg had been the guilty party in their relationship- he was the one who cheated and left her. Why would he be back for her when he'd left her so easily?

Greg turned around, sensing someone behind him. He saw Jack and scoffed at the man. "I thought I warned you," he said in a harsh voice, stepping close to the taller man. "If you were smart you'd just do what I said."

"Why are you here?" Jack found himself asking, despite the fact that he couldn't help but flinch when Greg got back in his face.

The other man laughed and Jack became even more confused over their situation. "So she at least told you about me?" He paused. "That's surprising, even for Kate."

Their eyes danced over each other's, a mess of jumpy pupils, Jack's dark and Greg's light. "She told me enough that I know she doesn't want to see you, so why don't you go back to wherever you came from?"

"What?" Greg dismissed, "And have wasted a week of my life following the two of you around?"

Something inside of Jack snapped, and all ability he'd had before of reasoning with the man disappeared, as his fist connected with Greg's face and he sent him back toward the earth. But sometime, between Jack's punches and his own scrappy moves, the other man had managed to hoist himself up from the ground, and Jack, still dizzy from his own injuries couldn't stop him from running away. Greg's last words to him, spoken just before he'd run away, jostled through Jack's mind.

"_You better get out while you still can." _

He wasn't sure what to do now, as he sat on the sidewalk, clearing his head and willing his body to return to normal. Eventually he walked off angrily, debating in his mind what his next move should be. He was pretty sure that he hadn't put much fear in Greg- sure he'd beat him to the ground, but Greg had essentially gotten away with starting it and had to be feeling good about his chances, whatever his intentions were. As he walked to hospital he was suddenly conscious of how much danger Kate was in, and how much danger he potentially was in, all of the feelings that his anger had managed to mask until now. He didn't want to believe that Greg was in LA on will alone, and that laugh he'd given when Jack mentioned Kate... what was that about?

* * *

_Call me. Emergency. _Kate grew concerned when she read the text message from Jack. He normally didn't contact her during the day, and if he did, he certainly didn't waste his time text messaging her. Luckily it was just before her kids were to head out to recess, so Kate finished her spelling lesson and rushed them out the door. 

When she'd arranged for a sub for the rest of the day, Kate found Jack at the hospital, sitting on a cot getting his face stitched. "What happened?" she asked, flustered from her trip over and her growing concern. He wouldn't tell her much of anything over the phone, simply telling her to get to the hospital when she could, since he wasn't in a state to leave.

The doctor putting the stitches on his cheek finished and snapped off the gloves, walking out of the room after a few kind words and warnings. "Are you sure you want to know?" he asked, stressed, rubbing his hands over his short hair.

She ran her fingertips hesitantly close to the three stitches on his cheek, careful not to graze them. "Jack?"

"You know how you told me about Greg?" he asked simply, and Kate's eyes flashed boldly. "Apparently he didn't really want to leave you," he said, frustrated, as he stood up quickly and began pacing the small curtained room.

"He's here?" she asked him with a shaky voice, having to switch places with Jack and sit down on the flat cot.

"Kate," he said, taking her hands. "I don't want to scare you or anything, but he's been following us, or that's what he told me anyway. He attacked me in the parking garage this morning..." Jack trailed off, noticing how scared the normally confident and assured woman in front of him was becoming. The last thing he'd wanted to do was scare her, but how else was he supposed to tell her what had happened? "So I went after him, and he told me... so I hit him, and I kept hitting him, but it wasn't enough..."

Jack sat down on the small cot, his frozen frame next to hers. "They arrested him, right?"

"No," he said bluntly, his anger returning. "He got away from me." His words were sharp and formulated. "I have to call the police."

"What are we going to do?" Kate's voice was small and it wavered with emotion. "He knows where we live, where I work..." she trailed off.

Jack put an arm tight around her. Why did their happiness have to be beaten out of them so quickly? "I'll figure it out," he promised her in a hushed voice. "I won't let anything happen to you."

She wished she could believe his words, that she could believe undoubtedly that he would protect her. She wished life could promise things like that, or anything really.

"He's dangerous," Kate told him, starting to grasp the situation more surely. "I was afraid something like this would happen."

"Why?" Jack asked her, confused. "I thought he... well not to be harsh, but I thought he basically dumped you and kicked you out?" She was hesitating, he knew, because she wouldn't look him in the eye, becoming suddenly interested in her fingernails. "You can tell me anything," he coaxed.

As he said it to her, he realized that if Kate told him the same, he would have reservations about opening up to her, despite all the reasons she'd given him to trust her. And in that moment, in that hesitation, he knew that for her it was the same, but somehow it wasn't offensive- it was comforting in an unexpected way that they were both on the same level.

"I know." Kate let her head drop in discouragement onto his shoulder beside her. "He just... seemed like that perfect guy, you know? And then... then it just turned out that he wasn't."

"But what does he want from us?" Jack stressed. He knew all too well about thinking you knew someone...

"He was always controlling," she mentioned. "I guess he doesn't want me to be happy, even if he didn't want to be with me. Or maybe he does," she shrugged. It didn't matter anymore. Not to her.

* * *

After calling the police, who had told the pair they'd be on the lookout for Greg, Jack and Kate returned to their apartment. The whole drive home they were paranoid, now feeling as though everywhere they went they were being followed. Jack held onto her tightly when they walked through the parking lot and into the lobby, only letting out a sigh of relief when they found themselves in the elevator alone. 

"Jack?" she asked him quietly, still gripping his side. "I'm scared," she admitted.

"I know," he breathed back, pulling her into him, if only because he could think of nothing else to do, and comforting her seemed to be the best option.

As they walked the hall, she spoke. "I don't want-"

"I know," he interrupted her, unlocking his door and leading her inside. "Stay here tonight."

* * *

He should've known not to approach him, he thought as he hunched down to the ground, attempting to settle his hurt stomach and sore face. When he'd watched them together, Greg had known Jack was strong, but somehow he thought he could get away with it, that it would only take one try to make him stay away from her. To hurt her. It made him sick to see Kate with another man, and so happy, too. She never had looked quite that content around him. 

Greg was lucky he'd escaped from Jack's punches and run for cover, now holed up in the hotel room he'd been renting for the past week. It wasn't hard to fool them with fake credit cards, he thought, as he had always looked like a trustful enough guy, but so had Kate. Look how that turned out, he told himself.

He wasn't exactly sure how he'd come to find her, or how it happened so easily. Kate's mom had never been good at reading people, so it was simple getting out of her that her daughter had moved to LA. And finding a teacher in LA? Not so hard, either.

When he'd managed to track her down, she'd been with Jack, and immediately he became another target, _the _target, in fact. It was quite easy to see that she hadn't told her new boyfriend about her past. At least not all of it, anyway. Greg almost wanted to warn Jack to get away from Kate before she left him- just like she'd done to him almost a year ago when one night he'd come home to find all of her things missing, along with her. There was a note on the counter that he'd memorized from reading it over and over. But now, after he'd gotten over his heartbreak, he was angry. He was angry at her for breaking his soul, his life, and everything he knew, and he wanted nothing more than to break her and anything in her life that was important to her. Right now, that meant Jack.

As he sprawled across the bed, holding an ice pack to his cheek, he wasn't sure what he'd do next. After bottling up his emotions for so long, letting them brew inside of him, he'd begun to feel like another person. He was, he supposed. The old Greg would never have plotted against anyone, let alone Kate and a relative stranger. But now, after she'd left his life in shambles, he wanted to leave hers that way too.

He'd just have to be more careful the next time.

* * *

She didn't sleep much that night, drifting in and out of consciousness, her body jumping at every sound, real or imagined, and her senses on overload. Jack was awake too, she knew, as his body was tense next to hers. The reality sank into both of them- there was nothing either could say that would make it all better, or truly put it to the back of their minds. The blinds couldn't be drawn tight enough, the locks on the door couldn't be bolted any further, but she still didn't feel safe, even with Jack's arm wrapped tightly around her middle. 

"I don't know how to protect you," he admitted in the darkness.

"I know. It's okay," Kate reassured him. She'd known this since before he'd promised to keep her safe.

He kissed her neck softly and she found herself rolling over to face him. She kissed him fully on the lips, deepening it, because the only thing she was sure of right now was him. He responded to her, flattening on top of her and pressing his weight into hers below him. It made her feel safe in some strange way, and maybe he knew it. He undressed her slowly, never leaving her for long, kissing her neck and all down her body, trying to make her forget about everything, even if it was only for a little bit. In truth, Jack wanted to forget what had happened too, he wanted to stop thinking about what _might _happen. Even through his divorce and the trying times afterward, he'd never wished more than now that he could predict the future, so if he told Kate everything would be alright, it would.

Jack moved and she moved against him, letting out breaths and mumbling words he wasn't sure of, but was at the same time. When he collapsed against her, she stroked his face in her hands, wanting to say those words so badly...

"I..." she began, and he lifted his head to look at her, sensing that it was important, "...thank you," she finished. He smiled at her softly. It wasn't quite what he thought she was going to say, but in a way, she didn't have to. She'd just shown him, and he'd shown her.

"I _will _figure this out," Jack stressed, but still said quietly.

If he was so worried about Kate, then who would watch out for him?


	16. Show And Tell

_The beginning is a flashback explaining why Kate left Greg. Kate doesn't have some huge secret like some of you are thinking, and I'm sorry if it's what you were hoping for! However, more of what I'm trying to touch on here is how Kate is keeping the fact she left Greg, and not the other way around, from Jack. Obviously this would be hard on Jack, considering his past with Sarah... This story is more about Jack and Kate's "journey" together, or whatever you want to call it, and I feel like introducing some huge secret life of Kate would kind of overshadow the character I've already written for her, who showed no signs of that beforehand. A lie about a situation is a little different than lies about your entire life, because in the end, the intention of Kate's lie is to protect Jack! Anyway, I'm also not going into the Kate as a "villan" type of character, either, because that's just so overdone:) Anyway, hopefully that's clarified a few things and you'll understand the whole intention of this. And as always, thank you for your reviews, and please keep them coming! They're so fun to read, with all of your predictions and suggestions. (And just so you know, a few of you have hit my intention with Greg's character head on!) And I promise that the previous lightheartedness of the story isn't gone forever..._

Show And Tell

_Their wedding was three days from that night. All of the preparations had been taken care of, and in a way Kate almost felt bad for leaving other people to clean up that mess because she'd fallen too hard for Greg to realize what was happening to him. To her. _

_He'd been perfect for so long, everything she'd dreamed of in a man and more. Maybe that saying, the one about things being 'too good to be true' was right, she thought. She glanced at the coffee table, and staring straight back at her was a picture of herself and Greg, so happy... so naïve?_

_For the past several months he'd begun to harness her into the life he wanted for them- looking for the perfect house for them to live in after they were married, pressuring her for children, making her feel bad for standing up for himself. He didn't want her working, didn't want her having her friends over to the apartment anymore, or keeping her own bank account. She'd brought up her resentment to him, but Greg had managed to turn her into the guilty one for feeling that way. Maybe this all wasn't his fault, she thought as she turned the frame face down onto the glass surface of the table. Maybe she was wrong to run away from this._

_But, as she remembered, last night had been the final straw. _

"_Kate!" he'd called out from the bedroom. "Bring me my briefcase, will you?"_

_Kate rolled her eyes from her place in the kitchen, but walked over to the couch and picked up the case, walking into their bedroom with it. She plopped it down on the bed where Greg was stretched out with his laptop. When she'd made it to the bathroom, she frowned, searching the counter for her birth control pills. _

"_You know where my pills are?" she asked him curiously, poking her head around the corner. _

_Greg finally looked up, meeting her eyes and giving her a small smirk. "Oh. I threw them away since you won't be needing them anymore."_

"_What?"_

"_Well, you know, since we decided we'd start trying right away. We talked about this." _

_Kate remembered that conversation, or rather the one sided argument Greg had provided. She'd hardly agreed to start a family with him right away, in fact she fought hard in the other direction. It was amazing that Kate's opinion on something so important could be so unimportant to him._

"_You told me yourself you wanted this, Kate," Greg told her, eerie sincereness seeping into his tone. It was unbelievable to her how skewed his thought process had become. He actually thought she wanted this? "Don't let me down now," he said to her, trying to make her feel guilty. "You know it's what I've always dreamed of."_

"_No," she started. "You know I want to wait a little bit," Kate told him. "I never told you I wanted to start right away..."_

_There was a glint in his eyes, the one she hated. "Sure you did."_

_He was too good at doing this, she thought at the time, of making her feel guilty for things, whether they were as significant as making plans for a family, or as insignificant as what she should make for dinner. Somehow, though, and even more lately, he'd begun getting his way, and everything else had become her fault. She was letting him._

_The time wasn't right for her to fight him, not that it would change anything anyway, so she turned on her heel, desperately trying to hold back the anger that was swelling inside her. _

"_Hey babe?" he asked her, the grin back on his face. "Just think, in a few short days we'll really be together." The statement comforted him as he said it, but it made Kate realize for the first time how permanent this feeling would become if she didn't do something to stop it. She wasn't happy, hadn't been for awhile, and there was no way to lie to herself anymore. There was no way to change Greg- she'd already tried that, and all it had done was cause him to become even more controlling._

_Greg wasn't nasty- perhaps that was the most concerning thing. He knew how manipulative he could be, and he had learned how to orchestrate that perfectly on Kate. What bothered her the most, though, when she really thought about it, wasn't him. She'd allowed herself to become that woman, allowed him to take control over her, when before she'd been independent and free spirited. She never thought she could end up like this- though there was still time, but only if she did something incredibly dramatic and unforgivable. Once she did this it would be over between them, for good presumably, but she couldn't help but wonder if she would ever regret her decision._

_In that moment, during one seemingly small conversation between a couple, one that they'd had many times, she'd decided to leave. She'd do it the next day while he was at work, and where she'd go, she wasn't sure. Anywhere but there, and with anyone other than him. No one else would trap her in that life. No one else had ever taken away her identity so much, so much so that it took her years to even realize who she'd turned in to because of him._

* * *

"So they're here now?" Kate asked him, munching on a french fry in the small diner where they were eating lunch. 

Jack nodded, stealing a fry from her plate. He laughed when Kate peered around the booth, squinting her eyes. "Kate, the point is for Greg _not _to be able to distinguish them from anyone else. They're protecting us," he pointed out, leaning his elbows on the table.

"I can't believe you hired bodyguards." She wanted to roll her eyes at how ridiculous the suggestion was, but deep down she was grateful for his concern.

"I told you I would protect you," he paused. "I meant it."

"I know," she told him, almost shyly, thanking him silently.

Jack sighed, the heaviness of their situation upon him again. "So they're going to be at the school," he started, "And you need to tell them everywhere you're going so they can shadow you," he explained, locking his fingers with hers across the table.

"How long is this going to last?"

Jack shrugged. "Hopefully not long. Until they catch him in the act, I guess."

"I knew you made the big bucks for a reason," she tried to joke with him, smiling widely, and luckily it worked, causing him to break into a wide grin. She'd missed it over the past few days- it had taken her so long to get him that way in the first place that it saddened her to see it disappearing.

She leaned across the table, kissing him lightly, then resisting his attempts to pull back. "Kate," he mumbled against her mouth. "They're watching." His tone was full of amusement and she felt his smile against hers.

"I don't care," she told him in a sing-song voice and kissed him again, this time longer and he didn't resist. She pulled away, satisfied with herself.

"What did you mean when you said Greg was controlling? What was he like?" Jack asked her some time later.

She was a bit taken aback at the directness of his question, but she supposed it was only fair for him to ask some. She hadn't told him much about their relationship, mostly on purpose.

"I guess manipulative is a better word for him," Kate offered off handedly. "Towards... the end, he just became this unbearable person, who tore me down and liked nothing more than to watch." She paused, wondering how much she should dish out. "I guess it's a good thing it's over then, huh?"

"It's pretty obvious he was manipulative... I mean, he cheated on you, and left you, and tried to make you feel bad about it," Jack explained.

"Yeah," Kate replied, a little too quickly for his comfort. "I... just don't know why he's here."

There was something unsettling about her story, and despite several efforts, he couldn't get her to tell him anything else. There was a nagging feeling inside of him, nothing he could identify, but it told him something was wrong. Maybe he shouldn't doubt her so much, he thought, but if his experience told him anything, it was that he needed to be careful.

"So that's it?" Jack asked her, his eyebrows raised as if to say he was a bit skeptical.

Kate glared back at him. "Yeah, Jack. That's it. I don't understand it anymore than you do."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry," he apologized sincerely. "Wanna get out of here?" he asked her playfully after her expression had softened. She went along with his playful mood, but inside her thoughts turned to turmoil. She'd lied to him, this time directly, by denying that there was anything else in her story with Greg. Jack, as far as she knew, had no idea that she'd left Greg. He'd continue to think that Greg left _her _as long as she continued to tell him so... And wouldn't telling him what really happened just confirm Jack's fears about getting into another relationship? There were too many ways to justify it in her mind.

Kate wasn't ignorant enough not to realize the connections Jack would presumably make between herself and Sarah- they'd both left someone, and the last thing Jack wanted was for it to happen again. The situations were incredibly different, she knew, but the result was the same. And that's all the would matter to him.

* * *

Greg sat outside the hospital. He knew it was probably a stupid place to hang out, considering the trouble he'd almost gotten himself into the last time. A few hours earlier Jack had started his shift, but he wasn't sure why he was hanging out at the hospital, or what he intended to do if he saw him. 

_He sighed and walked into the apartment, surprised to find it dark. When he flipped on the light, he became even more surprised, taking in the emptiness of the apartment._

"_Kate" he'd called out her name desperately, although he hardly expected her to answer. _

_There was a note on the counter, the yellow of the paper contrasting heavily to the whiteness of the counter top. The note was short, and to the point. It broke him that she could say goodbye so easily. _

_Greg,_

_I'm sure it's obvious to you by now that I've left. I'm sick of this person you've made me and that I've let you make me. No more. Tell your mom I'm sorry about the wedding._

_Kate_

He remembered their last conversation like it was yesterday. It was a simple one, just like every other start to their day. He'd said goodbye to her and kissed her on the cheek. He would've done more if he'd known it was his last chance.

Greg knew he did the right thing for himself coming all the way out to California. She deserved to pay for what she did, after all. Wasn't it a normal reaction to want revenge? He thought so.

The hood of his sweatshirt was pulled up over his head, concealing him slightly from potentially watchful eyes. He was in a trance, lost in the line that divided the buildings from the colorful sunset. He felt a weight on the bench beside him but didn't acknowledge the presence.

"I think we need to talk," a man said to him. Finally his full attention was captured and Greg turned his head, finding himself face to face with Jack.

He stood from the bench quickly. This guy had balls, seeking him out. Greg looked around for any signs of people watching him.

"He doesn't know it's you," Jack told him. "He would've been over here a long time ago if he did," he mentioned, referring to the bodyguard. In all honesty, Jack had told the large man to go home- he had the feeling that Greg would be at the hospital that day and didn't want anyone standing in his way of speaking with him. He had to do it on his own terms. He had to initiate it.

Greg stood defensively, making a move closer to Jack. "What?" Jack laughed. "Are you going to sucker punch me again?" He stood also, hovering over the shorter man. They were a strange sight- Jack in his medical coat and slacks, Greg in his sloppy sweatshirt and jeans. "You're going to tell me what you're doing here."

"Oh," Greg bit back sarcastically. "Am I?" He paused, eying Jack suspiciously and rocking on his heels. "You don't trust her, do you?"

Jack crossed his arms in front of him, not sure how the man had guessed so easily his intentions.

"So why don't you tell me why _you're_ really here then?" Greg looked at him expectantly, until Jack finally broke.

"I want you to tell me about Kate."


	17. Say It Right

_I had a RARE mostly free afternoon/night, so here all of you are, being spoiled with a new chapter two nights in a row:)_

Say It Right

"I bet you fell for her quick, huh?" Greg told him more than asked, sitting next to Jack on the bench. He couldn't believe that things had gone so smoothly- there he was, having a close to civil conversation with the man who had beat him up in a parking garage only a few days before. Greg met Jack's silence with a bitter laugh. "Yeah, I did too."

"What happened between the two of you?" It was the only question he could think to ask.

"You mean how did it end?" Jack nodded and the other man continued. "She left me. Came home one night and all of her stuff was gone. Like I did anything wrong," he scoffed. "Kate always was a troublemaker... but I thought I'd taken all of that out of her."

"That's kind of funny, Greg, considering Kate told me that you cheated on her and then left her..." He trailed off, aware that he'd just be interrupted if he went on.

An impatient and sarcastic laugh shot from Greg and he stuffed his hands into the pocket of his sweatshirt. "I guess I forgot to tell you she's a fantastic liar, too," Greg offered to him. "She seems so perfect in the beginning, and then she crawls under your skin and never lets you go. I thought that was a good thing... until she actually let me go. She's only going to do the same to you, Jack." He finally looked at Jack, wondering to himself if he had said enough to push the man away from Kate.

Greg only wanted Kate to be his again. She had to be.

Jack leaned his elbows onto his knees, moving his head into his hands. "So why am I supposed to believe you over Kate?"

"Thought you might ask that." Greg stood. "Why else would I come all the way out here? Wouldn't I just be wasting my time warning you about her if Kate's story was true? She deserves this," he added, and crossed his arms in front of him. "Kate deserves all of this," he motioned widely, "And I'm out here to make sure that happens."

His words scared Jack, not because of his open threats, but the calm, unnerving manner in which he spoke them. Greg really believed that he was taking the right, logical steps by coming all the way out to California to plot revenge. Jack didn't need to be a doctor to recognize the signs- Greg had such a distorted reality that he actually believed he was _right_.

Jack let him continue, because it seemed moment by moment the man next to him would spiral further and reveal something else.

"I mean... I come out here... to try to win her back, you know, and then I see her with you! And she's happy and you are too, and there's just something not right about that..." It seemed that Greg was no longer speaking to Jack, instead rambling to himself. His behavior attracted the attention of pedestrians on the sidewalk, who would pass by and shoot him quizzical glances. "But if I get rid of you, somehow," he muttered, "Then I can have her. I can have her and she'll be mine," he finished with a smile. Greg rubbed his palms together, then tucked them beneath his thighs as he sat back down on the hard bench.

The man next to him was past the point of returning to a normal conversation, so Jack sat there, listening to his mumbles intently, listening to the skewed words of a man consumed with jealousy. At the moment, Greg was no threat to him, or to Kate, but he realized that in the future, Kate wasn't his target. He was. Jack flipped open his phone and placed a quick, quiet call to one of the bodyguards, filling him in on Greg's location. They still wouldn't catch him doing anything, but Jack felt better with them knowing where he was. He was sure that they had also placed someone on Greg, to track his movements and document his patterns. They just had to catch him doing something illegal.

Greg sat rocking his upper body forward and backward, running his hands obsessively over his light brown hair. He supposed that all of his experience as a doctor should've trained him not to assume a person's condition by their looks, but other than his current behavior, Greg _looked _so normal.

"Greg," Jack said loudly, attempting to snap the man's attention back to him. His light eyes were large and round with anxiousness, and although he was now looking at Jack, he appeared to still be consumed in his own logic. "Greg," he said again, and this time he was confident he had gained most of his attention. He stood up from the bench and tucked his hands into the pockets of his coat. "Have you ever thought," he asked as he started backing away from him, "that it wasn't Kate who was the problem?"

* * *

He drove to Kate's school- the students had been dismissed well over an hour beforehand but he knew she'd still be there. It dawned on him, suddenly, that he was putting Kate before his work, that finally he'd found something, but better yet, _someone_ worthy of coming first in his life. And then, along with that revelation, Jack realized that he didn't _care _what the truth was, he only cared that she was safe, only cared that she was no longer with someone so mentally unstable, someone so wrong for her. 

Walking into Kate's classroom, he saw her sitting with Caroline, chatting while filling out report cards. She glanced up and frowned, the ease of her face falling into worry in an instant. Caroline didn't seem to notice.

"Jack!" she said happily. "What brings you around? It's not every day we get the pleasure of a handsome doctor coming to visit us." She smiled widely at him, and in ordinary times he would've laughed.

"Kate, can I talk to you?" he asked, his breath hitched with anxiousness, as the other woman excused herself, raising her eyebrows to her friend on the way out.

First, he thought, he needed to give her the chance to tell him everything, and this time, he'd need to be confident enough that what she told him was, in fact, the truth. "Just tell me everything, please," he pleaded with her. "About you and Greg..." She looked at him, puzzled, until he explained further. "I went to see him, and I know it wasn't the right thing to do and that I should've just trusted you, but I knew you weren't telling me something," Jack rambled, "And I talked to him, and he said all kinds of things about you, things that I could never believe... I need to hear it from you. I need to hear about whatever happened from you."

She looked a bit angry with him, and he supposed she had the right to be. It shouldn't have been his business digging up her past, but he'd made it his. "What do you want me to say, Jack?" she asked him quietly. "That I left him?"

Jack nodded. "Well I did," she told him. "Okay? I left him, Jack, because in case you haven't been able to tell, oh, from the time he knocked you around, or from him _following _us, he's obsessive and manipulative, and someone I didn't deserve to be around anymore. Is that what you want to hear?"

He hadn't meant to make her cry, as she stood in front of him with her hands on her hips, so frustrated and unable stop the tears from rolling down her cheeks. Jack nodded at her and a small smile played on his lips. "Yeah, that's what I wanted to hear," he told her softly. "It's all I need to hear."

Kate's eyes bore into his as surprise filled her. He didn't care _what_ the truth was, he didn't seem angry- he just wanted to hear it straight from her. "Why aren't you mad about this?" she asked him pointedly. She couldn't figure out why her own predictions had been so wrong.

"I was. Maybe I should be," he admitted with a shrug. "But then I sat down with Greg. He was acting normal, but then right before my eyes he turned into this man who there was no arguing with, Kate. And I realized that it doesn't really... it doesn't matter who left who, or the particulars of it all, because now you're away from him and you're here with me." He smiled at her, almost sadly and it seeped into her.

"What?" she asked softly, closing her eyes and waiting for the 'but' part of his speech to begin.

Jack dared to inch closer to her, and he swore he could feel her heart beating wildly in his own chest, brushing her hands with his own and eventually tangling his fingers through hers once she'd allowed it. "I just wish you would've told me the truth in the first place. I don't understand what I ever did that made you think you had to lie to me or that I wouldn't understand you did the right thing."

Kate dropped his hands. "You married Sarah," she told him. "And I just thought... 'God Kate, the last thing he needs is another woman who abandoned a relationship.' So I lied. I thought it was what you wanted to hear, or needed to hear, that maybe I was doing you a favor..."

"Well," Jack started, "All I want to hear from now on is the truth. Even if I won't like it."

She pulled him into a hug in the middle of her classroom, surrounded by the small desks and scraps of construction paper. "I'm sorry," she whispered in his ear, thinking, not for the first time that afternoon, what an amazing man he was. He shouldn't have forgiven her as easily as he did, not when she betrayed the trust she'd worked so hard to earn. It struck her how easily all of it could've been destroyed and she clung on tighter to him.

The sacrifice Jack made for her began rousing other thoughts she'd suppressed, and temptation to voice them overcame her again... Still pressed against him, Kate traced the back of his head, running her hands through the short hairs there, raising chills on his neck. His hands ran soothingly up and down her back as if they knew the could give her the courage to speak.

"Jack," she whispered once more. "You want me to tell the truth, right?" He nodded against her shoulder, letting out a small, breathy laugh. "Of course."

Pulling back so she could look into his dark eyes, she eased his now concerned face with a small smile. "I love you," she told him softly, "Even if you don't want me to, and even if you don't like it."

What was actually a few seconds seemed to turn into minutes as she gaged his reaction, the way he pulled his head back as if he was surprised and blinked several times. "Oh," he stifled out awkwardly. When he saw the embarrassment creeping to her cheeks at his response, Jack smiled at her as best he could, despite his surprise. The last thing he'd expected out of this conversation was those three words. _The _three words.

"Well good," he finally recovered, kissing her chastely on the lips then pulling back, only to return to them a few seconds later. "Because whether you like it or not... I love you too," he told her slowly against her mouth.

As they kissed his mind whirled with thoughts- about how willing he was to forgive her, how easily he'd told her he loved her after his initial surprise, but most of all, how much he meant it.


	18. Promise?

Promise?

"Tell me!" Jack whined, pouting as Kate stood behind the couch while he stood in front. He crossed his arms, cocking his head, but this only caused her to laugh.

"Stop being such a baby," she taunted him, circling around the piece of furniture when he came closer, but failing to escape him when he lunged toward her and caught her around the waist.

"Jack," Kate warned him slowly as he pulled her back into his warm body. "Do NOT tickle me." She felt his hands creep dangerously to the waistline of her jeans, running his thumbs over her hips.

"I won't," he told her in a stretched, playful voice, but she didn't quite believe him.

Leaning her head back against his chest, she layered her hands over his where they rested on her hips. "Can't you ever just be surprised?"

He laughed. "You're one to talk." They swayed side to side and Kate thought he'd finally let the subject drop. "Come on," Jack said a moment later, "Tell me." He kissed her neck and she couldn't help but burrow into the feeling, letting his hands run up and down her sides delicately. "You know that thing you keep asking me to do? I'll do it," he offered quietly and in a teasing voice against her neck, as Kate let out a huff.

"You think you can get me to tell you by offering me sexual favors?" she asked, exasperated yet amused. She turned around and looped her arms around his neck.

"Yeah," he said smugly, smirking at her and pecking her on the lips. "You've been rather demanding..."

"Shut up," Kate smirked back at him.

Jack shrugged. "Fine." His hands moved to the front of her taut stomach, raising her shirt a few inches and letting his fingers dance over the flesh. "I warned you..." Kate collapsed in laughter, trying to squirm away from him but failing miserably as began a full fledged attack on the ticklish skin of her abdomen. Giving up when tears of pure, fun torture began falling from the corners of her eyes, he took a seat on the couch and looked at her expectantly.

"Okay," Kate uttered. "But we're only going out to dinner with Caroline and her boyfriend. I don't know why you made such a big deal out of it." Jack gaped at her, surprised that she'd managed to get him worked up over something so simple.

"I don't know what to do with you sometimes..." he muttered, rolling his eyes at her.

"Maybe. But you love me for it." Kate's green eyes twinkled up at him, knowing she was right. He _loved _her. A few weeks ago, she'd have thought herself crazy for even fantasizing about it.

Thinking back it seemed silly that he'd held out from telling her for so long. He was sure he'd known well before the words had been said, but Jack was certainly known for internalizing his feelings.

"Yep," he smiled back at her, leaning down to where her head rested in her lap, kissing her mouth lovingly, "I do."

At the restaurant later that night, the couple met Caroline and her boyfriend, Pete.

"Nice to meet you," the nice looking man offered to the both of them. He had light hair and striking features- Kate wasn't sure why Caroline had alluded to the fact that he wasn't as attractive as Jack. In life it seemed to Kate that people always wanted what they didn't have. She used to be one of them, but not now. She was right where she wanted to be.

After they'd ordered the wine and the bread had been set on the table, Kate noticed a glimmer on her friend's hand against the dim setting of the restaurant. "Oh my God," she said loudly, grabbing Caroline's hand across the table, gaining the attention of Jack and Pete.

"When were you going to tell me?" She smiled at her friend and she beamed right back. She looked happy.

"It was so hard not to!" she admitted just as loudly, showing Jack the ring also.

"Congratulations," he offered genuinely to both Caroline and Pete. Kate rambled wedding talk as if she was born for it, and he supposed that all women had some of that trait in them. He didn't like to think about weddings- the last one he'd been to was his own. Remembering how Sarah planned almost every single minute of the ceremony and the reception with such detail and how she'd wanted such perfection, he laughed inwardly. Her desire for perfection had ended there.

Caroline appeared to be a few years younger than Kate. Did she know what she was getting herself into, he wondered? Telling Kate he loved her was a big step, even if he hadn't been the one to initiate it, but what was she expecting now? He hoped not this.

Kate turned to look at him, noticing Jack's relative silence before their meals came. He tried to smile reassuringly at her, draping his arms onto the back of her chair, but she could tell that his mind was churning with thoughts. "You okay?" she asked him quietly, suggesting to him that she knew he wasn't, raising her eyebrows slightly.

"Yeah." He tore his stare away from Kate's before it made him spill his thoughts right there at the table in front of relative strangers.

Keeping her hand squeezed tight onto his knee, she tried to convince herself that Jack wasn't as easy to read as she thought. But she had seen the look on his face when Caroline had announced her and Pete's engagement- conflict, confusion, strain. Still, maybe assuming what he felt was the wrong way to go.

They finished their meal, the atmosphere becoming much more relaxed by the end of the night due to more than a couple glasses of wine and Caroline's always humorous behavior. Jack slipped his hand into Kate's as they walked out the door, both pleasantly buzzing and slightly cloudy minded. Luckily it was a nice night and they'd been able to walk the distance to the restaurant from their apartments, allowing them to drink a few more than they would've had Jack had to get behind the wheel. Jack wrapped his arm around Kate's waist as they walked in silence and she rested her head lightly on his shoulder.

"What're you thinking about?"

"Nothing much. Feels good for once," he laughed. He'd been extremely relieved when the security he'd hired had gotten a location on Greg and were now following him around and watching for trouble instead of shadowing himself and Kate.

"Mmm," she mumbled. "So it's great, huh? That they're engaged?"

"Yeah," he paused. "Good for them."

"You just didn't really seem that happy for them," Kate tried, hoping for him to open up without having to pry.

Jack stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, tugging on her arm to pull her back to him gently. "Look, do you want to pick my brain about it or something?" Without waiting for her to respond, he continued. "I'm happy for them, I really am... but it just got me thinking, you know?" He paused and closed his eyes briefly. "I don't know what you want out of this," he motioned. "Out of us."

She took his hands in hers, standing close to him so her chest grazed his. "I just want to be with you, Jack. I'm not asking for anything more," Kate told him sincerely, starting to become upset that their fun mood was diminishing.

"Yeah, you say that now, and to be fair it's probably the truth. But what about... a year from now?" he dared. "What are you going to want then? For me to marry you?"

"I don't know. And you don't either, okay? Can we just drop this?"

"No," he said quietly. "Kate, I told you I loved you. And I mean that. I love you."

She played with the buttons on his coat, taking her glance down to them. "Okay..."

"But that doesn't guarantee anything, does it?"

"Jack," Kate cut him off. "We can't guarantee anything, other than we'll try our hardest to make this work, because I think it's worth it, and I think you feel the same way. _Don't_ you?"

"Yeah," he replied almost immediately. "I'm sorry," he started with a wave of his hand. "You know," he hesitated, because he wasn't sure that he should bring it up at all, let alone during what was already a less than perfect night. "He said that he was going after me. That he would get rid of me, in one way or another so you would be his again."

Kate's attention snapped back to the man by her side. "He's crazy, Jack," she said shakily. All this time, even after Greg had initially attacked Jack, she'd believed that she was his target. Was she really that selfish?

"I know," he nodded. "But... I mean, what if something happens to me? What if he finds a way to get to me? Where would that leave you?"

"Nothing is going to happen to you, Jack," Kate said softly, if only to make herself believe it. Maybe it was time to take things into her own hands, do things her own way.

"You can't guarantee that," he offered, a small smirk playing on his face, referring to their previous words.

"Yeah, I can." He seemed content with her promise, though she wasn't sure he believed it. Greg would listen to her this time- she had to find him without Jack finding out. There was no way she'd let Jack be snatched from her life through her own fault.

She set their pace as they continued their walk home, the click of her heels on the pavement matching his strides. "Jack?" she began, to garner his attention. "You really see us together a year from now?"

He blushed, hoping that he could pass it off for an effect of the wine. "Well.. yeah, I mean..." he stuttered. Suddenly he became paranoid that he'd opened up for no good reason, that he'd voiced his concerns and fear of labeling their relationship when Kate didn't feel the same way.

"Good," she grinned at him, standing on her tiptoes to kiss his stubbled cheek.

Reaching the building, Jack held the door open for her and they strode into the elevator, otherwise empty. His arms were crossed in front of him and he was unsuspecting as Kate pressed herself against him, kissing him softly at first, but deepening it quickly as she steadied her hands on his upper arms.

She pulled him down the hallway and he followed willingly, sneaking kisses while she dug through her purse for her keys. "Stay here tonight?" she asked him, her breathing escalating. Responding, Jack pushed the door open behind her and kicked it shut with his foot once they'd made it inside, only breaking away from her warm mouth long enough to bolt and chain the door. Greg was a constant reminder.

Jack was ready to forget about all of the burdens that had been weighing him down- his mother's new relationship, Greg, Kate's lie- so he tossed Kate over his shoulder with a laugh and carried her to the bed, falling on top of her heavily, but she'd have it no other way. Suddenly his weight had shifted and he found Kate on top of him, knees on either side of his legs, kissing him deeply but playfully, unbuttoning his shirt with purpose.

"Hmm," he moaned some time later, dangerously close to losing it. "What're you doing?" he breathed heavily, suckling on a sensitive spot just under her ear.

She kissed him fully, moving over him and locking hands with him. "You promised earlier..." she teased, "That if I told you, you'd do it..."

Jack smiled against her, breathing in her sweet scent that managed to get to him every time, and he ignored the fact that his promise never had to become one; he'd actually won the battle beforehand, but it didn't matter now. "A promise is a promise," he told her, laughing into her, watching her grin mischievously back at him.


	19. Take Me Back?

Okay, so I know it's been a month since I last updated this story! I'm sorry- I just didn't want to post something that I didn't like, and I think in some way I just didn't want to write this chapter! It's definitely the most depressing in some ways, and there's also not much Jack and Kate interaction in it, but hopefully you'll be satisfied with the outcome. Remember, Greg is crazy and desperate! No worries, more of the specifics of the 'outcome'will be explained in the next chapter. I hope you'll review and let me know what you think since it's been awhile. I'm almost to 300 reviews, that's amazing and I can hardly believe it! I'll be getting back to the things that made so many of you like this story- don't worry- they deserve it and it's much more fun to write:)

* * *

Take Me Back?

Kate hated lying to Jack, but it was the only way she'd ever get near Greg. She'd called in sick at school early that morning, choosing instead to spend her day trying to make contact with Greg. He was a creature of habit, and she highly doubted that he'd changed his cell phone number in the past few months in the off chance that she'd get in touch with him.

She knew his number by heart, from all the times he'd made her promise to call and let him know she was safe, or to talk about her day. Or to yell at her. She'd hung up several times while trying to place the call- just what was she going to say? How was she going to deal with this? And how would anything she told Greg make him leave them alone?

But Kate would never know if she didn't try. 

She'd decided to call from her cell phone, since there was a good chance he'd pick up. In all this time, in all that Greg had been up to, he'd never once tried to call her. Why not? Why wouldn't he at least call if he really was so obsessed with winning her back?

Why it hadn't occurred to her before, she wasn't sure. She didn't have to talk Greg out of anything. She had to set him up.

First she called Derek, one of the security men Jack hired. 

"Is everything okay, Ms. Austen?" 

"Fine. I just wanted to run an idea past you," she told him tentatively. 

* * *

"Hello?"

Greg sounded eager and she already almost regretted calling him. But he'd already seen the number- there was no use giving up now. 

"... Hi."

"Kate? I can't believe that's you."

Kate tugged nervously on the hem of her shirt, forcing herself to remember and reenact how she acted around Greg. "Yeah, it's me," she said, with a hint of cheer in her voice.

"So what made you call?"

Now the lying could begin. "I don't know... I guess just all of this has made me think about you and me." She paused, waiting for him to speak. "I miss us."

"I miss us too," he replied over the line, and for a second Kate almost believed in his sincerity. 

"I want to see you. I want to make things right."

He waited a moment, and Kate tried to cover the crackling of the wind over the mouthpiece. "Why did you leave, Kate?"

She knew why she'd left- he was too controlling, too demanding, he'd changed her. But what would he believe?

"I guess I just got scared. About the wedding and everything else. I was so stupid," Kate told him, with as much emotion as she could muster. She had more convincing to do. "If I could go back and change it, I would, Greg. You have to believe me."

"Maybe I do," he finally said. "Where do you want to meet?"

Kate felt some part of her lighten, as if some sort of stress was gone from it. He'd bought it. But then the fear set in. What if something happened to her? She wanted nothing more than to protect Jack, and to protect himself.

"That's the thing. Jack hired some bodyguard guys, and they've been following you around for awhile. I'm not sure where it's safe."

"I know," he told her, his voice edging into the controlling tone Kate had gotten to know far too well, "They're not very good at hiding." He laughed and Kate pretended to find it amusing, although the thought scared her. Maybe she and Jack hadn't been as protected as they'd thought.

"So what are we supposed to do?"

Greg sighed from the other end of the line. "Look, I'm in my hotel room right now. I'm at the Soshten Inn. I'll leave the keycard underneath the potted plant that's closest to my door. I'm in 423. I'll leave for a bit and then meet you in the room at say... 11:30? Does that give you enough time to get there?"

Perfect. It was exactly what she wanted. "Yeah," she told him coolly. "I'll see you at 11:30. I can't wait."

Greg thought they'd be safe from watchful eyes, but he thought wrong. 

Sliding on the sunglasses she'd brought with her on the bright day, Kate drove to the hotel, making sure to take enough time to allow Greg to get out and hide the key. She couldn't quite believe that she was doing this, or that Derek was letting her. She'd had to explain at length, but finally he'd agreed to it. Maybe it wasn't the best plan ever, having Derek hide in the hotel room with them, and his partner Bill waiting outside in case anything got out of hand, but right now it sounded pretty perfect. It sounded like it would work.

Bill followed Greg, assuring Kate when she met Derek outside the hotel that the dangerous man wasn't setting her into a trap. The key was just where Greg had told her, and she and Derek entered easily. She looked nervously at Derek, who seemed calm and like he was used to this kind of thing. 

"I'm not so sure about this," she said nervously, gripping her hands together. 

"Just do what we discussed and everything should be fine. There's a linen closet over here that I'll be just inside of. Remember the word? When you want me to come out?"

Kate nodded towards him, hoping, praying that this would work. "Ohio," she whispered.

She sat on the bed, watching the minutes go by slowly on the bedside alarm clock. She still wasn't so sure about this, about why she suddenly felt the need to take things into her own hands. Because Greg is going to hurt Jack, she told herself. He was more than worth whatever risk she was taking. 

At 11:27 there was a loud knock at the door. It made her jump out of her reverie. And when she looked out the peephole, there he was. The man she'd tried so hard to forget. Her body tensed as she opened the door, as if it was trying to prepare itself for an attack.

Instead, he pulled her into a hug that she tried her best to return without pulling away from his touch. 

"Kate," he breathed. "I was starting to think this day would never come."

He closed the door behind them. "Take a seat."

"I'm so sorry," she told him, willing her eyes to water. "I made such a horrible mistake, leaving you, moving out here, getting together with Jack." She grabbed his hands in hers, and although she tried to block the feelings, his touch was bringing back all sorts of memories. They weren't all bad. 

"You really mean it? You'll go back home with me, we'll get married?"

Kate nodded towards him. "Yeah. It's what I want. Isn't it what you want?"

"More than anything." He paused, looking into her eyes for so long that she struggled to keep the contact without giving herself away. "Why the change of heart?"

"Jack's... he's just too much. He's not like you. No one could ever replace you, Greg."

This was true, Kate thought, just not in the way Greg thought. No one could ever replace Greg and she never _wanted _him to be replaced. She would never compare Jack to the man sitting in front of her.

The news seemed to catapult Greg into a state of euphoria, as he rubbed his palms together and looked down at the floor, beginning to mutter to himself. "Yes," he said, and Kate realized he had no idea she was there, or that he was speaking out loud. "Finally," he said again, quietly and to himself. "But Jack... he still can't be around. He loves her too much... he'll go after her."

This had been what Kate was afraid of, as she listened to him babble and talk of his plans for Jack.

She placed a hand on his shoulder and it seemed to snap him out of his world and back into hers. "So," she began, "When can we leave?"

"Soon. I just need to take care of Jack first. I don't want anyone, or anything messing us up this time around. We're going to be together forever, Kate," he said triumphantly, pulling her head towards his and planting a kiss on her lips. Kate tried to act happy and loving, but the feel of his lips against hers was revolting. Putting her palm on his chest, she pulled away and faked a smile. "We'll have plenty of time for that later, mister. Let's get out of here." Tugging on his hand, she pulled him from the bed.

"Do you know where Jack is right now?" he asked her with a severe look stretched across his face.

"He's at his apartment," she lied, hoping that he hadn't seen Jack go into the hospital today. "Had some of his surgeries canceled." 

"Okay, we'll go there first. I can't stand thinking that he could come back for you... that he could steal you away from me again. No, no," he breathed, his eyes jumping from place to place. He looked crazy. 

Part of her was curious, scared for Jack, and the other part of her just wanted Greg to speak his intentions to harm Jack out loud, so Derek could present proof and get Greg locked up. 

"What..." she hesitated, "What are you planning on doing to him?"

"Get in, get the job done, get out," he stressed. "It needs to be done."

"I don't think... maybe it's not the best way. He won't know where we're going."

It was part of her plan. She knew how much Greg despised being second guessed. 

"I mean, he's not really doing any harm-"

"Not doing any harm? He's keeping you from being with me! Are you going to keep fighting this, Kate? Are you the same unfaithful bitch I was with before? Do I need to do something about that?"

There. He'd snapped. 

"No," she stammered, though by now she didn't have to pretend to be afraid. "I just don't want you to kill him. He doesn't deserve it, and it'll only get you in more trouble-"

"Shut up!" Greg took her wrists roughly in his hands and backed her against the wall. "Jack needs to be gone. I need to kill him to make sure you're mine. You're going to be mine. Forever," he finished nastily, pressing his body into hers, his hot breath hitting her threateningly. 

Greg had gone even more over the edge in their time apart. He'd never resorted to physical violence in all of their time together. But now he'd convinced himself that killing Jack was the right thing to do, that getting Kate back was the most important thing in his life. He'd spare no one who got in his way. 

"Okay," she agreed. "You're right." He wouldn't back off the wall, leaving them pressed together and Kate tried desperately to accept him. Then he kissed her again, deepening it. She had to let him, she had to make him believe that he'd won. All she could think about was Jack.

"Let's do this," he said with a tone of amusement, pulling a small handgun from his jeans. Kate had felt it earlier. "Lead the way."

"Wait." She had to stall. "Aren't you afraid to go back?"

Greg tossed her a look of confusion. "I mean, they're going to suspect you, Greg. Jack didn't exactly make it a secret that you were around. He hired bodyguards..."

"They won't find us," Greg tried, processing Kate's logic. She put her arms around him in a tight hug, twisting him into a position that assured his gun was pointed towards the ground and difficult to get to.

"So we're going back, then? To Ohio?"

Greg nodded against her, as Derek burst from the small closet, catching Greg's hands behind him and knocking the gun away. He handcuffed Greg quickly and read him his rights. The entire time he stared into Kate's eyes, burning his rage into her, imprinting it into her mind. She'd never forget. 

"You'll regret this, Kate," hesaid in an eerily calm toneas Derek dragged him from the room.

* * *

She had been ordered by the police department to go in and give a statement. But there was no time for that now, and she wanted to do it with Jack.

Jack. 

He was at his apartment by the time she got home. He opened the door to her with a smile. 

"Hey. What are you doing home so early?" He hugged her and she grabbed onto him tightly. He felt so much better. 

"What's wrong?" He pulled away and looked into her eyes, then glanced down towards her wrists where bruises were forming.

"What happened? Did Greg?"

She nodded in his direction, pulling him into her again. She never wanted to let go.

"We don't have to worry about him anymore, Jack," she whispered against him. "He's gone."

Kate knew Jack would be angry with her for putting her own life in danger. Hemight never understand that he was worth it. 


	20. Lovesick

Woah. Watch out for the fluff. Seriously. :)

I don't know, one scene from this might qualify as a hard T, but I guess I'll have to let you be the judge of that!

Would love to see some suggestions of where you want me to go with the rest of the story. I'm a bit stuck, and if you help, you'll get faster updates...!

* * *

Lovesick

"I'm fine, Kate. I don't know why you keep fussing over me," Jack complained, attempting to wriggle out of Kate's grasp on his chin.

She rolled her eyes at him, shoved him back down on the couch with a firm hand and put on a motherly tone. "Jack Shephard, if you don't let me take your temperature...!"

"Then what? Are you going to tell my mommy?" he joked with her, even though he wasn't feeling his best.

"Yeah, I _will_ call your mom," she threatened, and although she never would, Kate knew the possibility was enough to get Jack to cooperate. Sometimes she appreciated Margo more than the woman would ever know.

A shrill series of beeps sounded from the thermometer and Kate pulled it from his mouth. "102," she read grimly as he sighed.

"But I feel fine," he lied, wanting desperately to go to the hockey game with his friends from the hospital that night.

Jack sat up to argue with her, but felt a cold sweat coming over him again. He'd caught a bug at the hospital and had been stuck at home for the past few days since he couldn't run the risk of passing his infection to already sick patients.

"Sure you do," she laughed, sitting behind him and stretching her legs on either side. Jack settled onto her chest and sighed when Kate ran a cold cloth over his forehead, dragging it down to his neck and the underside. The action was incredibly soothing. "So why don't you just go, Jack? Why don't you go to the arena that's filled with _ice, _drink beers with your friends and scream your ass off? I'm sure you'll feel better in no time."

"Fine," he bit back, his tone just as sarcastic as the one she'd thrown at him, though he wasn't really mad at her. He knew she was right in keeping him home, trying to nurse him back to health, but it was frustrating. "You're right."

"Hmm?" she pretended, laughing in his ear. "What was that?"

Jack traced patterns on her knees absently. "Wow, I'll never say that again," he said gruffly and tried to laugh lightly, but it only caused him to cough. Kate rubbed her hands through his hair and down to his shoulders until it stopped. "You know, if you don't watch out, you're going to get sick, too." He flipped onto his side and rested his head on her stomach, wrapping his arms around either side of her waist and behind her, comforted by the feeling of her body pressed against his.

"Nah," Kate disagreed. "I'm invincible to Jack germs. I've gotten my cootie shot," she joked. "My class makes sure I'm kept up to date on these kinds of things."

Jack shook his head against her and chuckled. "I guarantee it. You'll wake up tomorrow and feel like shit, and then we can be miserable together."

Kate titled her head back and rested it on the arm of the couch, content with holding Jack against her. Even though he hadn't stopped complaining since the afternoon she'd brought him soup and movies, she got the feeling that he liked her taking care of him just as much as she liked to be there.

"I'm freezing," he whined some time later, though Kate had already figured it out. He was shivering uncontrollably against her as she pulled blankets on top of them, until he settled. She was sweating from the warmth of Jack against her and the four blankets piled on top of them, but she didn't care.

She'd almost fallen into a light sleep when she felt Jack move away from her, tossing the thick blankets from the couch and onto the floor. The back of his shirt was wet with sweat, and his face flushed.

"Jesus, make up your mind, will you?" she joked, and he glared at her, even though Kate could tell he was somewhat amused.

"But I'm so hot," he complained some more, distancing himself from her and standing to cool himself down.

Kate stood with him, tugging his shirt over his head. "No need to keep this on."

"Are you trying to hit on me at a time like this?" he asked her, his grin lopsided and his head cocked to one side, enjoying the feel of the cool air around him.

Fumbling with the button on his jeans, she unzipped them and slid them down his legs. He threw her an amused glance and stepped out of them. "No need to keep these on, either."

He sat back into the couch, not quite sure what Kate had in mind, but pretty sure he'd play along with almost anything. "So," she began, standing in front of him with her hands on her hips, "you probably need to take your mind off of everything, don't you?"

Jack nodded, holding back the smirk that was fighting to present itself on his face. Kate was too unpredictable. She disappeared across the hall, bringing back a box.

"How about a game?" she asked innocently, taking off the lid and setting the board up.

It wasn't exactly what he'd pictured, but Jack acted enthusiastic, leaning forward to the coffee table so he could sort through the pieces. But then her hand was on his hot chest, pushing him backward again so he was relaxed, his tall body slumped down in the cushions.

"_Or_, we could play another game," Kate teased him, trailing her hand downwards, stopping just below his bellybutton. "What do you think about that, Jack?"

He knew she was teasing him, that there was no way she'd do what she was insinuating. Not now. "I'm game for anything, Kate," he teased back, letting her eyes wander over him.

"Anything, huh?" Her hands reached into his boxers and he tensed.

Jack eyed her, and she met his gaze with a mischievous glare. "You're not serious."

A few movements of her hand later Jack knew she was completely serious. He closed his eyes, forcing his mind to wander, to think of anything but being sick, to focus on his beautiful girlfriend and the wonderful effect she was having on him.

He jerked again when her hand was replaced, digging his hands lightly in her hair to encourage her, still not quite believing that this was happening, that Kate would take things this far just to make him feel better, just to get his mind off of being stuck in his apartment. And he loved her for it.

A few minutes later when she raised her head and smiled at him, she laughed at his sated stare and watched as he sighed dramatically.

"Okay," Jack started, "you're officially the best girlfriend ever." He paused, and for some reason, Kate couldn't stop laughing. She hadn't planned on ending their afternoon on such a note. "No, scratch that," Jack continued, "you're like, the best _person_ ever."

* * *

Kate woke and grimaced. Jack was right.

"Ughh," she moaned, waking a sleeping Jack beside her.

"What?" he asked tiredly.

Her head pounded, she was sweating, and she felt like she might die. "I think my cootie shot expired."

Jack laughed and pulled her into his chest. "At least now I can touch you," he teased her, kissing her exposed neck and feeling how hot it was.

She didn't move when he rose from the bed, going into the bathroom and coming back with a handful of pills and a glass of water. He nudged her until she sat up. "Take these," he told her, for a moment forgetting how horrible he felt himself. Kate swallowed the pills without complaint and he knew she must really be feeling down. Her color was off, her eyes didn't have their normal shine, and he swore he could feel the heat radiating off of her.

The phone rang next to his bed and he swore before picking it up, praying that it wasn't the hospital asking him yet again if he could come back to work.

"Oh, okay," he said when he heard the person identify himself. He let the man speak. "Yeah, yeah, thanks so much for letting us know."

Even in her ill state, Kate's interest was piqued, and she turned toward him expectantly.

"Greg got sentenced," he told her with relief, and saw it flash through Kate's eyes too. "He's still at Santa Rosa Mental Institution. They're keeping him there until they deem him safe to himself and to the public."

Kate's eyes wandered. "But that could be... next week, tomorrow even!"

"He's going to jail, Kate. We have at least five years until we need to worry about him again," he smiled.

She looked into his eyes and sighed, so happy that they'd be safe.

"So, five years, huh?" she asked him in a teasing tone. "That's a big promise, Jack."

He hadn't realized what he'd said, but now that Kate had brought it to his attention, he didn't regret either. He offered her a smile that said what his words couldn't.

"I don't believe you're the same guy I met six months ago."

"That's because I'm not the same guy..."

He laughed when Kate sprawled out on the bed, one of her legs draped over his because it had nowhere else to go. "I'm so hot! This sucks!"

"Join the club," he mumbled, lying on his back and waiting for the spike in his fever to decrease and allow him to be more comfortable.

Maybe it wasn't the right time to bring it up again, after they'd fought about it for so long, but he couldn't resist getting a word in.

"Don't ever do anything like that again though, Kate. Seriously."

She scoffed beside him. "We've talked over this to death."

"What if you'd gotten hurt? What if it hadn't worked out so well?" There were days when he wondered how Kate was so bold, how she took the situation in her hands and sorted it out herself. Sometimes he felt inadequate.

"But it did work, Jack. I got him out of our lives because I just wanted us to be together. I want us to be together. I'm not sure what else you want from me, because I'm still not going to apologize for confronting him..."

Jack sighed and knew he was right in thinking he shouldn't have brought this up again. If he'd learned anything about Kate, it was that no one could change her mind. About anything.

"What if I wouldn't have gone after you, Jack? What if that wouldn't have worked out?"

He rolled to face her. "That's not the same thing at all-"

"How? If I hadn't have moved in across the hall, what do you think you'd be doing right now? If you would've denied me, us, where do you think either of us would be right now?"

She had a point.

"I don't know."

Kate ran her palm down the side of his face, feeling the stubbly effect of going two days without shaving. "I just do the things I believe in, for the people I believe in, and the people that I love. He didn't hurt me."

"I know," he told her softly. "I'd do the same for you."

Kate smiled at him. "Finally, we agree on something. Can we just drop this?" And then, "Ugh, seriously. I'm miserable. I'm starting to see why I annoyed you."

"You didn't annoy me. How did _anything _you did yesterday annoy me? Did I _look_ annoyed?"

She giggled and he could see the blush rise in her cheeks. "Yeah, I believe that was when you called me the best person in the world. Ever," she reminded him, pointing a finger to his nose.

Jack leaned forward and placed a quick kiss on her lips. She pulled away. "Jack, we're both sick."

He failed to find the logic in her statement, so he kissed her again, this time longer. "Exactly," he grinned, and pulled her against his overheated body when she started to shiver. His bare chest was hot as it pressed against her shivering form, and he wrapped his arms around her in attempts to warm her. Her skin contrasted; cold and clammy, and she cooled him in the process.

He breathed in the scent flowing from her hair, nuzzling into her neck. Even when Kate was sick, she was perfect.


	21. Tomorrow

Believe me, I know as well as you do that it's been almost SEVEN months since I updated this thing, which is ridiculous even by my standards! Unless you've been incredibly patient and have been reading this throughout this LOOONG break, then you'll most likely need to go back through the past few chapters so you have some idea of what's going on. (I had to...HaHa!) I'd love to get some reviews, but of course I would understand if you didn't since I abandoned you all for so long! Hope you enjoy.

* * *

Tomorrow

"Umm, what are you doing?" Kate asked after she opened the door to Jack, watching him walk through her main living area and into her bedroom, taking an armful of hanging clothes from her closet.

He glanced over at her, a cocky smile on his face as he began the trek back through her living room. "Moving some of your stuff," he said simply.

Kate raised her eyebrows. "Moving some of my stuff?"

"To my place, of course," he laughed.

She had never dreamed that Jack would ever want her things in his apartment. What had started out as her toothbrush in his bathroom was now moving a giant step forward. "What, you think the walk across the hall is getting too strenuous?" she joked.

"Do you not want this?" he asked her, concerned, dropping the pile of clothing onto the couch below him. "I thought we kind of... talked about it?"

It was true that they had brought it up, but tip-toed around it, and Kate hardly thought they had made a decision. The last person she'd lived with was Greg. It was natural to have some skepticism.

She smiled, looking into the brown eyes of her boyfriend, the man all her friends from back home were jealous over. "So why _your _place? What's so bad about mine?"

He set his hands on his hips. "Come on, Kate. You know my place is better. I have a _balcony,_" he laughed.

"What if I don't feel like moving all my stuff?" she pouted, moving over toward him and wrapping her arms around his neck.

He pecked her on the lips, unsure if she really wanted this now.

"I'll move it. Besides, it shouldn't be too hard. Half of it never made it out of the boxes in the first place."

She slapped him lightly on the chest, getting a laugh out of him, before resting her palm against his rough cheek.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" She couldn't help but ask, not after all she'd gone through to get him to this point. Not after all he'd done to move past Sarah. "I mean, it sounds like the right idea because I practically live with you anyway, but what if...?"

He knew she was referring to his past relationship with Sarah. He should be grateful, he thought, that she was potentially giving up what she wanted to make sure it was what _he _wanted. He'd had his doubts about living with Kate. He still had some.

On one hand, they could drive each other crazy in ways that he'd never experienced before this. But on the other hand, he'd never loved someone so much. He thought those drive each other crazy moments would be worth it.

"I know I can't promise that we'll work out, even though I want it to, but I think we need this," he told her seriously. "I've been pretty careful going into this Kate. If... if heaven forbid we don't work out, I know how to deal with that now. Okay?"

She nodded against him, not wanting to think about ever being apart from him, but comforted by the thought that she would never be taken in the same light as Sarah.

"So it's official now?" she questioned, raising her eyebrows, taking on a lighter tone. She'd heard everything she needed to. The last thing Kate wanted to feel was that she pushed him into something he didn't want.

"Sounds like it," he said with a smile, kissing her lightly again and squeezing her body against his, lifting her lightly from the floor.

When he set her down again, Kate surveyed all of her things. "Isn't it going to be a little tight with all of our stuff together?"

He shrugged. "Maybe. We could always look for a bigger place, you know. I'm not terribly attached to this one."

There was a noticeable lift in his spirit when he thought of moving to another apartment. Maybe even a house. Although he was happy with Kate, so happy in fact, sometimes it still felt wrong to have her hanging around the apartment that he and Sarah lived in during most of their married life. And asking her to live _there_? Maybe he hadn't thought it all the way through.

"Not attached to it, huh?"

"Nope," he smiled. "Just to the girl across the hall."

"Good to hear," she replied, suddenly shy. She felt so... adult.

"So you really think we're ready for all this? It feels so... big, I don't know."

He nodded, sitting on the couch and patting the empty spot beside him.

"It is big. But doesn't it seem right too?"

"Yeah. It does."

They sat for awhile, enjoying each other's company, the thoughts of moving in together revolving silently in their minds. Jack had begun to feel a bit stupid for barging into her apartment and moving her clothes.

"So when do you want to get started on this? Moving, I mean."

"I don't know," Kate shrugged. "There's a lot to talk about, isn't there?"

Jack agreed. "Well, I have today off, I don't know about you," he hesitated. He didn't want to sound too eager.

She laughed at his inability to hide his feelings from her anymore and realized she loved it that way.

"Yeah, today sounds good.

They underestimated the amount of differences they would have. After three hours of surfing the internet, arguing on whether to upgrade to a bigger apartment or go all out and buy a house, they were both frustrated and weary-eyed.

"I don't understand what's so wrong with this one," Kate said, pointing to the interior pictures of a large apartment spread near Jack's work. "It's beautiful," she gushed.

Jack sighed, all the while admiring her inability to give up. He was beginning to think they'd never agree on anything. "Look, it's obvious that we're not going to agree on anything tonight," he spoke up, rubbing a hand over her back while she stared hopefully at the computer screen. "Why don't we just go get some dinner or something?"

After a bit she agreed. "Yeah, okay."

When they got down to the parking lot of their building, they stared at their cars, parked side by side. Jack's car always won this debate. His keys were tucked into the palm of his hand, and he laughed when he felt Kate grasp his fingers and unwrap them from around the shiny metal.

"Let me drive?" she whispered into his ear, tippy-toed, kissing his neck with the lightest of touches.

"How could I say no to that?" he grinned, but not before warning, "Just don't kill us, alright?"

"Hey," she teased. "I'll have you know that I've driven this car a total of _two _times and it's still all shiny and stuff, right?"

"Yeah, Kate, it's still all 'shiny and stuff''," he mocked her knowledge of cars.

They ate at one of their favorite Mexican restaurants. Kate insisted on driving home too, and Jack agreed if only to get her to stop begging.

"Where are you going?" Jack asked her as she turned onto a side street they hadn't taken on the way there.

"I'm just starting to know my way around this place. Humor me why don't you?"

Jack sat back in the passenger seat and watched the scenery as they drove down quiet streets, a nice change of pace from the main strips of Los Angeles. The soft lull of the car pulled him into wonderment. Could they really survive living together? Weren't they both a little too stubborn to make it work?

He heard Kate sigh beside him, a small smile playing on her face, the late sun gleaming off her long hair. "You're so lucky to have this car, you know. I could drive it all day."

"You really like it, don't you?" he laughed. "I could, uh, you know... buy you one. If you wanted." Sometimes Jack had a hard time finding the right line between being graceful with his money and egotistical with it.

She let out a cackle of laughter. "I just _love _the fact that you can sit there and just offer to buy a car for someone. I can hardly make rent."

"But you do what you love," he pointed out.

Kate put her foot on the brake as they approached a stop sign. "But you love what you do too, right?"

She'd always been under the impression that while Jack's job was stressful, and often times not perfect, being a surgeon was what he was meant to be. What he was good at.

"I guess," he agreed. "I sometimes wonder if I'm in this because I wanted to be or because my father was."

"Jack, I think if it's really something you don't want to be doing, that you would've stopped by now. You're strong like that. You don't let yourself be unhappy anymore."

Yes, he would agree. But did she know that he owed that all to her? He squeezed her hand tightly, all of a sudden becoming a little overwhelmed at how much his life had transformed in such a short time.

Kate continued driving, winding through a neighborhood Jack had never been in before. He drummed his fingers against her right hand that was resting on top of the middle console. "Wait a minute, stop here."

He waited for her to put the car in park, then hopped out, surveying the grassy property lined with gorgeous town houses.

And a for sale sign.

"Think it's meant to be?" Kate asked, wrapping her arm around his waist.

Jack sighed with relief. The fact that they'd agreed on just the outward appearance was somewhat of a miracle after hours of finding out just how different their tastes were. First there weren't enough windows, or the garage was too prominent, or the layout was too open, but this time, it looked just right.

Kate stored the phone number for the realtor on the sign in her cell, and they drove back to the apartment complex, this time taking the main roads, the darkness making the meandering way home pointless.

"Could you do it again? Walk out on someone, I mean?" he asked, looking out to the lit up street. He'd been thinking through Kate's whole history on the drive, and he briefly wondered if he knew everything there was to know. It wasn't that he didn't trust her- he did, and he thought they'd worked their way past it. But after the shock he went through the first time around, when he realized his marriage with Sarah was over- or she told him, anyway, he thought that having a few doubtful moments was only his way of protecting himself.

If Kate was at all surprised by the inquiry, she didn't let on. Instead, her grip on the steering wheel tightened by a minuscule and she turned to face Jack briefly while there was a beat in the traffic.

"You mean could I walk out on you?"

Jack nodded with hesitance. "I'm sorry, I don't mean to... offend you, or question anything too much-"

"No," she said calmly, "I understand, Jack. You know that I walked out on Greg and after what happened with you and Sarah, and we're about to move in with each other, maybe kind of quickly too..."

"Too quick?"

Kate smiled, warmed by his genuine concern and regard for their relationship. "No, not too quick. Not for me."

He searched her eyes and cursed himself for even bringing this up in the first place. "So could you?"

It was easy to see that Kate was mulling over her words, knowing that one little phrase could cause all of it to blow up.

"Greg was different. Now that I've had some time away from him, away from the whole relationship, I can see all the signs right from the beginning. But I wanted something _so_ badly, Jack, I wanted someone to take care of me, who I could rely on, and Greg was that for me. Or he pretended for awhile, anyway. I didn't leave just because I wanted out of the relationship. I physically _had _to get away from him."

Jack thought about her little speech carefully. "So, so, you don't see those sign things... with me?"

She shook her head. "Not one," she smiled, squeezing his hand. "You treat me better than I could ask for."

He blushed at her words of praise, ducking his head down in embarrassment. She pulled back into his spot in the parking lot, and giggled when he jogged around to her side of the car to open the door.

She laced her fingers through his on both hands, leaning into him, his back against the side of the car. "I think being friends first helped, don't you?"

"Yeah definitely, but it was pretty painful, admit it," he said, glancing down at her, his eyes sweeping across her freckles to her eyes, to the smile on her mouth.

"What, because you wanted me so bad?" she laughed. "Because you couldn't resist me?"

"Yeah, something like that." He leaned down to kiss her, wrapping his arms around her tightly, their kiss deepening. It seemed like they hadn't been together in forever- first with Greg, and then with both of them being sick.

Kate cupped her hands around his cheeks and swirled her tongue with Jack's, feeling the pit of her stomach drop like it had so many times before, his stubble rough but irresistible against her delicate skin. His thumbs grazed the slight line of exposed skin around her waist, and regretfully, he pulled away, giving her one last lingering kiss.

"Hmm, let's go inside," he said throatily.

Kate let her hands slide down his chest, then lower, a mischievous smile appearing when she felt his obvious arousal. She expected to see the amusement returned, but instead was met with Jack's dark eyes.

"You know, there's still time to call the realtor tonight," she laughed, hearing his mumble of protest as he tugged on her hand, pulling her into the lobby and swiftly into the elevator.

He kissed her again when the doors closed in front of them, pulling her body tight against his.

His eyes danced devilishly. "Tomorrow."


	22. What Are We Waiting For?

Yes, my pen name has changed. Long story, but everything else is the same!

Well, at least I can say that it hasn't been seven months between updates this time. That's a good thing, right? Right? ;) I would love to get some reviews, of course! Just one more chapter left!

* * *

What Are We Waiting For?

"Hey, have you seen my hair dryer?" Kate yelled into the bedroom as she rifled through some boxes in search of the item. She pulled her towel closely against her wet body, backing up and about to go ask Jack in person. "I could swear I saw it-"

She bumped into him and smiled apologetically when she saw that he held her hair dryer in his hand. "Kinda hard to find everything isn't it?" he smirked.

"That's an understatement. Now get out," she said playfully. "I need to get ready."

Jack rolled his eyes although he was more amused than anything. He flopped down on her bed and surveyed the boxes spread across the floors of every room.

It was beginning to dawn more and more on him how serious their relationship was. Talking about moving in together was much less imposing than the day they went to sign the actual lease. There was no backing out now, even if he'd wanted to.

She'd won most of the debates over which furniture they would bring with them, and he gladly gave her free reign over decorating their new place.

Twenty minutes later she emerged from the bathroom, her hair done and a bit of makeup on her face. They were meeting his mother for dinner, and although he knew how much she approved of Kate, he was starting to become a bit anxious about delivering the news of them moving in together. He knew that his mother would go to great lengths to protect him. She'd always been that way.

"Think she's going to take it well?" Kate asked him, pulling a casual dress over her head and poking some earrings through her lobes. She looked decidedly less nervous than Jack did about all of this.

Jack gave an uneasy laugh and threw his hands up in the air. "Who knows? I can only hope."

She bent over and rested her hands on the tops of his legs, giving him a peck on the lips. "Everything will be fine, Jack. It'll probably just take a bit of defending on our part."

"What do you mean?" Jack knew that his mother liked Kate, and hell, that was pretty much an impossible feat in itself.

She gathered the contents of her purse and slipped them into a smaller, dressier bag that complimented her dress. "What I mean," she stressed, "is that your mother needs an explanation for everything, so we'll have to give her one."

How had she become so in tune with his mother in the short time that she'd known her? It almost made him jealous, but then he thought that if he could somehow read into his mother that same way, it would make him crazy. "You're too smart sometimes," he told her lightly. "She probably just wants to know that we've thought about this."

"And we have," she said simply, reaching for his hand. "Come on, let's go. We don't want to be late and get on her bad side."

Jack laughed and followed her out to the car. When they arrived at the restaurant Margo was already waiting- and to Jack's displeasure Richard, the man he thought was trying to replace his father, was also seated next to her. He found it odd that his mother chose to bring him again, after the way last time had gone.

He felt Kate squeeze his hand tightly when she saw Richard, as if to communicate, 'don't you _dare _act that way again!' and he wanted to laugh. When he kissed his mother on the cheek, she pulled away and gave him a similar look.

"Richard," he said politely, "nice to see you again."

They made their way through the normal small talk, until Kate nudged him under the table.

"I get the hint," Jack said sarcastically, nudging her back and catching the smile on her face.

Was he supposed to blurt something like this out? It wasn't as if he was telling them that Kate was pregnant, or they were getting married or something equally as big. This was rather small compared to those things.

"Oh, what is it Jack? You're sitting there like a rock. Tell me," Margo said, giving him a stern look. "What's going on?"

"It's nothing bad, don't worry," he said, and took a deep breath. "Kate and I are moving in together. We found a place that we really like."

Margo was silent for a few moments, though it felt like an eternity for both of them. Richard seemed apprehensive of what her reaction would be as well, staring at the side of her face with hesitation.

"And I assume that you've thought this over?"

Jack nodded. "Of course. We both have."

"And Jack, you know after what happened with you and Sarah-"

"Mom, I know that you're worried, but what Sarah and I went through has nothing to do with this. And if feels so good to finally be able to say that. Kate and I have talked about it and it's what we want to do." He looked down to his drink and stirred it, waiting for the next reaction.

Kate let go of his hand and set hers on top of the table. "And it's this really great townhouse, Margo, you'd love it I'm sure. Plenty of space, in a good area of town…"

Margo smirked and for a moment Kate became paralyzed with the fear that Jack's mother was about to turn on her. After all, she'd seen her shred people apart before, and wasn't keen on becoming her next victim.

Margo laced her fingers together across the tabletop and raised her eyebrows. "So you're telling me that you've already made the decision anyway? Am I right?"

"Well, yeah," Jack replied.

"Well then it's settled," she said lightly. "You're moving in together. I don't know why you felt like you had to _ask _me, for heaven's sake. You're both grown adults."

Jack laughed. Even when she seemed okay with something, there was always some sort of fault in the execution. "We just wanted you to know, that's all, mom."

"Well I thank you for that, Jack. And for the record, I'm very happy for the both of you."

Richard came to life again, congratulating them. "Yes, kids, that's so great." He proceeded to ask Jack and about architectural integrity of the building, and had all of the inspections been done?

Margo and Kate were having their own conversation, leaving Jack to fend off Richard on his own. He knew that the two women had planned this on purpose, and despite his efforts to join their conversation, they wouldn't let him, so he was left with Richard explaining the purpose and exact proportions of cross-sectional beams.

"I love watching him squirm," Kate told Margo, glancing over at Jack and meeting his hard gaze, letting her know that she'd be paying for it later.

Margo played with the bracelet that hung loosely from her wrist. "Well, he's going to have to get used to Richard anyway, so he might as well start now."

"It seems like the two of you get along pretty famously," Kate said, happy that Margo had someone who seemed to treat her right.

The older woman rolled her eyes. "You mean you think he can handle me?"

Kate laughed and nodded. "Yeah, that too. But really, Jack will get over his unjustified prejudice against Richard. He's just being stubbornly loyal to his father."

Margo agreed, watching Jack nod and glance at his watch every few moments, but he was still pretending to be interested in what Richard was saying.

"So when's the move in?"

Kate hesitated. Would Margo still be okay with all of this when she told her the big day was tomorrow?

"About twelve hours from now," Kate laughed.

"So soon? Oh wow. Well once the two of you get settled we'd love to come over and see the place."

Kate smiled back, sure that Margo was making an impact on her life. Of course she wasn't anything like her own mother, but obviously Diane wasn't around and probably wouldn't be for a long time. It was nice to have a so-called mother figure.

After they'd had their after dinner coffee and Richard insisted on paying the bill, Jack gathered everyone's jackets and brought them back to the table.

"We certainly wish you all the luck tomorrow," Margo said. "And Kate, watch out for this one when he has to lift heavy things. He gets cranky."

"That went pretty well I'd say," Kate told him once they had arrived back at her apartment, and she wrapped her arms around his waist, lying her head against his chest. "So you have everything packed?"

"More or less. As long as I've got this little thing with me I'll be all set," he said sweetly, squeezing her to him.

She laughed and smiled up at him, touched by his sweet words, as Jack was hardly the over-sentimental, straight- out-of-a-romance-novel type of guy.

"I'm glad we're doing this," she whispered.

"Me too, me too. And Kate, you have to know how much you've done for me, and I probably don't thank you enough for it."

She pressed her index finger against his lips. "You don't have to thank me. " He began to protest. "No, you don't have to thank me, Jack, you know why? Because you've helped me just as much- maybe it's been in different ways, but the thing that makes this relationship work is that we're there for each other and I've never doubted that you'd do anything for me. You know I'd do the same for you, right?"

He nodded and kissed her. "Right. And I love you for it. And for many, many other things," he smiled.

"I love you too, for many, many reasons," she joked back, kissing him long and hard, shrieking with surprise when she found herself on her back, lying flat on the bed, Jack on top of her.

"And what are these reasons?" he asked playfully as he nuzzled her neck and pressed kisses there.

Kate tried to clear her mind, debating whether to be serious or silly. She wrapped her legs around his waist, stilling his lower half. "Umm, you're a devilishly handsome man. I love you for that," she started, meeting his amused glance. "You can cook half-way decently. You have a crazy mother _and _a crazy ex-wife," she went on.

"You're good with a knife," she giggled as he stripped her dress off and trailed his face down her stomach, his lips hitting every inch on the way down.

He gripped her sides tightly in his hands. "It's actually a blade," he mumbled before finding his way to her mouth again.

He watched her while his hands found their way inside her panties.

"Anything else you happen to love?" he asked, breaking his mouth away from hers and attempting to mask his amusement at her obvious change in mood.

She didn't want to stroke his ego too much, but had to admit he was right. There was definitely something she forgot.

"Well, mister, you're awfully good with your hands."


	23. Everlong

Okay, last chapter. Kind of sad about it because this is the first fic I've written that I've actually _liked_! I don't think I'll do an epilogue unless there is some crazy demand for one, because I don't think I'm so good at them. I've tried to give you some idea of what their future holds even if it's not crystal clear! I know it's the end and everything, and there's really no incentive for you to review, but I'm always looking to improve and to hear your ideas. Thank you for sticking with this fic even though I was terrible with updating! You guys are the best. :)

* * *

Everlong

Jack set down the paint roller and glanced at the colored walls with satisfaction. Kate had been nagging him to paint for a few weeks, but he hadn't gotten around to it until now. She was busy enough unpacking and trying to organize their things into a way that she liked and found useful, so it hadn't bothered him.

They'd been in the townhouse for a little over a month, and barring a few intense fights during the stressful time of moving, things were going smoothly. Somehow he thought the transition would be difficult, that they would have to talk about everything, set up some rules or something, but everything had fallen into place. He had started to think that maybe he was worried over nothing.

It was during times like this, when life seemed too perfect and happy that he had always found out that things were indeed too good to be true. That's what had happened with Sarah, anyway. That's what had happened with him and his father. Just when they were starting to have a functional, healthy relationship, he passed away.

_Third time's a charm_, he thought.

Jack heard a key turning in the lock of the front door and realized he finished just in time for a reveal.

"Hey," she said with a smile, setting her bag down on the kitchen table. She looped her arms around his waist and gave him a kiss. "How was your day?"

"Good," he said. He had the day off because of a canceled surgery, a rarity on weekdays. "So?" he asked, motioning to the surrounding walls that he'd just finished coating in light blue.

"Oh!" she exclaimed. "Finally! It looks great, Jack. Thank you,"she said sincerely, hugging him again, and scrunching her nose. "I forgot how much I hate the smell of paint."

He looked her up and down, noticing the way her skirt clung to her body and stopped at her knees, her three-inch heels accentuating her toned legs. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed her neck softly. "The bedroom doesn't smell like paint," he suggested, pulling back to look at her.

She threw him a smirk but didn't turn him down, so Jack picked her up around the waist and hoisted her over his shoulder, setting down the hallway and up the stairs.

"Jack!" she screamed. "Put me down!"

He rolled her eyes and continued up the stairs. "Not a chance."

He was glad that they were almost to the bedroom when she dug into the waistband of his pants and began pulling his boxers _up_, the direction he didn't want them to go. They pulled on his skin and made him think about the discomfort he would experience if she chose to pull just a _little _harder.

She eyes were watery with laughter when he threw her playfully onto the mattress. "What, you didn't like that?" she asked innocently in between fits of laughter. "I thought it would feel _good_."

Since she was straddled across his waist he took the opportunity to pull down her skirt and finger the edges of her panties. "Would it feel good if I did the same to you?" he asked, smiling when she gave him her famous 'Don't you dare' look.

Kate sat up straight and rested her palms flat on his chest. "Jack, I swear if you do that you'll be sleeping on the couch for a while."

He retreated and placed his hands on her hips. "Okay, okay," he laughed. "But just for future reference, I always get even."

"Oh yeah?" she questioned, leaning down and placing a chaste kiss against his chest. Then, with her mouth to his ear, she whispered, "Remember what I gave you last night, buddy? You seemed to enjoy it a hell of a lot, right?"

The chill of her breath against his ear was beginning to get to him, and it didn't help that she was planting dirty images of her going down on him in the middle of the kitchen in his mind. He nodded slowly in agreement. He certainly had enjoyed it.

"Are you going to 'get even' for that, then?" she asked, her voice decidedly less playful, her eyes burning into his, almost _pleading _him.

When she felt herself swiftly being flipped onto her back, his stubble against her neck and then his mouth against hers, his tongue quickly filling it and muffling her surprise, there wasn't a doubt in her mind the wish would be fulfilled.

* * *

"Okay, okay, I get it, and in a painfully obvious way," Caroline said in her usual sarcastic manner. "The two of you are completely, sickeningly in love." Kate sat across from her in Caroline's classroom. Both of their classes were in art at the moment so they took the time to catch up and grade papers together.

Kate had just finished telling Caroline about her afternoon with Jack, and she wasn't surprised when her friend rolled her eyes.

"Well what are you acting so jealous about? What about you and Pete? You've only been engaged for a few months, you guys are probably still all over each other."

Although the last time she'd seen Pete was at the dinner she and Jack shared with the two, Kate had met him several times and thought they were perfect together. Before she and Jack got together she was insanely jealous of her friend's good fortune.

"I guess, but your stories always sound so much better than mine," she laughed, twirling her hair through her fingers and marking some unfortunate kid's spelling test with red ink over several lines. "What do you think is going to happen next? Seems like he's completely over that crazy ex-wife of his."

Kate shrugged. She stopped thinking about her future with Jack as much as she possibly could, but now, with what she'd been holding back from him for the past few days, it had forced those thoughts to the front of her mind. It was impossible _not _to think about it now.

Caroline sensed hesitance in her friend and cocked her head to the side in curiosity. "You've been a little weird the past few days- no offense. What gives?"

She hadn't said this completely _huge _thing out loud yet, because maybe then, she thought, it wouldn't be real. But then again, Kate knew that besides Jack and few select other people in her life, there was no one else she trusted more than Caroline.

"I just- I'm going to tell you something, and you can't say a word to anyone, alright?

* * *

Long after her admission to Caroline, Kate sat at home on the couch, flipping aimlessly through the channels, not watching anything, her brain running too fast to concentrate. She knew Jack would be home in a few minutes.

Like clockwork he waltzed through the door, throwing his jacket across the back of the chair and leaning down to kiss her. He flopped down on the couch, clearly exhausted and happy to be home. She wondered if this was the right time.

"What are those" he asked when he'd settled back into the couch, pointing at the stack of paper on the coffee table.

"Oh," she laughed, picking them up and handing them over to him, "they're from my class. They want you to come back and see them again. Seems like you were a hit last time around," she replied, wrapping her hand around his arm and smiling at him.

"I was, was I?" He shuffled through the papers, grinning and obviously pleased with the cute pictures and terribly spelled letters.

"You have a great group of kids, Kate," he told her. "Of course I'll come back."

"Yeah, they're pretty great. Kids seem to love you, you ever notice that?"

He shrugged indifferently. He'd always thought he had a great connection with his young patients, but he couldn't be sure that really meant anything. The only thing he was good for was making corny jokes to take their minds of being scared of surgery.

"I guess so, I don't know. What's all this about?" he asked, concerned when he saw how tense she was.

"Okay, I should just come out and say it I think. There's no use in being a basket case anymore. I don't know how you'll feel about this, because we sure as hell didn't plan for this. We haven't planned for _anything, _Jack, and I've kind of gone about that purposely, because I didn't want to force you into anything that you didn't want, or weren't ready for."

He cut her off, placing his hand on her knee in support. "Kate," he urged her. "Tell me what's going on."

He knew what his gut reaction to this was, but he wasn't about to say it in case he was completely off course. That would start another conversation he wasn't sure he wanted to have, not if it wasn't necessary.

"Life's all about rolling with the punches," he told her and placed a reassuring smile on his face. "You can tell me anything."

It was a fair statement, Kate thought. He'd never given her any reason not to trust him- nothing serious anyway, and throughout their relationship she'd always felt as though she was the one who had to prove her trustworthiness.

"Okay then," she said. "But after I tell you, you have to say something. Please don't just sit there with a blank look on your face, because that's what I've been picturing in my mind and I dread it, Jack. I absolutely dread that."

He agreed, and turned to face her on the couch.

"I'm pregnant."

It was exactly what he thought she was getting at in the past few moments of their conversation, but even with that he'd done nothing to prepare himself for this moment.

"Wow," he said simply, amazed. "How long have you known?" was all he could think to ask.

"A few days," she admitted. "I- listen, this was the hardest thing I've ever had to tell anyone, because I didn't want to freak you out because I know we just moved in together, and now adding this to it... I don't want it to be too overwhelming."

Secretly he already had a future planned out with Kate. He'd thought about having kids with her, sure, but nothing specific. He had the idea, but _now_, after the news that it was actually going to happen, he could picture it. He supposed that was a good thing.

"Are you happy about it?" he asked her, his eyes soft and understanding. There was undoubtedly a lot to be unsure about.

With her head ducked down, hands shaking, she nodded. "I am now, now that I've had time to think it over."

He smiled. "Then I'm happy about it too."

She breathed a sigh of relief and he hugged her to him tightly, startled to find tears in his eyes.

"Oh, thank God," she mumbled into his shoulder.

"A baby, wow," he said when they pulled away from each other.

"You know, this doesn't have to guide anything that we do in the future. I mean, I don't expect you to suddenly want to get married only because we're having a baby together, you know? I want you to actually want it, okay?"

It was then that he realized his fear of commitment had completely disappeared. "You know what, Kate? I can't say marrying you would be such a bad thing."

They relaxed into the couch with their hands intertwined. "A little baby Shephard," she laughed. "He'll probably come out just as bull-headed as you."

"You think it's a boy?"

"Yeah," she said, glancing down at her still-flat belly, "I guess I do."

"Then that means I have to think it's a little girl. You know we can't agree on this, right?"

She thought about how stubborn, yet giving Jack had always been- when they first met he'd let a complete stranger sleep on his couch, then couldn't shake her off. He'd allowed her to pick his brain and take him out of his comfort zone, but along the way, he'd forced her to get over her past, too.

Kate curled into his side and laughed, picturing Jack with a little daughter to spoil. She glanced up to him with a smirk.

"What?" he asked, mirroring his look and leaning his forehead against hers.

She laughed and held the side of his face in her palm. "Nothing, it's just- since when have we agreed on anything?"


End file.
